DAVE LAPHAM NEEDS TO ENUNCIATE

We're pretty sure that Dave Lapham's saying "face-raking," and just not enunciating all that well. However, the part of our brain that craves monster-truck-sized tires on old four-wheel roller skates and a world where Charles Bronson really does go home, pluck out a pipe, and splash a gallon of cologne on himself before smoking alone happily really wants him to have said "face-rape." That's a much better description of what happened on this play and to Iowa State in general in a 56-3 loss to Texas on Saturday.

(HT: Ever cromulent Awful Announcing.)

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