LEPRECHAUN TELLS US STARTING QB FOR ND IN WEEK ONE
Orson Swindle rummages around the EDSBS Bunker, flashlight and can of Pine-Sol in hand.
OS: Shit, we need to clean up around here. Old “Punt Bama Punt!” bumper stickers…an autographed Cecil Collins crowbar…Jesus, it’s like haven’t cleaned in here since the Poulan Weed Eater Bowl—
AAAAAAIIIIIGGGH!! What the fuck, Galoshes? You know we hate it when you sneak up on us like that.
Galoshes McGillicuddy, the Gold-Lusting Whoremouthed Leprechaun of Glories Past : OI HOI, Swindle! I NEED DAT GOLD, N*****!!!
OS: You’ve been spending too much time in Alabama, Galoshes. What’s up?
Galoshes: Fuck yo’ couch! All the gold be in the hands of Saban, and he guards it with a dragon. Burnt me motherfuckin’ hands to rare filets, it did!
OS: Those…those need medical attention, Galoshes. What are you doing here?
Galoshes: What I do best, Swindle. Bring ye the down ‘n durrty on me old boys, The Foightin’ Irish.
OS: (takes out Inserection receipt and old red crayon.) We’re listening.
Galoshes: Don’t gimme that “we” shit, punk! I NEED DAT GOLD N****!!!
OS: Those hands…is that what that smell is? By the way, I have no gold.
Galoshes: Nevermind me hands! Then fifteen thousand in doubloons then, Swindle, for what ye seek to know…
OS: I will give you a dollar fifty and you will tell me, or I will spray you with Pine-Sol until you leave or die a lemony, horrible death.
Galoshes: Demetrius Jones is the starting quarterback against Georgia Tech, boy-o. You need ask no more. NOW GIMME DAT PAPER OR POP GOES THE WEASEL BITCH!!!
OS: (Sprays Pine-Sol on Galoshes’ red, swollen hands. Cries of agony ensue.)
Galoshes: Meant to say: you’re welcome, sirrah.
OS: No problem. How’d you find this out?
Galoshes: Oh, I have mah ways with Charlie, ya know.
OS: Say no more. Seriously. I don’t want to…
Galoshes: No, really, it’s fascinatin’, see? First I gets me lucky ball gag…then I–AAAAIIIIGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
OS: (Sprays Pine-Sol, dials 911.)
One source is here. We confirmed this with Galoshes, who’s as good a source as you can imagine.
P.S. And here. Facebook, again!
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1
Rival says:
Georgia Tech has a of Snot-Nosed Dungeons & Dragons Champion of Tickle Piles Past in their basement. He looks marginally better than the leprechaun picture above.
August 29th, 2007 at 3:54 pm
2
Jonathan says:
Inserection receipt and an old red crayon? That just brings up all kinds of questions about what you keep in your pockets…. just in case….
August 29th, 2007 at 3:57 pm
3
Out of Conference says:
NOW GIMME DAT PAPER OR POP GOES THE WEASEL BITCH!!!
Yeah, I now have to explain my cracking up out loud to several people outside my office in cubeland. Next time, warn me to shut the door. Funny stuff man, funny stuff.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
4
Sabanite says:
The Crichton Leprechaun just gave a verbal commitment to Bama…no gold chnaged hands…I promise
August 29th, 2007 at 4:04 pm
5
Brian says:
Domers just giving away the farm – well at least in the snarktastic world of blogging.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:05 pm
6
The Great Barstoolio says:
“Gold-Lusting Whoremouthed Leprechaun of Glories Past”
I pictured Lee Corso when I read that.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:06 pm
7
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
The Real Genius Dept:
The Leperchaun punking Weis S&M style? Now that deserves the comedic genius label.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:08 pm
8
Orson Swindle says:
HT to Holly for the images.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:12 pm
9
d761 says:
For a good laugh, follow the links back to the original Domer blog. The author’s replies in the comments are priceless. Basically, they go like this:
(1) I am awesome because I know so much;
(2) Of course I can post that;
(3) Nobody reads these blog thingies, right?;
(4) You guys suck.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:15 pm
10
Brian says:
I refer him to this: http://library.thinkquest.org/05aug/00158/images/allseeingeye.jpg
August 29th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
11
Rob says:
How many a’yall seen a leprechaun, say YEAH!
August 29th, 2007 at 4:22 pm
12
NDTom says:
It’s possible that Charlie, being the robot genius that he is, after he found out that GT is starting a CIA hopeful purposely leaked false information to the internet because he knew it would further confuse the situation.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:34 pm
13
Orson Swindle says:
Entirely possible, NDTom.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
14
Hook'em Tide says:
MUSTACHE WED?!@?!?!?!?!
August 29th, 2007 at 4:39 pm
15
crabs says:
Galoshes rules! He buggered Jennifer Anniston’s tits!
August 29th, 2007 at 4:46 pm
16
Ramblin' Jeff says:
Good job Rival! You got a “tickle pile” reference in on the FIRST comment! The tickle pile has to be the most hilarious of all retarded, based-on-nothing, not-particularly-clever stereotypes ever. ONE HUNDRED COCKTAILS to you, sir. You really gave us Techies the what for this time.
August 29th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
17
Digital Headbutt says:
I’ll remember to keep an ample supply of Pine-Sol in my house.
I hope that Garth Algar is not an EDSBS reader…
http://youtube.com/watch?v=xgsGDwVDM18
August 29th, 2007 at 4:59 pm
18
JacketDan says:
I still to this day have no idea what the fuck a tickle pile even is.
August 29th, 2007 at 5:06 pm
19
Brian @ MGoBlog says:
I love you, Tom who references awesome old leprechaun say yeah guy.
August 29th, 2007 at 5:07 pm
20
a5ehren says:
@18:
I don’t really know either…I guess they’re trying to say that we’re gay because we’re smarter than them, but AFAIK there aren’t any pics of our QB spooning with another dude at Talladega. Whatever – THWG.
August 29th, 2007 at 5:22 pm
21
Mr. Bojangles says:
I wan dat gole!
August 29th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
22
jonathantu says:
I’d just like to point out that the proper spelling of “filet”, for an Irishman, is fillet. The pronunciation is literally “fill” plus “it”. After two baffling years of cooking in Europe you get used to this pseudo-commie shit. Plus, Italian women. Yes.
August 29th, 2007 at 6:06 pm
23
Ryno says:
http://www.secpoon.com
thank me later
August 29th, 2007 at 6:19 pm
24
Domer Guy says:
Fully, but what’s with all the “n****” references? Just a joke? A bad Ty Willingham poke? Me confused…
August 29th, 2007 at 6:47 pm
25
Domer Guy says:
fully = funny
August 29th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
26
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
Wet Song Girls Dept:
#23: Ryno: Excellent work, excellent babes of the SEC. Besides Tebow’s #1 ranked babe, my next favorite was the Oklahoma babe, picture number five.
PAC – 10 Representation: A blog asks, “What is better than USC Song Girls?”—-> Wet Song Girls! Here are the pictures….
http://wearesc.com/forums/showthread.php?t=3104
August 29th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
27
Holly says:
I’m not sure how to feel about the implication that I just had those pictures lying around, but I’m going with “delighted”.
August 29th, 2007 at 7:21 pm
28
DC Trojan says:
I read this too quickly the first time and thought that Galoshes was the starting QB for the Irish. Then I realized that’s ridiculous, he’s at least 6″ too short.
Perhaps he hurt his hands clawing his way out of Kenny Irons’ suitcase?
August 29th, 2007 at 7:34 pm
29
RowdyRoddyPiper says:
This whole entire “I’m a geeeenious you will not know which inexperienced QB wil start” thing seems to be contagious in the Belichick coaching tree. Romeo Crennel is refusing to announce a starter for the opener against the Steelers. Maybe Charlie and Romeo are like Super and Bizarro Superman. One is black, the other is white. One is an offenisve mastermind, the other defensive. Both are terrifyingly fat…there goes that theory.
A thousand pardons for bringing this whole “professional football” angle to EDSBS. Also, the guy that says “anybody seen a leprechaun say yeah” guy is not old, he’s young, just got the old man teefs. He’s definitely responsible for the artists sketch of the chaun.
August 29th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
30
RowdyRoddyPiper says:
Apologies for cocking up the “artist’s sketch”. It was and is in fact an “amateur sketch” as if one needed a caption to figure that out. It kind of looks like Glow Worm or a not yet developed Jiminy Cricket.
August 29th, 2007 at 9:32 pm
31
John says:
It could be a crack head who gotta hold of the wrong stuff…
August 30th, 2007 at 1:31 am
32
PAKND'00 says:
The problem for Crennel is that both of his potential starters are the same guy. Does anyone *really* care if Frye or… whoever the 2nd string dude is starts? Nah. The offense wouldn’t change either way. Even Quinn doesn’t make the offense different. He just makes it better.
I think Weis’s decision to not reveal his starter until gametime isn’t motivated by arrogance or a need to stick it to the media or even really to confuse Gailey and Tenuta – I think, and BGS has a convincing post to this effect, that he did it so in the runup to the opener, there would be endless stories about what an arrogant piece of shit Charlie Weis is, and not about how unprepared the Irish starting quarterback is, how he has such big shoes to fill now that Quinn is gone, how will he handle the pressure of being the ND QB, the string of magazine covers, etc, etc, etc. All of that hoopla gets ridiculous around the ND quarterback and Weis defused it to a certain extent.
Instead the whiny sportswriters of the world throw a temper tantrum about Weis and then go home.
August 30th, 2007 at 6:57 am
33
Scalz1 says:
You have Reggie Ball in your bunker?
August 30th, 2007 at 8:02 am
34
canuck says:
#32 Primary reason or not the Robot Genius called a screen and drew the coverage.
August 30th, 2007 at 10:05 am
35
walkernd95 says:
PAKND’00 I agree with you. Think Weis is protecting the starting QB.
August 30th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
36
J. Plott says:
Kenny Irons do has Leprechaun in sootcase?
August 31st, 2007 at 6:29 pm
37
Black Liberace says:
glad I finally found EDSBS, but could do without pissing my pants from laughing so hard.
Stanford might have a chance against the Irish this year
September 2nd, 2007 at 4:52 pm
38
Chelcie says:
Hey, i wanted to give a shout out 2 the guy who plays the Leperchaun i love this Movie!!!
March 16th, 2008 at 10:31 am