CURIOUS INDEX, 11/7/07
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Intercourse Hero debunked. BOO! Pesky facts, presented by pesky fact dick Brian of MGoBlog. Josh McNeil, found in bed with three women, did not pull off the Robert Evans Brunch Package with three ladies over the weekend. They were merely sleeping on the floor and cowering from the police. BOO! on reality. Tuberville will listen, sure, and likely milk some huge money out of Auburn, according to Tony Barnhart of the AJC in a discussion of Tuberville to A&M/Arkansas/Michigan. He deserves the money, too: Tuberville’s 25-5 in the SEC and a bastion of stability in a conference with a quick trigger for laggardly coaching. Or is it? Even [NAME REDACTED] was given three seasons at Florida despite obvious ineptitude. Ed Orgeron and his potentially winless season at Ole Miss are being given another year. Rich Brooks got three years of suck before turning Kentucky into good team like-substance in 2006. Sylvester Croom is still alive in Starkville and producing results in his fourth season. Even Houston Nutt, who’s openly copulated with disaster at Arkansas, has managed to survive almost a decade’s worth of football as the head coach of the Razorbacks. Proposed: The SEC has, for all its reputation as a cutthroat conference, been somewhat stable as job market through the new millennium. Discuss. USC still has Orenthal James Simpson’s jersey in its display case. Well, the man was never convicted of anything, and he did make up part of the dream team of the Naked Gun cast. The article was written by Scott Olin Schmidt, a.k.a. BoiFromTroy, another example of a blogger allowed to fraternize with suck literary artistes as T.J. Simers in the pages of mainstream journalism. Caddy day at the pool! You know what makes a tailgate? Strippers on their day off. (SFW, but does feature bad Soulja Boy-age.) You too can own Matthew McConoughey’s Texas Longhorns motorcycle. It features a burnt orange paint job and will not start if the rider is wearing a shirt or is not blazed to the gills off fine Mexican weed.
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28
Why is it that every SEC fan seems to think Miles departing is a foregone conclusion, whereas most Michigan bloggers (in a limited survey of opinion) find it plausible but not at all likely he’d bolt LSU? Saban transitive properties? It’s obviously not an inferiority complex.
Comment by FieldingH — November 8, 2007 @ 3:05 am
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    We’ve got to keep Tuberville. Even though we might be the back-stabbin’-est, cheatin’-est, Civil-War feudin’ school in the SEC… By some weird gangster-esque manipulation facilitated by former AD Jabba the Housel, we got coach Tub. He’s way better than we deserve. Guy wins pretty reg-lar, has produced a litany of great citizens from his program, and has represented Auburn well. Gotta keep him.
    Lord, if Tuberville goes, I can see Louder and Jacobs hiring someone like Bill Calahan, or worse. NO! Show Tub the money!
Comment by Acid Reign — November 8, 2007 @ 12:03 am
26
Funny I never realized Boi and SOS were the same person.
As far as TJ Seimers, when he got fired from his radio gig in LA I was hoping he’d move on to a smaller market. I was saddened to open up the LA Times the other day and see he was still on page 3. At least it seems like he is there less than he used to be.
His schtick has gotten really really tired.
Comment by oc phil — November 7, 2007 @ 7:29 pm
25
WOODERSON: Let me tell you what Melba Toast is packing right here. I’ve got four-eleven positrack out back. Seven-fifty double pumper. Edelbrock intake, bored over thirty, eleven to one pop up pistons. Turbo jet, three ninety horse power. We’re talking some fucking muscle.
CLINT: Hey man I know you got this thing out a comic book. I saw the add, two-ninety-five, it’s right next to the sea monkeys. You see that over there? That’s white lightning. You see the shoes on that thing, you’ve got to get some tires for this, it’s a pizza cutter man.
Comment by Brian O'Blivion — November 7, 2007 @ 4:21 pm
24
Why hasn’t there been big turnover?
2 SEC coaches have undefeated seasons. (Fulmer, Tuberville)
4 SEC coaches have MNCs. (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Saban)
8 SEC coaches have appeared in the SECCG. (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban, Miles, Nutt)
6 SEC coaches have won the SECCG (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban)
8 SEC coaches have 10 win seasons. (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban, Miles, Nutt)
7 SEC coaches have 11 win seasons (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban, Miles)
6 SEC coaches have 12 win seasons (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban)
5 SEC coaches have 13 win seasons (Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban)
8 SEC coaches have multiple 10 win seasons (Spurrier, Meyer, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Saban, Miles, Nutt)
5 SEC coaches have multiple 11 win seasons (Spurrier, Fulmer, Richt, Tuberville, Miles)
1 SEC coaches have multiple 12 win seasons (Spurrier)
It’s hard to fire anyone in that group based upon performance and competition. If you took the top 3 coaches from the other 5 BCS conferences, it would probably closely match those statistics.
Comment by NewAZTiger — November 7, 2007 @ 3:30 pm
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Re: #14
First of all, excuse my misspelling of desperate and the missing ?. UT is a first-rate institution, even though you wouldn’t know it from my post.
And yes, it seems, in the SEC, the girls are a little less than picky when it comes to their football players. We here in the Big 12 like our boys easy on the eyes, plus some intelligence thrown in for good measure. Of course, we also prefer they’re not in jail. UT (The University of Texas) hasn’t been so lucky this year.
All that brawn does not make them good looking. McNeil is prime example. I’m sure his mother loves him, though.
And speaking of which, his parents must be so proud. Three girls in the bedroom, guns in the apartment, alcohol…
I have a younger cousin playing for a team in the Big 12. If any of us ever heard of him doing something like that…it wouldn’t be pretty.
Comment by UT Ex (as in University of Texas Ex) — November 7, 2007 @ 3:09 pm
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RCR @ 17, I just assumed it was the work of a mad genius such as yourself.
Comment by DC Trojan — November 7, 2007 @ 2:55 pm
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The Orgeron just had an extension. I also don’t think they want to bring back memories when they fired Loser Kinard in midseason back in 73. UM was rewarded with 2nd rate coaches for the next 20 years. This almost ended in the death penalty for them in the early 90s.
The buyout prices on SEC coaches make it cheeper to keep em an extra year in most cases. Sly was given 6 years. Only when there is a true train wreck (see Shula, Mike & Redacted, Name) is there quick action.
As for motorcycles, can’t poor ol Matthew afford an OCC instead of some cheap imitation? We have a pure badass Woodberry Forest OCC here in CLT. Sweet lookin ride.
Comment by yoyofutbawl — November 7, 2007 @ 2:50 pm