CURIOUS INDEX, 11/15/07

If you put some flaxseed oil and ginseng in those smoothies, you can be relaxed, invigorated and boost your antioxidant capacity all at the same time. Come to think of it, I think I’ll mass produce that, grow a mustache and sell it at a local soda fountain. Dr. Macker’s invigorating tonic………

After all, that’s how Coca-Cola started.

Why does the “Urban Meyer texting” bit never get old or unfunny?

I don’t mean to contradict the great and powerful Spurrier, but after describing said action hypothetically, he said, “I think that’s what we’d do.” Now, I’m no word knowing guy, but to this layman that looks like he’s saying he would do that.

Also, spitting in someone’s face has its proper time and place. When being tortured for instance, and if trying to contain Pat White isn’t torture then I don’t know what torture is.

Orson did you have to pay the NFL 20 bucks to say “Super Bowl”? Next time you may have to say “The Super Big Game” like they do on all the radio promos.

This doesn’t make any sense. Only 3 Iowa football players are being investigated for sexual assult? Usually when Minnesotans do something, Iowegians try to one-up them. I wouldn’t be surprised to find out this was a 10 person activity with a full camera and sound crew, with Brian De Palma directing.

Dissapointed not to see any Ernest movies in that Stiffarm WalMart robbery.

A couple [UM] guys were smiling. I didn’t see too much cheering teammates on the sideline. I’m not used to that type of environment. -- What’s that son, the knowledge that despite the quality of your play, your finances will be taken care of and the sex will be more than you could ever handle? Oh yea I guess that’s why they were smiling.

…or embarrassment.

1. BC

Maybe directed by Tom Arnold and all the girls looked like Roseanne. Then charges will be dropped.

If Lamar Thomas refuses to let full-fledged* college football players come into the OB talking that stuff, he’s certainly not about to take it from some pissant recruits. You better keep an eye out for who’s comin’ out of that elevator, Forston!

* Yeah, I know they were from FIU. So maybe let’s say “partially fledged.”

Crabapple Buck @ 8 : Dude, there’s hacking on Hawkeye BBW and then there’s making me lose control of my bowel function. That comment came perilously close to the second one – let’s just say that my fellow temporary inmates at the DMV are giving me a wide berth and lighting matches.

i’m ashamed at how hard i laughed at that text message. kudos.

@BiggusRickus

And I am sure the OBC meant it in that exact way, advocating violence and such. Sheesh.

Hershel’s response to an obviously tongue-in-cheek statement was silly / unneeded / posturing. The OBC should not even had to respond to him.

Maybe it was tongue-in-cheek and maybe it wasn’t. I wasn’t defending Herschel’s juvenile comments, just pointing out that Spurrier, you know, kind of lied.

Does playing expert at Intercourse Hero mean you use all five fingers?

Also, shiny things have already been a cause of significant problems at Iowa already this year, in case we’ve forgotted the “Straight Outta the I.C.” photo shoot from earlier this year.

Boy, the losses must be taking a toll on Spurrier.

In his salad days at Florida, Spurrier would have filet’d Herschel with a clever quip, not even bothering to remind Herschel how stupid he sounds when he uses don’t instead of doesn’t in his speech.

I would truly be sad for Spurrier, were he not the coach at South Carolina.

Spurrier is Chris Tucker from Friday: “I was just bullshittin’, man!”

I’m not sure I’m down with the Intercourse Hero slang. If it’s anything like that other Hero game, then my 13-year-old cousin is better at it than me.

Agreed. The text messaging bit never gets old. Everytime I see a texting commericial I think of what kind of ridiculous text plan Urb has.

“Urban who could you be texting 3000 times?”

“Idk, my bff Tim Tebow.”

No worries folks…in Iowa City rape gets you a redshirt year. These guys will be back on the field in no time.

wes @ 18

genius. that commercial gets me every time.

Speaking of texting…whatever happened to the “Hawgberry”? I’m still waiting for the ressurection of that bitch.

Distilled genius, from The Onion:

“It’s important to realize that our young men have been fighting pitched battles against religious fanatics who have been brainwashed into a culture that seeks to destroy all other ways of life,” Air Force head coach Troy Calhoun said Monday. “That’s just the way Notre Dame football is, the way it’s always been. You can’t reason with people like that. You destroy them as completely, remorselessly, and quickly as you can.”

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/u_s_military_wasting_all_its

1. - Being able to use all five fingers means she is an expert—and you probably should be tested.

Am I the only one that took a couple minutes to read the text? I guess I’m not cool.

Also, totally off topic, I’m in Pensacola for work and I just saw a commercial advertising a $29.95 pay per view for the Gators against FAU. What the fuck? That’s even worse than the BTN (except I could watch).

#23, Zone Left
That would be the 3rd PPV Gator game this year. For $30 you get SunSports coverage complete with commercials.

“The phrase “sexual assault” really should be removed from the legal lexicon, as it’s far too entertaining a combination of words to apply to such a heinous thing. "

If it helps, “sexual blitzkrieg” is still available for use.

I wish I could eat seven to ten PBJs a night. PBJs is some good eatin’.

If it helps, “sexual blitzkrieg” is still available for use.

Stuka? I’ve barely met ’er!

Orson,
The monks have revised the old “umbrella, alms bowl and satchel” rules, they now have cellphones and spend all day in the computer malls gaming these days.