Context is everything. We know, for example, that it’s likely that the first available photo of Antonio Henton the local station could find once they found out he’d been arrested for attempting to contract a little street lovin’ for himself on Monday night was a crappy old team program photo of dubious quality. It is, in fact, a photo so bad it resembles a mugshot photo taken after the arrest.

I-O! H-O! If we do this, that is.

We also know that Henton wasn’t arrested wearing shoulder pads. However, our imagination has the habit of attempting to make the world more interesting than it actually is, and in this case it’s rolling the tape in our heads of Antonio Henton, standing on a street corner in cleats and pads, trolling for rental pussy in full Ohio State regalia and yelling about somebody needing to put the “H-O” in “Ohio” before his 10:00 p.m. curfew–which, by being arrested at 8:30 p.m., he was clearly not violating.

(A note to the ladies: a man who wears his shoulder pads to bed is damn serious about sixty minutes of full-contact action, ladies. This being the Big Ten, that would be a pounding run up the middle 60 times a game for two scores or so…which ain’t bad.)

UPDATE!!!BULLETBULLETBULLET!!! Charges dismissed!

UPDATE!!!! BULLET X 4 File accidentally closed–new file open, charges NOT dropped, prostitution jokes may resume.