TEN REASONS TO WATCH USF AT RUTGERS
by Orson on Oct 18, 2007 5:16 PM EDT
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PrintThe game matters and features the number two team in the nation and it's bed-jumping maniac of a coach versus last year's Big East insurrector, Rutgers. But those are logical reasons you'd watch the game. You'd watch the game anyway, eyeslut, even if it were UTEP squaring off in an exhibition game versus a bullring filled with excitable live panthers live from Cartagena.
Ten reasons the true devotee might watch the game tonight between USF and Rutgers:
10. Count the number of Sopranos references. Without Gandolfini sighting, over/under stands at 8; with a Gandolfini sighting, over/under spikes to 15.
9. Cringe as you listen to the wind rip across the second most endangered forest in the world, the exotic and irreplaceable fibers of Jim Leavitt's vocal cords. When it fails, he will communicate via a Stephen Hawking voice box hooked up to a bullhorn. BLOCK OUT AND TACKLE YOU FUCKING FUCK ARRRGGGHHHH [/Hawking}
8. To see if Singlet Guy dare cross into Jersey wearing the immortal singlet and cape, and if he is allowed to leave the state alive with it.
7. Ray Rice ran on the South Florida defense for 200 yards last year at USF, so intrepid gamblers can wager on him easily doubling that in front of a friendly home crowd. Free advice, friends: 400 yards!!! We won't even charge for it! Wagering is fun!
6. Matt Grothe will do something jaw-droppingly dumb immediately following praise from announcers. Another rule of the universe fulfilled in front of your very eyes.
5. Chris Fowler will leap from the booth in suicidal glee at his final escape from Flutie and James before landing harmlessly on a hot dog vendor's pile of buns and being forced after the "equipment failure" to do the next Thursday's game with...Craig James and Doug Flutie. Look in his eyes, viewer--those are the dead eyes of mad despair.
4. Marvel at the misplaced mascot that is the Scarlet Knight: with six huge, gray, plaque-encrusted teeth, he really should be not the Garden State's mascot, but West Virginia's, instead.
See? Six huge teeth.
3. Bulls kicker Delbert Alvarado is 7-12 on the season, which should be good, clean fun for everyone concerned...especially if ESPN's field mike gets really close to Jim Leavitt, with or without the Steven Hawking voicebox. I WILL RIP YOUR LEGS OFF AND BEAT YOU TO PUDDING ALVARADO GARRRGGGG [/hawking]
2. Continue to struggle to come up with a proper comparison for Matt Grothe's unique visage. We're going with the love child of frequently mentioned blog-idol Charles Bronson and an African Bird Eating Toad.
1. Pray for USF's sake that their newest, most vocal fan doesn't have the same win-depleting effect she had on her alma mater. Another rule of cosmic law: the more her team loses, the bigger her boobs get!
USF, welcome to the loss column. Don't blame us. Blame the Sterger curse.
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Two Boobs:
1) Jenn looks pretty good – am I am nuts?, And
2) Is Holthhh calling this game?
by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Oct 18, 2007 5:26 PM EDT reply actions
Somebody tell Pre-Excursion head crushing incident Phil Leotardo that Singlet Guy is married to his cousin.
by Out of Conference on Oct 18, 2007 5:26 PM EDT reply actions
Fuck y’all. Cute face + big boobs + Hooters-thin tank top = good clean fun for all involved.
by Doug on Oct 18, 2007 5:33 PM EDT reply actions
She sort of appears to be surveying the land…like she’s ready to conquer the RayJay turf, using only her boobs as her preferred instruments of death.
What a way to go.
by Gentleman Masher on Oct 18, 2007 5:34 PM EDT reply actions
15,000 young red-blooded American men just signed up to transfer from Florida State next semester.
by Allahver Fist on Oct 18, 2007 5:36 PM EDT reply actions
None of you are crazy. Shit yes she looks good. We’ve been over this many times before. All these guys who come on here and bash her likely have never had anything that hot. Hell…I’d hit it twice.
by The Last Dragon on Oct 18, 2007 5:36 PM EDT reply actions
Never. Not if she coughed up doubloons with each thrust. Ne. Ver.
by Orson Swindle on Oct 18, 2007 5:38 PM EDT reply actions
I’d like to see what would happen if Redneck Drunk Guy or Windmill Arm Camo Guy tried to use the ol’ reacharound double hand bra maneuver on Jennnnnn. Would she even feel a thing?
by Raider Red on Oct 18, 2007 5:41 PM EDT reply actions
This is one of the better pics of Sterger out there, she looks like a hot college girl instead of a gussied up cowgirl ho.
by John on Oct 18, 2007 5:41 PM EDT reply actions
Love the shocker in the first pic. The 6th grader in me can never get enough of it.
by tx78756 on Oct 18, 2007 5:43 PM EDT reply actions
I’d hit it….with a werewolf that has a chainsaw for a dick.
by Brandon Cox's Vagina on Oct 18, 2007 5:44 PM EDT reply actions
It’d be a hate poundin’ but a poundin’ nonetheless.
::marriedguybstalkoff::
by Irwin Fletcher on Oct 18, 2007 5:53 PM EDT reply actions
I’m not sure how many doubloons I’d get before it was over.
by PW on Oct 18, 2007 5:59 PM EDT reply actions
I’d think of it this way . . . it’s a plague that lives between her legs. And also, why exactly is she famous? You can find a similar set of tits in a tight shirt at any college game. Was she just fucking the guys who ran the cameras at USF and blowing the guys at SI so she could get a nice bloggie that she writes*.
Hot as she may be . . . she’s a hallway guys, and you all are throwing the imaginary hotdog down the hallway.
*=and by write, I mean says something mundane and stupid and some intern then translates into a blog via ghost writing.
by The Bull-Gator on Oct 18, 2007 6:04 PM EDT reply actions
2 in the pink. 1 in the stink.
by Bobby Lowder's Checkbook on Oct 18, 2007 6:07 PM EDT reply actions
In reference to my earlier post, I meant to say FSU as opposed to USF.
Damn Repus program
by The Bull-Gator on Oct 18, 2007 6:08 PM EDT reply actions
Now Orson, with all the beautiful ladies in the great Sunshine state you could have posed at the end of this post, you had to toss in one that makes us flip either one way or the other…. how about just posting normal healthy tanned cheesecake unknown to us all so we may imagine her in the wonderful way we think of all the other unknown ladies in the world?
also… can transitive herpes be caught through TV cameras? I think ND was on TV earlier this year
by Futbawl Fan on Oct 18, 2007 6:14 PM EDT reply actions
Wow, the singlet guy is getting more action than Jenn…amazin’….
by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Oct 18, 2007 6:16 PM EDT reply actions
@ 15
I was going to guess some or all varieties of hepatitus (a/b/c/d/e ad infinitum).
Not that it would stop me.
by bitterhorn on Oct 18, 2007 6:24 PM EDT reply actions
I will not attempt to attack her hotness, however, isn’t this picture reminiscent of the USC cheerleader picture? Look at all the USF fans around her. Look at the look of utter disgust on their faces, they are not happy with what is taking place on the field at all. Yet Sterger remains as busty and calm as a Hindu cow! She cares not for USF! She is the worst kind of fan, a Johnny-come-lately who doesn’t even understand what is going on in front of her!
by JB on Oct 18, 2007 6:31 PM EDT reply actions
so you just couldn’t NOT make a WV-tooth joke.
I am sending Chuck Norris to your house. He will pluck out your eyeballs and send one each to Mangino and Friedgen as appetizers. He may do as he wishes with your women and your cats.
by wvjgrad69 on Oct 18, 2007 6:36 PM EDT reply actions
JB: Jenn went to South Florida for two years. And, she was the drum major of her high school. What does that say about band people?
I think she knows something about football. Her pleased look? Have no idea why, but ladies are tough to read most of the time.
by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Oct 18, 2007 6:40 PM EDT reply actions
If she went to USF than that might entitle her to a little bit of a pass. But if she shows up to any future FSU vs. USF game wearing a half ’n half tank top I swear to god I will continue ogling all the same!
by JB on Oct 18, 2007 6:43 PM EDT reply actions
Fuck the shocker. Try the minivan. Two in front, three in back.
I’ve never done it, but if you have, details please…details.
by bhors on Oct 18, 2007 7:07 PM EDT reply actions
How could you forget the reason why I’m tuning in: Lou’s pep talk. Best 90 seconds of television.
Tonight, thousands of college students are going to get drunk out of their minds, and it will all be my fault.
http://digitalheadbutt.wordpress.com/2007/10/11/the-lou-holtz-pep-talk-drinking-game/
by Digital Headbutt on Oct 18, 2007 7:08 PM EDT reply actions
Fowler just refered to Grothe as the quarterback of a USFL team…
I’m sure the’re better paid then that.
by sckego on Oct 18, 2007 7:36 PM EDT reply actions
In all fairness, I heard her on Dan Sileo this morning and she seemed to be pretty cool and seemed to know her stuff. Sileo, on the other hand, is a huge cocksucker and is only surpassed on the sports talk radio shittiness scale by local Tallahassee personality Jeff Cameron, who basically just rips off ALL of the jokes Jim Rome made earlier in the day.
by PW on Oct 18, 2007 7:41 PM EDT reply actions
In fairness, that smile could easily be the smile of frustrated disgust.
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 7:47 PM EDT reply actions
#32
Instead of coming up with all those rules, you can condense it into one rule that is a lot safer because there’s going to be a lot less liquor drunk:
Rule 1: Chug the whole damn bottle of liquor.
by Will on Oct 18, 2007 7:55 PM EDT reply actions
Are all those guys throwing their hands up in disgust, or is it some new stupid arm/hand signal for USF? It kind of looks like bull horns, maybe.
The last thing this state needs is another gay arm/hand motion for a college football team.
by Tim on Oct 18, 2007 8:00 PM EDT reply actions
Regarding Jenn Sterger: this is the same group of people that will snipe a girl in a picture 20 rows away or half cut out of the frame, desperately filling in the details with their minds. Of course she is going to have some fans!
Looks like a normal girl with a large rack to me. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
by Tim on Oct 18, 2007 8:10 PM EDT reply actions
Screw the bulls—McGuffie’s on the duece! Is it wrong to name a child after him before he gets to Michigan?
by Zone Left on Oct 18, 2007 8:17 PM EDT reply actions
Screw the bulls—McGuffie’s on the deuce! Is it wrong to name a child after him before he gets to Michigan?
by Zone Left on Oct 18, 2007 8:17 PM EDT reply actions
On a completely different subject, what’s with the officials’ pink whistles?
Big East Football, we’re thuper thankth for athking!
by Lars on Oct 18, 2007 9:05 PM EDT reply actions
Lars, October is breast cancer awareness month & pink is the color of that cause.
by Middle America on Oct 18, 2007 9:13 PM EDT reply actions
#38’s right, it does look like some kind of mentally handicapped gesture.
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 9:20 PM EDT reply actions
We cannot stop laughing at the field goal block return USF just tried to pull off by tossing the ball forward on each tackle. Cheating on an Italian soccer level. Rapido, Bulls! Rapido!
by Orson Swindle on Oct 18, 2007 9:24 PM EDT reply actions
Any man who can shove a ball that fall forward in pursuit of scoring is OK in my book.
by Brandon Cox's Vagina on Oct 18, 2007 9:41 PM EDT reply actions
Can’t a minivan hold more than 3 in the back? That one’s just stupid.
by PW on Oct 18, 2007 9:44 PM EDT reply actions
[Cartman] ENOUGH WITH THIS BASEBALL BULLSHIT…I WANT MY PEP TALK GADAMIT!!! [/Cartman]
by Raider Red on Oct 18, 2007 9:47 PM EDT reply actions
This game is freaky and no one can say “USF”…it’s too weird…their uniforms look like bad USFL unis…
by jamiedawgfan on Oct 18, 2007 10:23 PM EDT reply actions
Geez… Rutgers is pulling out all the stops tonight.
by The Big Dog on Oct 18, 2007 10:30 PM EDT reply actions
When you’re close to the top, people are gonna thrown the kitchen sink at you. Well done, Rutgers.
by Boy Howdy on Oct 18, 2007 10:30 PM EDT reply actions
Trickery, knavery, dissembling, deceit. College football at its vindictive best.
by DC Trojan on Oct 18, 2007 10:33 PM EDT reply actions
It is a sad, sad day when we are denied the pep talk.
by Digital Headbutt on Oct 18, 2007 10:33 PM EDT reply actions
It would seem teams are doing all they can to avoid playing the Bucks for the MNC.
by Ted Ginn did Everythin' on Oct 18, 2007 10:40 PM EDT reply actions
#26
Exactly. None of those guys is giving her the time of day and one guy has his back to her like she just ripped a fart. I guess Jen will have to go to rehab in order to extend her 15 minutes.
And can someone help me with gang signs? What is that sign the guy behind singlet-guy is flashing? Is that “I’m a dumb white f*ck”?
by fotodog on Oct 18, 2007 10:48 PM EDT reply actions
#28, lady??? she’s no lady. I wouldn’t f*ck her with Bea Arthur’s dick. er, wait, maybe I would…
by damgator on Oct 18, 2007 10:57 PM EDT reply actions
I called this one a little while ago. When one team has a back that’s piled up a hundred yards before the half, and the other team doesn’t have OMG JOE MONTANA under center, the game is going to the rushers.
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 10:57 PM EDT reply actions
Yeah. I’m on my 6th or so beer and can say no matter how much BS I could spew about standards, self-respect, blah blah blah, I would totally nuzzle those if the chance came up….
Can we finally put to rest the USF thing? After watching these two pitiful teams look like a dog trying to get a ball out from under the couch just out of his reach?
I don’t give a crap what anyone says about OSU’s schedule to date, their defense would totally assrape either of these teams “offenses”, if you can call them that…if USF manages to come from 10 down to win this game against Rutgers, it should mean nothing…
Shame on you, Auburn and West Virginia…Shame on you…
by Pants McPants on Oct 18, 2007 11:02 PM EDT reply actions
When did Xavier Lee put on a Rutgers uniform?
by The Big Dog on Oct 18, 2007 11:13 PM EDT reply actions
I love tOSU fans mocking another teams offense. Jesus. Your defense might be good, but it’s tough to tell against your all-Ohio schedule.
by LouHoltzLithp on Oct 18, 2007 11:34 PM EDT reply actions
The chamber was loaded. BC, you’re in the chair next. Didi Mao!
(OSU is in the big ten. No bullets)
by Mr. Wrong on Oct 18, 2007 11:39 PM EDT reply actions
Huzzah! Another impostor falls. Still waiting for Arizona State to get some notice…
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 11:40 PM EDT reply actions
No more South Florida BS, please…..
by The Real Man of Genius on Oct 18, 2007 11:45 PM EDT reply actions
I will be sorely disappointed if the animated blogpoll does not somehow involve or reference bullfighting.
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 11:47 PM EDT reply actions
Ooh! Ooh! Especially since Rutger’s logo is big and red. This could definitely work.
by Erik on Oct 18, 2007 11:48 PM EDT reply actions
Thanks, Jen.
Grothe spiking the ball on 2nd and 22 sure helped. Anyone who really thought USF would play for a title should just go watch women’s soccer. Or Jen.
by BamaCPA on Oct 18, 2007 11:52 PM EDT reply actions
Does USF get to complain about having to play a tough Big East schedule because obviously their OOC schedule is easier.
3 top 5 teams have lost to unranked teams in conference play, in three different conferences.
Sure would be nice if SEC fans would just shut the fuck up about how tough their conference schedules are and just concede to the fact that conference play is tough on everyone.
by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 19, 2007 12:02 AM EDT reply actions
65
I thought we played well against a tough Washington team at their place – held them to the fewest points all season – USC and ASU held them to fewer yards though.
by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 19, 2007 12:09 AM EDT reply actions
Sure would be nice if you would just shut the fuck up in general.
by Mr. Wrong on Oct 19, 2007 12:09 AM EDT reply actions
Cool, if you will shut the fuck up about Alabama. Call it a truce.
Though the Big Ten has blown ass the past 2 seasons. The Big East was tough last season as well. Big East, Pac-10, and SEC probably best 3 conferences top to bottom. Big Ten and Big 12 will probably be back as well.
by bamafanintigerland on Oct 19, 2007 12:10 AM EDT reply actions
conference play is tough – even in the big 11.
USF was ranked too high – unlike those traditional powers:USC or tOSU. It took a few fluke weekends for the Bulls to go from unranked to the top. You know FOX, ESPN and the BSC were not happy seeing the Bulls #2.
Mark May talked about a douche bag coach that would (would have now) elected LSU of USF because of their 100 year history.
BSC & Polls are a joke. But what a fun year. Go whoever plays tOSU and BC. I want to see the BSC TILT sign light up.
by Bruce Dickinson on Oct 19, 2007 12:11 AM EDT reply actions
I think Saban just farted. You should probably research it.
by Mr. Wrong on Oct 19, 2007 12:15 AM EDT reply actions
#82
That fart clearly means that Saban hates it at Alabama. He has never farted at his previous coaching stops. And if he did fart it was because of either a: excellent fiber that he had no control over or b: someone else farted and he took credit for it.
by bamafanintigerland on Oct 19, 2007 12:20 AM EDT reply actions
Don’t forget- he has no fart-related buyout clause in his contract.
by Mr. Wrong on Oct 19, 2007 12:25 AM EDT reply actions
Can we please dispense with the notion that Jenn is a “new” USF fan? She went there for two years, FCS. She’s attended games there for the last three years and wrote about the Bulls in her SI articles last year.
Hell, every FSU fans knows that there hasn’t been a whole hell of a lot of bandwagons around Tally of late, and yet she still shows up. Let’s get rid of the notion that she’s on a bandwagon.
Now we can get on to more important things, like…..
OS put Jenn’s pic on a page that sponsored by Yum…. DISCUSS!!!
by Kevin @ Fanblogs on Oct 19, 2007 7:30 AM EDT reply actions
What do we have to do to get Jenn to Jacksonville wearing blue and orange?
by Hobnail_Boot on Oct 19, 2007 10:42 AM EDT reply actions
Hobnail boot, shut the fuck up. We have enough problems as is with our fucking Bradford-Levy-Gilchrist-Dixie county jorts, we don’t ever need this dumb whore bringing us down.
I love it. How disgusting were the fan bases at this game. Grothe’s dad. Jesus. Ew. You KNOW he doesn’t shop at Publix. Probably like Food Lion or Gooding’s. What trash.
by m on Oct 19, 2007 11:30 AM EDT reply actions
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