Great effort Orson, but stick to your day job… and blogging

With a little production work (knob turned to J-Lo), this could be better than the original.

Orso, you should try hot tea with lemon and honey to soothe your sore throat and improve your pitch and tenor. Otherwise, that was Chantastic.

With all the potential coaching jobs coming open this year, I have to give thanks to Sly Croom once again for whooping up on the Shula Tide last year.

I hate to think who Bama would have ended up with if we had waited.

Though, Michigan has recovered nicely and Tuberville is probably too smart to look like he is running scared from Saban. I don’t think he’ll be going anywhere.

Nutt maybe gone, but I bet Orgeron will get another year.

Still, I’m thrilled that we won’t see Saban back at LSU.

Great stuff (although Randy from American Idol says it “was a bit pitchy”). Joel, you have mad skeellz!

Hilarious. Well done. I love the constant use of the Saban dark lord pose. I have no ill will, but I could see people in SEC country hating that guy.

Because we have guests this week, my regular blogging spot was taken, so I was finishing this thing up last night in bed with my wife trying to sleep beside me. She must have heard that thing a hundred times in her slumber.

This morning she woke up sick.

Just sayin’.

That was fucking great! The only disappointment was when it ended.

Yikes. Let me try that again without tripping over my fingers:

No. 5 — This, from Third Saturday in Blogtober, is helpful to an understanding of what LSU fans might be feeling.

Some AU homer, a radio host elsewhere in the state, on Finebaum yesterday said that he had a source in the Auburn Sports Network that believes Tubs is leaving for A & M.

I’m skeptical personally, but take it for what it’s worth.

And P.S., barners: I was only listening to Finebaum because I happened to be in the car on business. First time I’ve heard the guy in a long time.

There are way too many hobocrackheads in Atlanta with better voice talent that would sing that song for some rock. Please, no more singee.

It indeed does look like the Orgeron will return. You can’t just fire a coach after his first fireworks show.

Craig James was in rare form last night.

Whale? Shark?

8

that is truly amazing. He might be the only coach in the conference not go bowling this year. And this from the school that fired David Cutcliffe one year removed from their first 10-win season (and only SECCG appearance) in bazillion years.

Sir, Ole Miss did not go to the SECCG in ’03. Eli fell on his ass.

The best line in the Special Ed article:

“Unless something completely insane happens – and I mean like breaking the law or something – (Orgeron) will be our football coach next year,” Khayat said.

If it was any other coach, outside of UCLA or Baylor, I wouldn’t be laughing my fat ass off right now.

10

You’re right — that was Saban’s championship year. They’ve never been to Atlanta (or Birmingham, as it were).

Brilliant, Orson…Even though there is coffee all over my monitor now

The dedication to the performance is what made that art. Well, that and the fancy art work.

Its not Col. Reb is Cryin’, but hell what IS?

@ Bama Buck

Sly Croom is always looking to serve his Alma Mater. He’s just that type of guy. And hopefully, after a hard fought battle against LSU, Bama will come to Starkvegas and get served again! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED!

Funny as shit. I like the mini-Tiger.

I don’t think Coach Saban has time for that shit.

A little “moob jiggle” at the end and it would have been perfect.

While funny, I am bitterly disappointed that Saban didn’t sing the female lead.

Coooh! ain? waza ollfoodbawCoachNick adoin’ in dat Bamarama shert? Who dat Miles? I bin polin’ rond ova’ Henderson on da pirogue fa wile now, don’ memba no Miles? Don matta, dem tigas gonna sho dem ol CoachNick coo-yon fa goin down da Kuba.

If this is what it takes to be at the top of the sports blogging world, I’m glad I’m a member of the lower classes.

$50 for the next song to be a Gansta’s Paradise cover.

with a few more dollars and a bit more time, you might come to rival the production value we see at Kansas State.

Sadly, I think that singing was better than anything I could do.

Fortunately, the game last night was the final nail in Gailey’s coffin – or at least said nail being driven halfway in. When we get destroyed by UGA in 3 weeks, this will finally be over.

From the linked AJC article: “Taylor, for reasons unknown, decided not to change.”

Heroic display of solidarity, backing up his fellow teammate that took back the starting job OR a whiny I-need-attention-so-please-put-my-name-in-the-newspaper-even-though-I-didn’t-play move?

Next week when the NCAA formally announces it is investigating Bama; Saban to Texas A&M….book it!

:-)~~~~

Another Georgia fan for Gailey.

I laughed, I cried. It became a part of me. 4 1/2 stars.

Ummmm…..coach Saban says “No, I don’t want you”

I hear Franchione is available thumbs up

Was that Bill Murray?
I want you to do that one again, this time with FEELING!

Now we know why Taylor Bennett couldn’t beat out Reggie Ball. GT has LOFT – Lack of fucking talent.

threadjack

Those Penn State idiots from the video are in trouble. http://www.centredaily.com/news/local/story/248912.html

/threadjack

30

That wasn’t Taylor Bennett out there last night. It was Michael Henig in disguise.

For the number of people who don’t think Saban or Alabama are worth a shit, there sure is a lot of wishful thinking out there about investigations and coaching changes…

Great job Orson and Joel. Now please make it stop.

“don’t forget its me who put you where you are now, and I can put you back there too”

If he is already there now, then why does he need somone to put him back there, where he already is now? It just doesn’t make any sense!

I laughed, I cried, then I laughed some more about how Les is gonna destroy Saban

For the number of people who don’t think Saban or Alabama are worth a shit, there sure is a lot of wishful thinking out there about investigations and coaching changes…

First, it’s about humor value, regardless of how worth a shit Saban may or may not be. If he were to bolt or bama were to get a PLOI, it would be funny as hell. That’s the key.

Second, when the Birmingham News bama beat guy is saying things like “It is more far-reaching than anything having to do with the five players. Remember, the fear is of an institutional problem”, it appears to be a tad more than “wishful thinking”…
http://blog.al.com/rapsheet/2007/10/status_update.html

Tech is a putrid offensive football team

We would beg to differ.

-Notre Dame Defense

To be fair to Taylor Bennet, I think the hype started in the bowl game last year, but I suppose West Virginia’s defense can make anyone look like a high-efficiency superstar. Oh well.

EDSBSLab > Catlab

Orson,

I too was at that Ga. Tech game and had no care who won (although I was sitting with Hokies fans – btw, Hokies fans can’t even tell me what the hell a Hokie IS)
but I was not prepared for the ACC crapfest that sucked away 3 1/2 hours of my Thursday night. the Ga Tech fans LEFT midway in the 3rd and I was not prepared for that. Even Hokies fans were leaving in the 4th and ditching tiny bottles of Jim Beam that they didn’t want(one man’s trash is another man’s hangover)

God help the ACC if this is what a typical game is like

Of course it’s more far reaching than the 5 players. The original problem dealt with athletes of a different sport. Only during the audit that followed did the five football players pop up.

Okay, I’ve been biting my lip up to this point, because I haven’t wanted to sound defensive…..but:

1. There are only 5 football players found to be in violation of the textbook policy

2. No basketball players, male or female, were involved.

3. The NCAA has not set foot on campus, although our compliance officers did fly up there this week to give a “status report” on the internal investigation.

4. The entire investigation actually centers around another sport at Alabama, and I’m giving very good odds right now that it will be the baseball team…due to all the goofy partial scholarship juggling that goes on in that sport.

5. Unless the total number of “violators” reaches 50 athletes or more, and/or the number of athletic teams involved reaches 8 or more, nothing is going to happen probation-wise.

Now back to our regularly scheduled ironic remarks, trash-talking, and commentary

Queue inane rant about Saban from TAFKAOSU in three… two… one…

Georgia Tech apologizes to fellow football fans living in ATL who attended last night and invite you all to return when we play Clemson or FSU or something. Shit that was sad. Three fucking points?

I love that Alabama flew to Indianapolis to try and get players eligible to play this weekend. It reeks of desperation.

so 50 is the new 5 at Alabama…

That was wonderful, guys. Orson, you even made your voice sound a little like Philip Oakey’s.

(Before anyone starts giving me demerits, no, I had to look it up on Wikipedia. I mean, I loves the ‘80s pop cheese, but I’m not THAT ghey.)

Seriously one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time. Great, great work, guys.
We need a tutorial on doing stuff like that over at my site, 3rdsaturdayinblogtober.wordpress.com

1. 16 A loss to the Dawgs is not out of the question – SEC teams are playing great this year coming off the bye – ala MSU next weekend.

I don’t suppose there’s any way to train the real Mike VI to lipsynch like his picture in this masterpiece? That would be truly splendid.

45:

You mean desperation, like claiming that the athletics department had no control over the Brad Lester situation, and that they would let the proper academic committee make its decision? Of course, immediately after getting Croomed, that tune changed a little. Academic integrity, yes sir indeed.

EDSBS cliche multiple choice:

A) Slow clap.
B) Wow. Just wow.
C) I just threw up in my mouth a little bit
D) You owe me a new monitor
E) Where is my cheesecake, motherfucker?

As much as I despise this option, the only cliche choice here is E.

Brilliant.

Mike kind of looked sad, though. Harem not performing?

B O’B—

you forgot one:
f)+100 cocktails

AWY, thanks. How could I forget that one? Blasphemy. Grudgingly, I will stick with my answer.

Erik- you douche, just wait till Nov 24th barner

Come again when we’ve made some ahem “adjustments”.

The Flats can light up when Hamilton and Godsey were slinging the ball around.

GT Football: It’s Chan-tastic!

Lame.
you sing like a true Gayturd!

Cheesecake Dept

1. and #53: I think EDSBS has gone the “uppity” route and is trying to build street cred with the “mainstream on-line sports industrial complex” and is refusing to highlight the babes with nice shiny assess. RATS!

(Either that or Stranko is as whipped as Swindle now, which is more whipped than I originally thought.)

1,000,000,000 cocktails to me!

PKA PSU crap:

Apparently, the OSU fans that were getting drilled were Pike’s like most of the PSU fans and they were invited there? How $h!tty is that?! Invite the OSU Pikes over and then peg them with beer cans.
Second, Mr. Mouth and the lead villain was from Pitt, but the PSU Pikes turned on him too and IDed him to police.
What a bunch of effin’ idiots?!
I hope the get served, but from what the police said, it looks like minor stuff at best.

Good for Erik, whose “goal is to satisfy the working public’s unquenchable thirst for sports enlightenment.”

Judging from the inanity, that’s likely all that’s getting satisfied there in Plains…farm animals excluded natch.

LSU-Bama predictions, anyone?

As much as I’d like to see LSU win and keep the SEC’s MNC hopes alive, I have a gut feeling Bama’s gonna win in what will become a classic. Watch for insufferable Bammers clogging up the EDSBS internets and ebays immediately afterward.

If this happens, all of my anti-Big 10 hopes are going to rest on the shoulders of KU and/or BC. Yes, I just threw up a little.

actually, just KU or BC; they can’t both play tOSU.

#38

Tim, don’t mistake last year’s WVU defense with this year’s WVU defense. Light years my friend, light years.

Besides, the expectations of Bennett grew because he reaped the benefits of throwing the ball up to Calvin Johnson every other play in the Gator Bowl. Hell, had Reggie Ball done that his entire career, he’d have been a first round draft pick.

61: LSU will win easily and show that Saban and ’Bama are frauds that have gotten lucky lately.

Should be an awesome game.
Less better have his khaki’s pulled up extra high and shirt tucked extra tight for this one.

Roll Tide..see ya in T-town bitches.

We need to make this a priority. You can vote once per day per IP address.

http://2007.weblogawards.org/polls/best-sports-blog-1.php

It would have been more effective if Bob Goulet had done the signing! Just sayin’

61:

I’ll be the first to say I have no idea on this game. My biggest hope is that Alabama doesn’t get run out of the stadium.

If LSU sticks to the run and doesn’t cough it up, I think we lose. Why UT stopped running I don’t know, because Bama’s D couldn’t stop it. If they air it out, I think our secondary is good enough to force a TO, maybe 2.

If Terry Grant can run, I think we have a much better shot, but I don’t think he’ll be able to. JP and DJ et al are gonna have to torch LSU to give TG some running room. FSU’s defense is prob the best we’ve seen yet, and that’s not a good sign.

Alabama will have to play their best game and get some help.

All that being said, I think Bama will at least cover. If Leslie kicks to Javy, that could be the difference maker.

I’m most excited to see what blitz packages have been installed with the off week.

I think there are three key matchups:

(1) Early Doucet and (a) Kareem Jackson or (b) Lionel Mitchell

(2) Justin Britt / Evan Cardwell and Glen Dorsey

(3) DJ Hall and whoever happens to be covering him on any given play

And (2) should include B.J. Stabler

Actually I don’t know if I’d go to a GT/Clemson game at Bobby Dodd. The point totals of the last two games there between these teams have been 16 and 19.

Did anyone read the AJC story about the stolen jerseys? A Nike rep was there to give them orange swooshes and make sure the Russell logo got blacked out.

I can see the Nike rep— dressed in a dri-fit business suit with two different colored sleeves and a tire-tread pattern on the pants— frantically searching through his briefcase, which contains over 500 colors of swooshes, trying to find the right ones.

And would Russell have a claim against Nike for passing off Russell’s uniforms as their own? Discuss. (45 mins)

Baghuan: EDSBS is running in third place right now.

i think alabama might get burned on screens and delayed runs, I hope the defense doesn’t come out too aggressive

The other sport in question at Bama is women’s track and it’s EVERY member of that team. The football players learned about how to do it from one of them. There may be a couple of random players from other sports.

Gonna be a rough week next week for us Aubies…

Bama 21 LSU 17

Damn me! Damn me!

You’re still going on probation! So blahhhh….

Probation Nation!

Pumpkin, are you serious?

I would have bet it was going to be the baseball team.

See! Even Bama’s women cheat at sports!

kt,

I usually enjoy your posts (as much as possible) but where is all this probation stuff coming from? I only see it posted on Aubie message boards.

If some asshole in the AD is leaking info to aubies, that’s really going to piss me off.

Chris King is a douche, btw. At least that’s the rumor

Thanks Tater, same here.

Some folks are adamant about the whole deal, but there is a lot of unknowns.

Someone smarter than I please educate me (and this is applicable to any school):

Say for instance, something like this happens and it is primarily around one minor sport, i.e. track, and there is just one or two students from the major sports, football or basketball. How would it adversly effect the football or basketball programs? I understand that there is an orgizational control issue but the football program would not get slammed with scholly reductions or anything because the track team committed major infractions, would they?

Thanks in advance.

tater – does that make EDSBS a barner forum?

The investigation watch started almost as soon as Saban started at UA,T, when he went to Looziana recruiting at a high school with a former LSU player or two in his entourage. It’s a violation of some sort somehow, i think to do with who can go on recruiting trips.

There were a few other whispers of stuff and then the allegations in Miami accidentally divulged by HS players who told local media all about their conversations with St. Nick Saban the Savior, Bless His Holy Name, during a period where he’s basically allowed to say ‘Hello, young man, I’ll be back to talk to you when the NCAA allows me to have more contact with you."

And UA,T’s fingerprints are all over grade changing scandals at Hoover High School, which is not directly related to St. Nick Saban, Bless His Holy Name, but directly related to the football program.

There’s lots of stuff out there. These three are all media reported. Much repeated on AU boards, LSU boards and various Miami/The U/FSU/USF sites, but all originating from legit media sources.

I’m serious… my understanding is that no player received money, though… the deal was they got extra books for their friends, but all the books were turned back in as they should have been.

I don’t “officially” know how they did it, but the theory is that they enrolled for those classes, gave their friends the books, dropped the classes, but waited until the end of the semester to turn them back in. It seems the SUPe store doesn’t check mid-semester to see if athletes dropped a course.

Whether or not there’s going to be any phone call or visit restrictions coming from the stuff that allegedly happened in the spring, I don’t know.

But you Aubies can shut the F**k up already about Hoover. There’s no more Alabama wrongdoing there than there was Auburn wrongdoing in Mobile. That’s an exceedingly dead horse.

The Bama beat writers aren’t excactly sunshine pumping on this either. Crimson Chatter, Rap Sheet, etc…

http://www.al.com/blogs/

WE-

Doesn’t make edsbs a barner forum, but the only talk on here about bama and probation is from aubies.

Never heard of CNS recruiting with former LSU players. It’s definitely a violation. I think I remember something about Ole Miss and Deuce McAllister.

The Miami stuff was stupid of CNS, but I doubt whether other coaches who recruit say “Hello, I’m Coach X, but I can’t talk to you now.” Don’t think that would be that big of a deal if reported, which I think it was.

As far as I understand, Chapman has been cleared to play by the NCAA. As far as I know, that’s the only Alabama player related to any grade changing at Hoover. However, I think it was an 89.5 rounded to a 90 for eligibility purposes. I would think at most high schools, if a kid was facing not going to college for free because of 0.5, it would prob be changed. Doesn’t make it right, but it seems like more of an internal matter at Hoover.

All that being said, it would be nice of all the aubies got on the same page as to what the alleged PLoI involves, instead of throwing shit out to see what sticks. Hopefully nothing serious sticks

kt, they’re reporting the meeting everyone knows about, where Mal pitched a 4-game suspension for the football players… I don’t see anything else in there about other issues, though.

Will Bryant-Denny be louder then the 2005 Florida game? I think it might be. The only sound one might hear when LSU has the ball besides the crowd will be the faint whirl of the crazies running through Les Miles head.

bamafan,

I think it will be close to as loud as UF ‘05. The big difference is LSU is likely bringing a few thousand more into BDS than UF did. Also, in the UF game, most people didn’t think we had a shot, and we got up early and we got up big. The crowd was really loose. They might be tighter for this game. Here’s hoping they’re not

Oh, and bamafan, I think the sound of crazies running through Lester’s head is anything but faint…

I like EDSBS threads a lot better when they’re filled with witty pop culture references, inside jokes, and anything in Orgeron-speak. I don’t even mind Bama-Auburn threadacks, but really, no one gives a shit about recruiting violations.

I’d venture to say that half of the football players in the SEC were either illegally contacted or paid by the school (or boosters) for which they now play. Does it make a school dirty? Yes, but that’s just the way it goes in major D1 football.

PW-

Agreed. I think Orson has made the point before that he views D1 college football as a sort of minor league football.

Tiders, you’re projecting. Did I push your buttons?

Cecil Hurt likes to eat poop.

pun’kinhead, I like when people get angry – let’s me know I hit a nerve. lol.

and, Tater, it wasn’t a simple rounding issue. The 89 was the final grade. The kid, an AU verbal commit, was ineligible and it was a done deal. After UA,T official called an official at the school, it was changed to 90 by ‘mistakenly’ averaging the first semester grade with the final grade.

Duh.

The final grade is already averaged.

Very, very lame and very, very improbable. It does, however, allow people to claim “They just rounded a grade, no big deal.”

The difference between Hoover and Mobile is that there is no connection between AU and Mobile officials. That and it’s been ruled a non-issue already by the NCAA.

Tater, I have no idea about any alleged PLOI. I will surely find out more though.

War Eagle,
I’ve read the entire 90 page report in the situation.

The only, ONLY contact Alabama had with Hoover, is when they had a kid who they had, who they were told that he was eligible. They got one report where he had one set of grades that was his final transcript, Kevin Steele called and asked what the deal was, they told him that they had made a mistake, and sent over the “fixed” grades.

The blame was on Hoover’s end. If Alabama had that much power to get kids passed, then Kerry Murphy would be playing for them right now. They want to get as many kids on D1 scholarships so they can recruit talent to their football program (Hoover). That’s their goal. That’s why they have been changing grades and shit like that.

Don’t try and turn it into anything it isn’t. It isn’t like Tubby is running a crystal clean program over there, with the Irons brothers (I got a fuck midget in this suitcase!) and Cadillac Williams being shining examples of recent graduates from the football program.

Sociology degrees for everyone!

Hey Erik, you know what else reeks of desperation?
Anything related to Ole Miss…ya’ll spent so much time bitching about the correct call being made in the UA/OM game, that you forgot to pay attention to Arkansas..

damn, UA and AU totally hijacked this thread

Orson Swindle sings! I wanna party with you cowboy!

Take it easy on Erik. This is the only place he can get his opinion heard. Cause’ I’m sure as shit nobody’s reading it on HIS website.

“Gotta stop that inside trout!”

Has James Brooks learned to read yet?

Ramma’ Jamma’, here comes “Yellow Mama”. I know it needs more work, but it’s a start. Seems like I see a whole bunch of smoke, something must be on fire. How much is Saban’s buyout?

“Hoover High”, Gosh that could have many meanings. Not to be confused with a " Hoover Low". Which , I think, is just starting to raise it’s cute little head.