EDSBS LIVE! MEDIA MEDIA EDITION

All the laughs and Superchunk too?

Orson…I think….I might be in love with you. We can get a sweet minvan with a slick UGA / UF “House Divided” tag…long weeks on St. Simon’s for the Cocktail Party….Call me, ’k?

Love Munson.

No polls untill October. You could have any bowl system after the season and it would work out since no one would have their head up their ass from the get go. Of course, the lack of early season over ratings fest would deprive Bama and ND fans of their one and only point of pride in the course of a season.

Holly over TexasGal by a hair.

TSW is not only a regulation hottie, but can match me julep for julep.

1. Thomas Boswell, Washington Post. Covers everything, really. But is awesome.

2. Broadcaster(s). Franklin and Gottfried together, and it’s not even close. Franklin’s calls are the only ones I can actually hear in my head (15….10….5….touchdown) when football is out of season. ***Non NCAAF Division: Vin Scully; no explanation necessary.

3. NCAAF should have its own cable channel. Not just Big Ten Network, or whatever…one channel that covers all of it, 24/7.

4. Alyssa Milano; I heard she’s easy, too.

1) I’m not sure I have one. I generally dislike the ESPN and SI guys. My local WaPo guys (Kornheiser and Wilbon) are great but rarely seem to have actual columns. Wally Hall is my team’s sportswriter and he sucks a donkey dong. I’m at a serious loss here thanks to my near 100% conversion to blog life.

2) I will forever miss listening to Paul Eels Razorback broadcasts. It was strange not hearing him last year. My favorite living broadcaster is not a football broadcaster though, nor is he active anymore. But occasionally, when ESPN does baseball games in Detroit they let Ernie Harwell call an inning or two and it is sublime.

3) I want a national college football show that delves into the small conferences. I graduated from a MAC school and living in VA, I have a hard time getting more than a box score regarding most of my alma mater’s games. Give me a channel of nothing but college football from across the nation and I’ll never turn it off.

4) I choose insert Ladies… blogger who participates in EDSBS here

Ok, between the pizza loaf and the black fingernail polish (ok, it’s mostly the pizza loaf) I am completely in love with TSW now.

Oh, and if we count broadcast media (as in the people who show the games), then the simple change should be going to no commercials during quarters, just ads in the upper corner a-la soccer coverage.

2. Jim Fyfe, by far. Touchdoooooooooooown AUBURN!

He’s missed.

1. Eric Hansen – Beat writer turned columnist for the South Bend Tribune. Good sense of humor.

2. Only one good answer: This is Raaaaaaaaay Chriiiiiiisssstennnnnnnsenn for the Gopher Sports Network on ’CCO! And a nod to former ND voice Tony Roberts.

3. Make it less top twenty and give more overviews of important intersectional and traditional conference games. If your team is never in the race for a national title, there is still pleasure in reading about the rivalry games.

4. Um, who wants to see a blogger? To quote Jud Heathcote, former Michigan State coach and green blazer sportin’ quotemaster: “I’ve got a face for radio”.

Sean, you’ve clearly never laid eyes on our Texas Gal. It’s like looking into the sun. Only hotter. And with a drawl (what?).

oh how i loves me some superchunk and i’d give a kidney for a night of passion with laura ballance.

1. Lewis Grizzard was the best, but I’m not sure he really counts here.
2. Ron Franklin is the best current play-by-play guy, but my boy Brent Musberger could probably drink him under the table.
3. Jack Cristil. Probably the best play-by-play guy you’ve never heard. The voice of Mississippi State for over 50 years, and the man has seen some shit. A couple of years ago, after a shutout loss to Alabama, he proclaimed the Sonic Drive of the Game as his drive home to Tupelo. He chain-smokes and drinks during games, and has been known to drop an f-bomb while thinking he was away at commercial.
4. Not real sure, but the recent posting about names for mixed drinks certainly narrowed the list down quite a bit.

1. Your favorite sportswriter–Burger King division. (Big media)
Chris Fowler. Usually doesn’t allow ESPN’s agendas to taint his viewpoints

2. Your favorite broadcaster:

Living: Tie between Musberger (orgasm at every solid play by a Michigan player but tries to hide his homerism, retired: Keith Jackson AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalabammuh.

Dead: Kirk Herbstreit. After his meltdown last year during the whole Michigan vs. Florida debate, Kirk is dead to me.

3. Something about a simple change in Big Media coverage

1) Improve media coverage to at least attempt to put validate opinions and theories. Kirk Herbstreit watches more game film than anyone in the country? How come he didn’t see the utter destruction of Ohio State coming like all of the SEC fans did. Watching highlights of himself from yesteryear doesn’t count Kirk. Notre Dame is going to beat LSU in the Sugar Bowl, Lou Holtz? Give me a fucking break.

2) Get the NFL writers out of the NCAA – I enjoyed watching the FOX NFL crew do bowl games, but I’d rather piss razerblades than read douchebags like Pete Prisco and Mike Lupica discuss college football.

Normally Ivan Maisel and Bruce Feldman do a pretty good job, but that’s just me.

4. Sexiest blogger.

Texas gal. Hands down sexiest voice on the show. I’ll bet she doesn’t have fat arms like them florida ladies.

1. Bizzaro Terrence Moore. If he existed. Bizzaro Mark Bradley is not far behind.

2. Larry Munson. God, that was easy.

3. More highlights, less jibber-jabber on the Gameday recap Saturday night show. Cogent analysis and diagramming would not constitute jibber-jabber, but I’m pretty much sure both are foreign to the Gameday studio crew. Death to Helmet Stickers!

4. Incomplete. Never seen a pic of a female blogger. Between Orson, SMQ, and Brian Cook, I’ll have to go with SMQ.

1. I don’t think he writes for the Washington Post anymore, but Tony K. was my all-time favorite columnist as I spent four years in the district. His columns about Spurrier, when he came to the Redskins, were pure, laugh out loud gold. I also like Lupica. He’s way smug these days but his Sunday column in the NY Daily News is a must-read, even for just his random thoughts where he usually rips the Knicks, Isiah Thomas and the Dolans a new one.

2. Keith Jackson, hands down. The impression the Simpsons did of him (“Jumpin craw-daddies, I’ve run out of homespun cliches!”) was so spot-on it hurt. For active announcers, I’m going with Verne Lundquist. He’s perfect doing the Masters. The telecasts with Bill Raferty during the NCAA Tournament should be playing on a constant loop somewhere in the universe. And he is now, to someone in Connecticut, the voice of SEC football. He has great emotion, but understated, and always a great give-and-take with whoever he announces with.

3. We get it. The media doesn’t like the BCS. Can we still enjoy the regular season, the most unique in sports, without harping on the BCS? It used to be that it came up just after the season if there was controversy but not in other years (’99, ’02, ’05). Now the BCS controversy talk starts way too earlier. I remember Dennis Dodd writing a DOOOOOOOMSDAY!!!!! column about something like 9 teams being undefeated after the season. He wrote it in October. D-oh!

4. Sexiest blogger? Ann Coulter. Wait, does she blog? No matter, I’d like to **** the right right out of her. I actually interview for an article…I’d totally hit it and tell all my friends. Then I’d take a shower or three.

Your link to TheStarter Wife’s blog was a window for me. A window that I have been completely wasting my web brousing time because of my ignorance (this site excluded, of course).

Edit: Her. I interviewed Ann Coulter. I got too excited and forgot me grammar.

Edsall, is this you?

As always, my response to Clay Travis’s comment that we Florida lasses have big arms: of course we do; they get that way from jacking off the enormous penises of our Gator lads. You can’t wrangle a boa with a bendy straw, now.

And I suddenly fear the big-armed TCOAN

SKLM Answers Dept:

1. Your favorite sportswriter–

Living: LA Times’ TJ Simers

Dead: LA Times’ Jim Murray

2. Your favorite broadcaster

Living: Keith Jackson

Dead: Howard Cossell

3. Simple Big Media change:

Allow more than five or six games of national exposure of top teams, such as USC!

4. Sexiest blogger.

Easiest question of the year. The answer is:

  - TCOAN!!!!!!!! (also known as Mary Ann)

Can there be a woman more ideal than that for the college football fan?

SKLM- Thanks for the love, but I don’t think hanging around as a snarky, foul-mouthed nagging presence on my husband’s blog makes me a blogger. ;)

superchunk? you complete me…

TCOAN -

You could totally pull a Sports Gal and demand your own weekly feature.

Only it would be intelligent as opposed to the Sports Gal’s Bachelor drivel.

TCOAN Rules Dept:

#21: TCOAN: Your contributions are like the ace relief pitcher in baseball that seals the deal at the end of close games. May not play all nine innings, but the team would not win on a regular basis without a good one. There is lots of excitement when the pitcher comes in late and wham, bam, thank you ma’am the game is over. This site would not have the same aha! moments without your deadly barbs.

(apologies to all for the baseball reference)

The choice for #4 is obvious to me, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that Orson Swindle has a certain rogue charm of his own. I don’t know if it’s the girlish cackle or his enthusiasm for the game I so love, but to me, that’s dead sexy.

thank you Holly (#17). Yet another example I have been wasting my webtime…until now.

Well the choice wouldn’t be easy for me, but I can narrow it down to three. And that’s where I stop.

I join the masses in thanking you profusely for injecting that bit of Superchunk into my afternoon. A couple of their CDs never left my six-disc changer for a good three-year span during the early 90’s.

1. I have to give it up for Big Sexy himself, Whitlock. You never know where he’s going to come down on an issue, and his voice is unique. I also am a fan of Pat Forde, who at least makes the effort to span the college football globe in his weekly column.

I’ve long been a fan of Wilbon, but his error-filled hatchet job of a column against my alma mater today put him on the “no-click” list for a while…

2. A hearty “word” to those praising Ron Franklin. You hear that voice, even in the middle of winter during a Big 12 basketball telecast, and you think “cool, Saturday night college football!” Honorable mentions here to Morry Mannies, entering his 52nd season as the Voice of the Ball State Cardinals, and Pat Hughes, the soothing, baritoned voice of the Chicago Cubs on WGN…

3. More coverage of non-BCS leagues, less rehashing the previous week’s Ohio State or USC game for the 20th time, less time spent hyping the Game of the Week/Month/Century (any fellow MAC fan who, like me, spent the better part of our weeknight broadcasts last November ready to throw a brick through our TV as the ESPN announcers spent huge chunks of air time completely ignoring the game call in favor of pumping the upcoming Ohio A&M/Michigan game would agree with me on this last point…)

4. Bloggers can be sexy?

By the way, Orson is of course my choice for sexiest blogger, but I must say that I have seen pictures of Holly, and she is stunning. Seriously, seriously pretty.

I guess we share our top 2 then, TCOAN.

1. Don’t read much of anyone anymore… Can I tab Gregg Easterbrook when he’s writing his TMQ column (even with the sometimes tedious bits).

2. I swear I read that there was a chance Tony Roberts would be back doing the ND games since Westwood One didn’t have them this year… this would be good.

3. Better announcers for the “non-traditonal” weekday games. I understand DeKalb, IL is not as “sexy” as other locales, but it’s football dammit… bring at least the C team.

and speaking of sexy…

4. Holly… hands down… I am smitten. (but not stalkery)

1. Tom Mcewan, Tampa Tribune. Read his column about toasting the Gators at Bern’s one evening. Outstanding.
2. I have to go with a pro guy here, but Ron Jaworski is easily the best in the biz. He actually goes into some of the technical nuances of the game.
3. I want more info and less analysis. I want stats from every scrimmage. I want 40 times and bench press for every player on the roster.
4. Jenn Sterger is now a blogger on CNNSI, so she wins for me. Total grudgefuck.

Awww… thanks for the Pizza Loaf, (and black fingernail polish – my favorite), love.

Wait until you see what is coming this week… Buffalo Chicken Dip.

Hizzah!

(And boo… I am almost always still at work when “Live” is on.)

And all the Ladies are sexy! You pretty much can find pics of all of us online if you look hard enough! But it is our savvy, wit, and love of football that win the day!

1. Phil Mushnick, NY Post. He has the lowest tolerance for BS of any beeg media writer.

2. Jack Cristil, Miss State. Always tells it like it is, even when its painful to us Dawgs. #11, I heard the “drive” quote & almost ran off the road.

3. No Notre Dame all the time. And get Coach Weis a chalupa while you’re up, son.

4. Nick Saban does not have time for this question.

TCOAN, it may not make you a blogger, but you’re still our queen bee. (And you know what queen bees get. Laid, that’s what.)

Sportswriter: Pat Forde-enjoy his Forde Minutes column during the season

Broadcaster: TV-Ron Franklin-His intonation gives the viewer a sense of what’s important about the particular game/play

Radio: Ted Robinson-Caught him on XM Radio last year. Just incredibly descriptive, and was able to make Stanford bringing a knife to a gunfight sound interesting.

Change in media coverage: Make the point spread a component of the networks choosing which games to broadcast. For example, there is no possible reason why Rice at Texas (or North Texas at OU) should be on TV. Texas will win by 40. You know it, I know it, the networks know it. But because Bevo’s ranked in the top 5, it’ll be on TV instead of a competitve matchup between two teams that would be interesting to watch. The advent of CSTV and Versus has alleviated this problem somewhat, but it still exists. Perhaps a rule limiting TV appearances would be in order. If UT and FSN wants their Rice or Arkansas St. game on TV so bad, let them do a pay-per-view.

As for sexiest blogger, I need pics/videos to make an informed decision.

You might not have ever seen TSW’s face, but her rack is out there on the intarwebs.

1. Favorite sportswriter: [tiny voice] I don’t have one. [/tiny voice]

2. Favorite broadcaster: I can’t decide: I love Merrill Reese, Harry Kalas, and the guy who used to do the “FIRST! DOWN! PANTHERRRRRRRS!” at Pitt games. That last fellow had such enthusiasm.

3. Big media coverage change: Ugh, national media, GIVE IT A REST on covering Notre Dame. They stink.

4. Sexiest blogger: My fellow Ladies… of course. We’re hot.

1. Sportswriter. Does Norman Chad count? His columns are fantastic, and he’s not a bad poker broadcaster either. Otherwise, I like Peter King.

2. Broadcaster. The incomparable (and fellow Cougar alum) Keith Jackson. His voice IS college football. He’s great with Fouts too.

3. Dump regional coverage and show the best games. And for some reason, the networks have decided that us folks on the west coast are not capable of waking up at 9 am to watch noon ET games, because they rarely show them, with the occasional big matchup exception of UM-OSU or UT-OU. Saturday morning cartoons are pulling big ratings apparently.

We’re stuck with the ESPN worthless Big 10 matchup of the week in the morning, or Southern Miss – Lousiana Tech on ESPN2.

4. I’ll go with lonelygirl15

2. This one has to go to both Cuyler Frank and Lanell Pahe when they broadcast the New Mexico State football games in Navajo.

1) Dan Jenkins, because Jim Tom Pinch doesn’t really exist.

2) Dead: Ufer. Live: Keith Jackson.

3) Executing everyone associated with ESPN would be a good start.

4) Kate Loux. She’s football-deficient, but she’s a better sysadmin than I am. Plus, she actually has a face to go with the words.

1. Pat Forde – love the Forde Yard Dash.

2. All-Time favorite would be the Franklin/Godfried, I also enjoy some of Musburger’s calls (my personal favorites http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZti9CijsZ0&mode=related&search= ).

3. Plain and simple, Big Time Media needs be removed from any involvement in determining awards, polls, bowl match ups, etc. I don’t know what the correct answer is, but how many more times do we need to see the underdog in the NCG win before we realize that the main stream media does not have clue.

I made the DJ at my wedding play “Detroit Has A Skyline” It was just me and a bridesmaid pogoing on the dance floor.

I would have gone with “Slack Motherfucker” but I think that would have killed my grandmother.

1. Hardly “Big Media”, but Cecil Hurt of Tuscaloosa News. The Bham guys are tools, and Finebaum is waaay overrated.

2. Ron Franklin, Verne Lundquist can sometimes get close, but is sometimes off his game.

3. I like the regional concept FSN is trying to go with. Needs to get better.

4. Need jpegs.

1) His name currently escapes mebut he writes for the Seattle PI. Covers more than the northwest, which is nice.

2) Keith Jackson, followed by the exact opposite of Pam Ward.

3) espn treating non-espn games as if they were as important as the one where the gameday crew happens to be on a given Saturday. For examples, see the SEC schedules circa 2000-2006.

4) Uh, me?

I’m all giddy about Euro soccer getting underway – well, in the industrial northern countries, anyway – which will explain a couple of my answers….

1. Does Bruce Feldman count? If yes, then him. Soccer division: David Lacey from the Guardian for sheer class, and Barry Glendenning for sheer rudeness.

2. Keith Jackson, past it or not. Soccer division: Des Lynam opening the BBC coverage of the 98 world cup by looking into the camera and saying “Shouldn’t you be at work?”

3. I second the idea of having the sponsor logo on the screen instead of commercial breaks.

4. I’ll suggest the Great Barstoolio – anyone with that depth and breadth of musical taste surely must be teh hottness.

Surely.

(translation: shucks; thanks!)

skip to #4

www.kitta.net

1. Gil Lebreton, Fort Worth Star-Telegram. He’s not afraid to be row against the tide of popular opinion, and he’s a friend to the Frogs.

2. Ray Hudson, but that’s soccer. Theirry Lacroix, but that’s rugby…in French. For college football, I’d probably have to go with TCU broadcaster Brian Estridge, Verne Lundquist and Ron Franklin. In the “legends” division, Merle Harmon is a lock.

3. I’m definitely on board for more non-BCS coverage and more highlights of non-top 25 games, period. In fact, I’d much rather watch Central Michigan-Akron highlights than hear Doug Flutie opine about USC-Oregon or Lee Corso say anything at all. Maybe I’m alone in feeling this way, but to me the beauty of college football is the variety of it and the sheer number of teams, and I don’t want broadcasters to treat it like the NFL and only focus on 25-30 teams (if that many). Hell, give me 1-AA or NESCAC highlights—I’ll watch. More football, fewer talking heads.

4. Orfon Swindle, of courfe…given that I’ve never seen any photos of female bloggers. Actually, my choice would probably be whichever of the Ladies… chose the rusty nail as her football cocktail. That’s hardcore sexy.

#43, that’s too bad, especially if your boss was at the wedding…

“I’m working… but I’m not working FOR YOU!!!!”

Doesn’t qualify as a broadcaster, but former Ben Hill Griffen PA announcer Jim Finch was a voice that since my very early days, I associated with the almighty.

1. Thomas Boswell, Washington Post

2. Tony Roberts, the voice I grew up with for Notre Dame football. We would usually mute the TV and listen to the radio call on Westwood One. Hopefully he’ll be back when the Irish get a new radio contract!

3. I’m pretending it’s the royal “we” for this question: Replace Tom Hammond and Pat Haden with Tony Roberts and Alan Pinkett on NBC broadcasts of ND games.

4. Big Daddy Drew, hands down.