LES MILES BRAIN X-RAYED.

Funnily enough, Hrothgar was one of the names that I suggested for our first child. Along with Humberto. I was promptly dismissed from the name selection committee.

Oh, and Les Miles is my new coaching hero. Facts? Data? Fuck that, man, go for the kill.

balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls

Maybe I am simple, but Les Miles has seemed more dumb and reckless than brave or whatever in the last three games. He could easily be 0-3, instead of 2-3. Soon, his river boat gambling style will come up snake eyes, and if it happens with the Saban-ites, we will never hear the end of it…..

I always pictured his cranium filling out that entire hat…like it was all he could do to fit it over his testicle toting skull.

I think people are making too much of this play being “ballsy”, though. Unless that pass is intercepted, he still has time to kick the FG. He was taking one last shot at certain victory before placing his season in the hands of a semi-reliable kicker.

Sounds like good coaching to me.

the hat was a nice touch, though I’m a bit concerned about his lack of a skeleton below the first few vertebrae

soon the name Les Miles will become synonymous with inept and inane risk taking…

i.e. – “… so I’m in Atlantic City, see, and walking in a neighborhood that looks a bit scary,okay? And this lady comes up to me and says ‘wanny have some fun for $20?’ and I am thinking yeah, the doc said I was gonna die of liver cancer in a month, so why not pull a Les Miles today?”

I, personally, won’t be shit talking no matter who we beat. I’m just proud that we’re competitive again and have competent people. I have never called anyone celebrating after a victory.

what #2 said.

Beowulf was the only piece of “literature” I ever thought was worth a damn.

Generally, I prefer to use the term as in:
“****, I just stepped in a pile of literature”

#5:

only if the story ends,
“and it was that $20 hooker that magically cured the liver cancer”.

So now the 60 year old pervs that sneak around outside the library can go up to a window and hang some Les Miles…

Trogdor approves this post and cannot wait to see Miles sworded in the SEC championship game.

I believe this is applicable to the Legend of the Insane Les Miles:
Mark May:
Hey, man, you don’t talk to Les Miles. You listen to him. The man’s enlarged my mind. He’s a poet-warrior in the classic sense. I mean sometimes he’ll… uh… well, you’ll say “hello” to him, right? And he’ll just walk right by you. He won’t even notice you. And suddenly he’ll grab you, and he’ll throw you in a corner, and he’ll say, “do you know that ‘if’ is the middle word in life? If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you”… I mean I’m no, I can’t… I’m a little man, I’m a little man, he’s… he’s a great man. I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across floors of silent seas…

And as he ran off the field at the final gun, Les was heard to say, “Stay Thirsty, My Friends”.

Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Private Joker is silly and ignorant, but he’s got guts. And guts is enough.

Those aren’t testicles, it’s merely two conjoined whoopie cushions. Appropriate for a man with shit for brains. And what does it say that in the grey matter-challenged SEC this cud-chewing halfwit manages to outcoach the likes of Pope Urban the Pious and Tommy Tubertwit?

god dammit!!!

i meant what #3 said.

1. - the liver cancer isn’t such a big deal once you get aids.

Bravo Pelican Pants.

I’m exposing myself as an uber-nerd here, but this is the Noriko Takaya School of Coaching: Hard Work and Guts!

Aim for the Top!

Please tell me how in the world LSU is still in the running for the BCS. With 3 consecutive terrible games capped by lucky wins in 2 of them (both at home), they are much more suspect than any of the top 10 teams incuding Boston College. Very overrated…

PW: You don’t need a calcium skeleton if you’ve got testosterone at sufficiently high pressure to provide hydraulic endo-skeletal support.

Some more Les Miles quotable quotes:
What do you call retards who accuse retards? I’ve seen horrors… horrors that you’ve seen. But you have no right to call me insane. You have a right to try to beat me. You have a right to do that… but you have no right to judge me. It’s impossible for words to describe what is necessary to those who do not know what horror means. Horror. Horror has a face… and you must make a friend of horror. Horror and moral terror are your friends. If they are not then they are enemies to be feared. They are truly enemies. I remember when I was with the Michigan coaching staff. Seems a thousand centuries ago. We went to an Ohio high school to recruit some football players, and pass out some “Go Big Blue!” removable tattoos. We left the high school after we had gave away the tattoos to the players, and this Coach came running after us and he was crying, madly. We went back there and the Ohio State coaching staff had come and hacked off every tattooed arm. There they were in a pile. A pile of tattooed arms. And I remember… I… I… I cried. I wept like some grandmother. I wanted to tear my teeth out. I didn’t know what I wanted to do. And I want to remember it. I never want to forget it. I never want to forget. And then I realized… like I was shot… like I was shot with a diamond… a diamond bullet right through my forehead. And I thought: My God… the genius of that. The genius. The will to do that. Perfect, genuine, complete, crystalline, pure. And then I realized they were stronger than we. Because they could stand that these were not monsters. These were men… trained cadres. These men who fought with their hearts, who had families, who had children, who were filled with love… but they had the strength… the strength… to do that. If I had ten divisions of those men our troubles here would be over very quickly. You have to have men who are moral… and at the same time who are able to utilize their primordial instincts to kill without feeling… without passion… without judgment… without judgment. Because it’s judgment that defeats us..
… I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That’s my dream. That’s my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight… razor… and surviving

This describes Les Miles’ mentality as of late perfectly:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9mKMJVxrk0

#13

+1, Apocalypse Now reference…brilliant!

After watching the LSU-Auburn ending, I had only seen that kind of insanity once in my life, and it was in the form of Col. Kurtz in Apacolypse Now, and that character seemed to sum up Les Miles perfectly, or at least its where Les Miles is headed…….a snail on a straight razor….sums up his season so far, could get far crazier before its all over, may take him to the BCS championship, and it may cost him while he is in it…..

I am Les’s inlarged ego.
I will kill him one day.

Taf-fy?

+ 100 cocktails to Pelican Pants.

I’m calling Miles an idiot savant until further notice, despite it blowing up in his face against Kentucky. Rash and foolhardy looks real good with one loss in this fucked up year of college football.

It takes brass brains to coach SEC football.

Dennis Fuckin Hopper made that movie…somehow if you could blend his character and with Marlon Brando’s, I think you would have an idea of what its like to be Les Miles.

 Hell Charles Manson called after the Lsu-Auburn game and said Les Miles is fuckin nuts……

Are those balls or mini corndogs? Mmm, corndogs.

fucking Les Miles

fucking squib kick

fuckity fuck fuck

Re #16, it is amazing that Les Miles has been able to coach those lovable, overachieving scappers from LSU to narrow victories over Florida and Auburn, relying on nothing more than superior talent, more experience, multiple 4th down conversions, generous officiating decisions, and the greatest HFA in college football.

Come to think of it, maybe it’s the SEC hater that comes out as grey matter challenged in this discussion.

I would say Les Miles is more Leeroy Jenkins than Col. Kurtz. And at least he has plenty of chicken.

“It’s such a fine line between stupid, and clever”-Les Miles daily affirmation, says it 5 times upon awakening and 5 times before going to bed….or

“I’ve wrestled with reality for thirty-five years, and I’m happy, Doctor, I finally won out over it….or

  “I am Mata Hari, my own master.” or

The greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world he didn’t exist…

I get it now! So THAT’s why he always wears a “ballcap” on the sideline!

Not buying it 34. Now that even the veneratable ole ball coach was bested at Stratego by the head coach at Vanderbilt (and yes, I don’t even know the fuck’s name) tells me that grey matter is indeed in short supply in the SEC. Given that Spurrier was one of the few who could walk and chew taffy at the same time.

Hey Sherlock, if Vandy, a conference opponent (who almost beat UGA recently) beating USCe means the SEC sucks, what does Michigan losing to a I-AA App State team (who now has two losses) and Minnesota losing to a team that is entering I-AA THIS YEAR mean about the Big Televen?

#21

Ron Zook.

Is Les good or just plain lucky? This is three in a row that have come down to the wire. LUCKILY we got two of them. Will we be so LUCKY against Nick Satan and the Alabama boys? Not if we don’t come in with a vengeance and strike early, take a good lead and keep it. This come from behind stuff is going to leave LSU in the dust of someone else’s national championship if the lines don’t stand firm and the penalties don’t stop. Les may have called some gutsy plays, but he wouldn’t need them if we didn’t get behind and stay behind until the end. LSU is a GREAT team and it is time for them to start playing like one. The initial games are easy and we look super, but now it is the tough SEC teams and we need to rise to the occasion and win not play catch up. Come one Tigers let’s chew Alamaba up before they know what hit them. We all want to see you guys win the national championship so let’s attack these last four games.

@ #36

Love the Usual Suspects… I do think that #13 was your best post, IMHO.

Roll Tide.

I’m curious why everyone thinks this is so insanely ballsy. They left it a little closer than necessary, sure, but there would have been time for the FG try after (at least two extra seconds ticked off after the catch). Why take one shot at the win when you could have two? If they can see that it’s man-to-man coverage, why not go for it all?

Miles= stark-raving genius. Should have been 3 or 4 seconds on the clock. Not sure why Tuberville didn’t throw a fit asking for time on the clock.

I don’t think this can be screamed enough: In conference competition does not indicate how good the conference is. It only indicates relative talent.

The average team in a conference will have a .500 record, so if you want to compare conferences, you have to look at OOC record. And the SEC has that in spades.

Also, Appy State and SDSU.

First of all, the ballsy call wasn’t that ballsy. It was the right call given the kicker and the clock — don’t be fooled by shoddy analysis by the guys in the booth. Second, if Less is college football’s George Bush, then something needs to be said about Urban Meyer failing to call a quick time out to preserve an extera 29 seconds at the end of the game and Tubberville pooching it to LSU’s upman with a minute and a half left to play and only up by 1. For goodness sakes, why not just launch one out of bounds if you don’t want it returned. Those were two istances of terrible coaching that may have cost both teams wins. As it stands, however, LSU is still a 3rd ranked, 1 loss team with a bye week to try and regain the precision they had at the beginning of the year when they were laying waste to Va Tech. If they beat Alabama next week, they should be able to rest up through the 3 remaining scrimmages before the SEC Championship and bowl game — and by the way, Less has a pretty good record in bowl games.

Is Les Miles hat bolted to his head?Really he seems like he is just going for broke no matter what ..like what the heck he’s going to be coaching at Michigan next year anyway.