CURIOUS INDEX, 11/13/07

by Orson on Nov 13, 2007 9:45 AM EST

Our weekly to-do list is up at the Sporting News for your perusal. In writing this, we were reminded that UCLA turned over the ball against Notre Dame nine times. That both coaches are still breathing after such a fiasco is an affront to ancient samurai everywhere, who would have happily spilled their chitlins with a katana rather than face life after such shame.

The Boise State/Hawaii game will likely be the lone wormhole into the land of big-shouldered major teams in bowl season, per The Wiz, a fascinating scenario that has the at-large bid currently landing in the Sugar Bowl to face Georgia. If Mark Richt comes out in a red windbreaker and politely murmurs into his headset, throw the college fund at Hawaii/Boise; if they run out to Back In Black, attempt an onside on the opening kickoff, and start cranking dat on the sidelines while drawing unsportsmanlike penalties for excesssive fun, team David needs to start panicking.

Joel's animated blogpoll is up, and features horrible, horrible singing.

Sports betting helps the third world dance. Congress' recent efforts to crack down on offshore sports betting--an American birthright if we've ever seen one--are not just cramping your style and keeping you in possession of pesky things like homes, cars, and other things theoretically convertible to "v-chips." They're hurting Costa Rica. And when someone hurts Costa Rica, you hurt the world, or at the very least innocent yuppie turistas who frequent the place.

Former BetonSports employee Leah Palasis, who immigrated from neighboring Nicaragua, returned from vacation last year to find herself without a job. After a lengthy search, she was hired by a call center but now earns less than half the $1,500 she used to make monthly.

The extra income is not all Palasis misses: BetonSports also offered employees private insurance, a game room, gym and tae kwon do lessons, among other perks.

''I mean, Jesus, we had free day care,'' she said.

No, they're not accepting resumes.

It's still sod off, thank you very much. Mike Leach still stands by his remarks about Big 12 officiating. A pirate never apologizes, but he does sometimes nod sympathetically as he sails away from your burning, bereft village.

Don't make them touch! And stop with the eye contact! Not football-related in the least, but awesome nonetheless.

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Maybe the most awesome video I have ever seen… thank you Orson. A splendid start to an otherwise shitty Tuesday.

by Michigan Gator on Nov 13, 2007 10:10 AM EST reply actions

Not also filed under your ancestor demanding your whatever it is (I missed the Last Samurai and anything else about Japanese culture, basically, ever)? Perhaps I have read this site too much.

Will another Croom song be far behind?

Oh, and have any of you read some of the “coaching rumors” on the national boards?

Tubs to LSU
Spurrier to A&M
Richt to UCLA

Honestly, i don’t understand how anyone can type something that ridiculousl

by Coop on Nov 13, 2007 10:14 AM EST reply actions

Disappointing that the email addresses were all theoretically legit, and not humorous. The MAN is stifling the system, keepin’ the blogman down.

by Brian on Nov 13, 2007 10:15 AM EST reply actions

It’s about accessibility, man. You hook them in with a soft pitch. Then you tell them about Xenu and the evil alien spirits keeping them from accomplishing everything they can in life.

by Orson Swindle on Nov 13, 2007 10:26 AM EST reply actions

Red Meat for USC Fans Dept:

ND & ucla leading off the day at EDSBS….Rats!!!!!!

It is getting harder and harder not to pile on those two……

The LA Times’ TJ Simers had a hilarious column on ucla and family fueding this morning.

by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Nov 13, 2007 10:29 AM EST reply actions

I haven’t seen it mentioned anywhere on the blog, so a slight threadjack to brighten everyone’s day:

LFS sells SEC television rights to Raycom:

http://www.lincolnfinancialsports.com/index.php?s=&url_channel_id=8&url_article_id=338&url_subchannel_id=&change_well_id=2

That’s right SEC Fans; we’re about to be rid of the Tyranny of the Daves!

As an Arkansas fan, I can familiarize you with our new Raycom Overlords, as we used to slave in their SWC Salt Mine.

Crappy 1980s production values of LF Sports? Gone! Replaced by the crappy 70s production values of Raycom!
HD Broadcast? Only if they have Hubert Davis as a broadcaster. Yes, SEC fans— we are moving forward to a bright television tomorrow, a Great Heap Forward, if you will.

by Will on Nov 13, 2007 10:38 AM EST reply actions

I don’t think we’ll see the UGA black jerseys agaon this year.

But I think the goatee and the bringing of the funk are here to stay.

by Rival on Nov 13, 2007 10:40 AM EST reply actions

“Jim just said we could say he’s gay on television!”

Haha, good stuff.

by BDoc on Nov 13, 2007 10:46 AM EST reply actions

Orson,

The traditional blade for committing seppuku is the wakizashi sometimes called the shoto.

The image of Weis committing seppuku at midfield after their last game is kind of frightening. Oh the chitlins, the horror…

by pfhokie on Nov 13, 2007 10:46 AM EST reply actions

Whatever Happened To ____ Dept:

1) Alabama Fans: Man, after the Crooming, they have been super quiet.

2) Auburn Fans: Man, blah, blah, blah, they have been quiet….no threadjacks…

by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Nov 13, 2007 10:47 AM EST reply actions

Why is the ACC still stuck with the glories of LF? I’ve seen higher production values on high school football videos.

by Techie on Nov 13, 2007 10:56 AM EST reply actions

The jack off guy looks surprisingly like a young Andy McCartney from the Class or St. Elmos Fire era.

by Mitch Cumstein on Nov 13, 2007 11:06 AM EST reply actions

I’m actually hoping Richt dons Alice Cooper garb and leads the team onto the field with No More Mr. Nice Guy blaring. Welcome to your nightmare college football. The Anti-Christ has come and he’s bringing hell with him. I think I can live with my decision to support him through the coming seven years of glory before burning for all eternity in the football hells, where San Jose State plays Buffalo on a neverending loop and the tailgating fare is cucumber finger sandwiches and Zima.

by Biggus Rickus on Nov 13, 2007 11:07 AM EST reply actions

The jack off guy looks surprisingly like a young Andy McCarthy from the Class or St. Elmos Fire era.

by Mitch Cumstein on Nov 13, 2007 11:08 AM EST reply actions

Dear Edsall is God,

O-VER-RA-TED. Clap. Clap. Clap Clap Clap.

Signed,

by Everyone on Nov 13, 2007 11:10 AM EST reply actions

did that guy just fake money shot himself???

funny shit though.

by gerry dorsey on Nov 13, 2007 11:12 AM EST reply actions

Actually, the SEC is going to put all the coaches names into a hat and have each team draw from the hat to see who their new coach is.

by NewAZTiger on Nov 13, 2007 11:46 AM EST reply actions

Check out this Bama 2006 schedule and ensuing comments:

http://www.fanblogs.com/alabama/006409.php

Roll Tide said:“7 games on the schedule are already wins leaving tough road games @ Florida, LSU, UT, UArk, and Auburn at home. I see us getting over the hump with Auburn at home and winning at least one of the road games possibly two. With or without a bowl win the tide will have 10 wins.”

by PW on Nov 13, 2007 11:46 AM EST reply actions

Biggus Rickus… I have it on good authority that the Bulldawgs have purchased stilts and special stretch pants 6 ft long… when they enter the field at gametime they will all be 8-10 ft tall and have horns on their helmets… and fake blood shooting out their earholes

did I mention that Coach Orgeron is going to have more fireworks?

by Futbawl Fan on Nov 13, 2007 2:32 PM EST reply actions