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Around SBN: Four TCU Football Players Among 17 Arrested In Drug Ring

CURIOUS INDEX, 10/18/07


Delays ironed out and the server is up and running. Caffeine and anger=not good, currently injecting self with thorazine to stabilize manic blogger. Bystanders: HORRIFIED.

I'm the coach of your team, whoever it is.

Dave Wannstedt does not know what team he coaches. This is the only logical conclusion one can come to reading these remarks from his press conference this week regarding Cincinnati's opportunistic defense this year and Pitt's defense's puzzling lack of turnovers created in 2007:

Hey, their (Cincy's) offense is doing great and scoring a lot of points, but it all ties together," Wannstedt said. "It truly does. You look at [their] game against Navy. "Navy turns it over three times and throws two interceptions in the end zone. Is that the difference in the game? Maybe. That's how we can help our offense, come up with some turnovers on defense."

Borrow some turnovers from another defense--it's an innovative strategy, one only a mind fresh from the NFL could possibly invent. College kochez r sooo stoopid!

Dress your best with Steve Spurrier. The State has their own Flash sensation going in the Steve Spurrier Fashion Review, complete with dressable doll and sound bites.

Florida State v. Miami will not be nationally televised for the first time since the Spanish Influenza was the hot fashion accessory of the day. Weep quietly for exactly three seconds, college football fan, and then stand in amazement that it took this long for tv types to realize both programs were suffering from serious structural problems. Also: the three Daves of Lincoln Financial, home of the $35.89 broadcast budget, get a crack at a sacred nailgun-fight of a game with Tennessee at Alabama.

The game will not be broadcast in HD, which has ruined our eyes for lesser video standards in football--what was once acceptable quality now looks like watching a game through a dirty aquarium. For making the purchase of a television that costs as much as a new car inevitable: fuck you, HD.

Who says you shouldn't jump into bed with young men? It's one of the tactics that's worked like mad for maddish USF coach Jim Leavitt.

"He was recruiting in the area, and he came in and jumped in my bed and was like, 'Get up, go lift weights!'" Jenkins said, laughing. "I thought, 'Oh God, I'm never going to get away from him.'"

If you're wondering what it's like spending the evening at the Swindle household and waking up on the air mattress, it is exactly like this, but with dogs and sirens involved.

Kentucky, you're going to get your ass kicked in one way: with dance. Derrick, the current Florida drum major, will slay you with his fourth-quarter rhythms. Seduce you first? Of course. Kill you afterwards? Well, really, after you've had Derrick, there's no one else you want or require.

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Comments

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Finally, maybe sanity will prevail.

Not in Pittsburgh though.

by Crabapple Buck on Oct 18, 2007 1:17 PM EDT reply actions  

This falls under the WATFO category:

Which of these games will be nationally televised b/c one of these teams is undefeated and the other beat a top five team recently?

A. Fla St./Miami
B. Bama/Tenn.
C. Aggy/Nebraska
D. Kansas/Colorado

100-1 at the start of the season for D. Guaran-damn-tee it.

by Raider Red on Oct 18, 2007 1:20 PM EDT reply actions  

“I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals FLAAAAAAMMING!”

by bitterhorn on Oct 18, 2007 1:21 PM EDT reply actions  

no soulja boy crankin’=shitty dancer.

he did have me thinking he was going to break out the sprinkler for a split second though.

by gerry dorsey on Oct 18, 2007 1:26 PM EDT reply actions  

Yeah, don’t insult the band members, or you get sexual references from O’s wife, defending those that perform at halftime.

Our band sucks (Clemson), and we get halftime passes so I always head out for beer and food, but I have found FSU’s, South Carolina’s, Georgia’s, and Carolina’s bands to be entertaining on the road.

by Coop on Oct 18, 2007 1:39 PM EDT reply actions  

I didn’t know Lamar from “Revenge of the Nerds” was still in school, much less at Florida!

by Jon on Oct 18, 2007 1:42 PM EDT reply actions  

Wannstedt – America’s Head Coach.

by Gentleman Masher on Oct 18, 2007 1:44 PM EDT reply actions  

Re: The Spurrier Dress Up Doll:

The give you the option of a Houndstooth hat?
Does “The State” even know who the OBC is?

Click, clack.

by GamecockTony on Oct 18, 2007 1:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Does the “F” stand for fag?
/HT to whoever had that comment first (was it EDSBSMD dude in that thread where the radio guys thought the Haley L – Les Miles story was accurate?)

by Out of Conference on Oct 18, 2007 1:51 PM EDT reply actions  

Gamecock Tony – evidently they let Ron Morris pick out the clothes and accessories for the Spurrier dress-up-doll.

by Out of Conference on Oct 18, 2007 1:52 PM EDT reply actions  

By the way, did the server hampster get into your stash of qualudes and Jack last night?

by GamecockTony on Oct 18, 2007 1:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Actually, Derrick will not be at the game. He’s been sick over the past few weeks and has had to spend time in the hospital (tonsils removed, then he began coughing up blood). We love you Derrick and we hope you get better!

by FLBandmember on Oct 18, 2007 1:53 PM EDT reply actions  

HORRIFIED? Or amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood?

by PeteJayhawk on Oct 18, 2007 1:54 PM EDT reply actions  

Lincoln Financial has HD cameras? If so, great news!

by Tim on Oct 18, 2007 1:58 PM EDT reply actions  

Crap, I knew it was too good to be true. The LF game will NOT be broadcast in HD. I fell asleep while reading that part I think.

by Tim on Oct 18, 2007 1:59 PM EDT reply actions  

I want to see him have a dance off with Georgia Tech’s flagboy

by 7-5 on Oct 18, 2007 2:00 PM EDT reply actions  

@ 705

Or a pillow fight with USF’s two Flaggetts.

by lance harbor on Oct 18, 2007 2:04 PM EDT reply actions  

@ OoC,

Or maybe Terry Chick is moonlighting over there.
Is he still doing local TV in Cola? And cocaine?

by GamecockTony on Oct 18, 2007 2:08 PM EDT reply actions  

I love how the Wannastache “watched football” on Saturday with a pen a paper to make sure he wasn’t too far off.

WTF does that guy do all week then???

by Odell 51 on Oct 18, 2007 2:08 PM EDT reply actions  

Ah, a Ron Morriss reference. It is good to be from South Carolina.

South Carolina fans believe that Morriss hates South Carolina, personally I just think he writes minutely antagonistic items about South Carolina to boost the circulation numbers, and Clemson fans think he is a USC homer, headquartered in Cola.

Obviously, Morriss must be doing his job correctly.

by Coop on Oct 18, 2007 2:09 PM EDT reply actions  

Ben, would it trouble you too much to participate in an online community before dropping your shameless linkwhore?

by Orson Swindle on Oct 18, 2007 2:16 PM EDT reply actions  

Yep, it’s a madness setting in time of the year, the time of the year I turn into a Rutgers & Florida fan.

by Southern Papa on Oct 18, 2007 2:17 PM EDT reply actions  

The Daves will start broadcasting in HD only after my late 80s VHS-C camcorder stops working for them every Saturday.

by Jerkwheat on Oct 18, 2007 2:21 PM EDT reply actions  

Gaytors, indeed.

Of course, this guy has nothing on Georgia Tech’s flag boy. Yeah he might be really ‘sweet’, but have you seen him twirl?!?

by Hobnail_Boot on Oct 18, 2007 2:24 PM EDT reply actions  

@ orson

genius. i was like who the hell is this guy?? i thought maybe i was crazy since nobody had called him out.

by gerry dorsey on Oct 18, 2007 2:25 PM EDT reply actions  

The drum major guy should look into touring as one of Janet Jackson’s dancers after college.

With those moves, he’s be too stifled in the office cube world most of us inhabit, and it could lead to some weird impromptu dancing at officer parties, where everyone nervously smiles before reaching for another drink.

by D-nice on Oct 18, 2007 2:27 PM EDT reply actions  

So, basically, Zwinky thinks it can show us a middle aged football coach rather than a voluptuous anonymous female and expect us to play ball? Ok, sure.

by Brian on Oct 18, 2007 2:28 PM EDT reply actions  

I feel like we let Orson down by not saying anything ourselves. Should we go over to his site and start some shit? Or should we just pretend he doesn’t exist, Tommy Kilborn-style?

by PW on Oct 18, 2007 2:29 PM EDT reply actions  

Oh, if you read the caption on the spurrier thing, its all clothing styles from other coaches.

So weve got the tressel vest, the hat, the paterno sneakers (i think) The Amato sunglasses, the Pete Carol Long sleeve Tee, etc…name em all and you get a prize.

by Brian on Oct 18, 2007 2:36 PM EDT reply actions  

I was under the impression that Lincoln Financial was just a couple of guys named Dave broadcasting through a webcam. Or perhaps a camera phone.

by Dr. StrangeCock on Oct 18, 2007 2:40 PM EDT reply actions  

Just realized something, Bama is 3-11 against Fulmer. Ouch.

by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 18, 2007 2:43 PM EDT reply actions  

the Saban “boy’s small” gray suit

the Weis full body wrap-around fanny pack

by PW on Oct 18, 2007 2:43 PM EDT reply actions  

PW, I agree with the latter. If we go over there, then it boosts his hits, and glorifies him. On the other hand, if we all put a post about him on our own pages, saying something like “Ben B. is a closet FSU fan, but hates Jenn Sterger”, or inserting your own insult as to his allegiances, sexual preference, taste in bourbon, etc, then that could send him to Google bomb hell.

by Southern Papa on Oct 18, 2007 2:46 PM EDT reply actions  

The Chan Gailey Pudding Holster.

by Brian on Oct 18, 2007 2:46 PM EDT reply actions  

Having been in Middle Tennessee’s band when we got flogged by UF a couple of years ago, I’ll say this about UF’s band……they suck donkey balls.

BTW, Kentucky’s been working on leg breaking drills for their game against T-1000 and his lover Mr. Joiner. We’re coming for you Timmy.

by MojoCat on Oct 18, 2007 2:47 PM EDT reply actions  

As bad as Lincoln Financial announcers are (although improved since Dave “throws a dart” Rowe’s retirement), it has now reached the point that they are better than anything on ESPN.

Every game with Patrick and Blackledge takes two years from my life. Fried Pies???

by d761 on Oct 18, 2007 2:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Mangino’s necklace of hotdogs

by PW on Oct 18, 2007 2:56 PM EDT reply actions  

  1. - That fried pie looked pretty tasty, as fried things generally do. In this same vein did anyone catch Erin Andrews dissing the Cuban sandwich someone gave her during the GT Miami game. (Of course not no one watched that shit.) She’s like "ah what the…its all cold, I don’t want this thing.

by Brian on Oct 18, 2007 2:56 PM EDT reply actions  

Jim Grobe’s “Linus blanket” for mid-game naps

by PW on Oct 18, 2007 3:06 PM EDT reply actions  

OSU against Bama 0-3
OSU against Tenn 0-1
OSU against Auburn 0-1-1
OSU against UGA 0-1
OSU against UF 0-1-1
OSU against USCe 0-2

Tell me if you have heard this before….OSU Sucks

by Sabanite on Oct 18, 2007 3:06 PM EDT reply actions  

Hmmmmm….maybe its just me but I think Ben fucked up.

by The Last Dragon on Oct 18, 2007 3:10 PM EDT reply actions  

Normally, I have no problem with spreading the wonder that is fried, fruit-filled pastries. Or cookies. Or candybars. Or coke.

But, Patrick and Blackledge ruin everything they touch or speak about. They are to Ron Franklin and Ed Cunningham what Sadim is to Midas.

by d761 on Oct 18, 2007 3:10 PM EDT reply actions  

Inquiring Mind Dept:

I can’t figure this out Ladies and Germs:

If South Florida Bullsh_ _ is ranked so high, why are they favored by just 2 points over Rutgers????

by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Oct 18, 2007 3:10 PM EDT reply actions  

  1. - Cuz Vegas is too smart to pay attention to stupid polls and computer rankings.

by The Last Dragon on Oct 18, 2007 3:11 PM EDT reply actions  

good point pw @ 29

we should be able to self govern in here by now should we not?? tear him a new one southern papa.

by gerry dorsey on Oct 18, 2007 3:15 PM EDT reply actions  

#41

It’s one thing to lose a bowl game, but another to owned every single year by 1 coach.

Little trivia for you, who is the only SEC team to play at the Horseshoe?

LSU

The outcome, Ohio State won and finished the year 4-6-1; LSU went on to finish the season as the Co-Champion of the SEC.

by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 18, 2007 3:18 PM EDT reply actions  

2,

Perhaps even more surprising, no one, not even FSN is going to be carrying an A&M-Nebraska which at the start of the season looked like an ABC game.

by John on Oct 18, 2007 3:20 PM EDT reply actions  

@31,

I’ve caught snippets of Dave^2 while visiting my folks in SC. I think they should take a page from Fox Soccer Channel and have a fan from each team announce the game.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3nIT7tbWb8&mode=related&search=

by Raider Red on Oct 18, 2007 3:24 PM EDT reply actions  

#41

Well, DUH!!!

by SunDawg on Oct 18, 2007 3:33 PM EDT reply actions  

#32

“just realize” or hours of research about Alabama and its history followed by a 2 minute jack-off session to pictures of Maurice Clarett and A.J. Hawk/Brady Quinn erotic literature. If Saban has to worry about obsessive fans-it would be people like you.

by bamafanintigerland on Oct 18, 2007 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

Yeah, Lincoln Financial games look like horseshit compared to regular programming on any other channel, not just HD. Seriously, get a new fucking sponsor.

by Bukkake Lover on Oct 18, 2007 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

I will say this much – Tosuguy spends a shit load of time doing his research. I’m not saying he doesn’t ignore many contrasting facts, but he does do his damn homework.

by Out of Conference on Oct 18, 2007 4:14 PM EDT reply actions  

And no, Tosuguy, that’s not even a back-handed compliment. I’m trying to say, “Get your ass back to work and start contributing to the GNP.”

by Out of Conference on Oct 18, 2007 4:20 PM EDT reply actions  

prediction————-> that UF drum major gets doused in KY bourbon on Saturday.

by drew on Oct 18, 2007 4:23 PM EDT reply actions  

Sabanite:

Nebraska’s record vs:

Alabama: 2-3 (all vs. Bear Bryant)
Arkansas: 0-1
Auburn: 3-1
Florida: 2-0
Georgia: 1-0
LSU: 5-0-1
Ole Miss: 0-1 (under Frank Solich, so it doesn’t count!)
Miss St: 1-0
USCe: 3-0
Tenn: 2-0

Fun game! Nebraska rules, SEC drools!

by Albino Tornado on Oct 18, 2007 4:25 PM EDT reply actions  

Im in the UF band, I play snare, and that dancing black dude is gay.

by Jordan Hombres on Oct 18, 2007 4:26 PM EDT reply actions  

#55

Ohio State’s record vs.

Nebraska 2-0
Oklahoma 1-1
Ok State 2-0
Texas 1-1
aTm 4-0
Texas Tech 2-0
Baylor 2-0
Colorado 3-1
KState 1-0
Missouri 10-1-1

That’s 28-4-1, fun game indeed.

by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 18, 2007 4:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Wannstedt is the anti-Einstein. Al had a better stache too.

by Al on Oct 18, 2007 5:59 PM EDT reply actions  

Hey let me play! USC’s record against the big 12….

Colorado- 5-0-1
Kansas – 0-1-0
K State- 0-2
Nebraska- 3-0-1
Oklahoma 6-3-1
Texas 4-1
Texax A&M 3-0
Texas Tech 3-0
Baylor 3-2

by oc phil on Oct 18, 2007 7:40 PM EDT reply actions  

Okay Bama, you can play too…

Bama vs. the Big12

Nebraska 3-2
Oklahoma 1-2-1
Ok State 0-1
Texas 0-7-1
aTm 3-1
Texas Tech 1-0
Baylor 2-0
Colorado 1-1
Missouri 1-2
Iowa St 1-0

That’s a very pathetic, losing record of 13-16-2.

by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 18, 2007 9:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Gators 41
OSU 14

 Still hurts doesn’t it.

by Dr. Ed PHD.XYZ on Oct 19, 2007 12:50 PM EDT reply actions  

Not really. It’s one game played 8 weeks after the end of the season; time has proven that anything can happen in a bowl game…see Nebraska’s 60+ points against the Gators…Ohio State has so much more going for it that 1 loss is not enough to crush me…we’ll be back, we’ll always be in the mix and it’s not the end of the world if we lose a national championship game…big ten titles and beating michigan is enough to keep me warm at night.

by The Artist Formerly Known as tOSUBuckeyes on Oct 19, 2007 2:25 PM EDT reply actions  

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