LAS CRONICAS RETURNS TO RUIN HOGS BUZZ

Woohoooo! Smells like pork barbeque over here in B’ham.

I have a friend who knows a guy closely involved with the LSU program who knows another guy involved loosely with the Razorback program and he tells me that Colin Tucker and Zac Tubbs are like butt buddies.

Because I am shallow and immature

Dick Slowly Improving with Shorter Strides

http://nwanews.com/nwat/Sports/55888/

Someone get Jerkwheat a cocktail, now.

Because I am shallow and immature….

Dick Slowly Improving with Shorter Strides

http://nwanews.com/nwat/Sports/55888/

Not sure what happened there with the double post…

Huzzah for everything in this post including comments so far!

wow…los cronicas never ceases to amaze. luckily humanity advanced can win 7 games by his damn self.

although only slightly cfb related…darius miles says d-mac’s car “ain’t shit.”

mash me

my fav recro0t:

gimme 1 sec. g0t wussee in office. given me hedake. sumthn bout leaving. not 2 suur. caint hear wit aLL da typin.

text me bak, stud!1

tanx,

nuTt

This is the greatest year in pig chronicles since Charlotte’s Web.

Woo pig sooie!! ’Hawgs got ’em a squeala!

oh the suspense!
so how long until Nutt gets booted?

FWIW – it’s my understanding that Mr. Tucker has apologized to the Rivals mods for it. Never the less its been the topic du jour at the happy Hog boards (rivals) and the not-so-happy Hog boards (the razorbacktalk one linked to, Hogville, ok, and every Hog board not from rivals…)

I really can’t wait for the actual games to get here…

I guess Nutt didn’t have time for Tucker’s shit.

Steroids in college football? You mean those guys don’t gain 30 pounds of muscle from eating right and working out all the time? I am just shocked…

/sarcasm

Look, if you aren’t fully prepared to shoot up the juice and run gassers on a broken foot, then you don’t have no business in the SEC. Wins are worht WAY more than your health. Nick Saban would definitely NOT have time for your shit.

Anyway, maybe Colin should have just told Dale via text message.

Wow! My apologies for that ugly post. Despite my Alabama public schooling, I do not normally use double negatives.

Howevur, I stil kaint spale wurth shyt.

I love the University of Arkansas!! As a Yankee from Connecticut, whose understanding of college football came from an dad/uncle/bunch of cousins who went to Notre Dame, I love picturing what Arkansas must be like. I picture a bunch of crazed hillbillies, yelling pig sooey at all hours of the day, spreading gossip like wildfire and people running through the streets like Godzilla was on its way.

It’s made even better by the fact they have the best player in country on their team and Houston Nutt is batsh*t crazy. I’m rooting for Arkansas to win all its games.

And who doesn’t love watching Arkansas play? From the wacky Wildcat game against Tennessee, to the odd game against LSU where Humanity Advanced was born and the SEC title game where NOTHING MADE ANY SENSE, they are my favorite non-rooting interest team to watch. They need an NBC contract. They need a reality show. They need constant ESPN coverage. They should have Gameday live from Fayettville on a Tuesday for fun.

What happened when a Father needs to be heavily involved with his son’s COLLEGE career?

I hated parents in high school getting too involved.

If this is all true than walk away. Tell the coach where to go and just walk away. You do not need to partake in the madness if you don’t want to, nor throw daggers on the way out the door.

Y’all get ready for even more radiation therapy before September.

Yeah I read this on www.razorbacktalk.com (great site for Hog info.) last night and was pissed once again at the incompetence of HDN and staff.

Edsall, is that an endorsement for 2-A-Days to be moved from Hoover High to Fayetteville?

Will the top storyline be Nutt’s love life or d-mac’s rim size?

No. 17:

Hear, hear! Except the hillbillies are running through the hollers with their giant shoeless feet (think Li’l Abner).

Man, no wonder Dana Altman left a vapor trail on his way out.

Yeah, Orson, I was “jonesing for that midday enema of unadulterated crazy” and you served it up right with a firehose… I was kinda hopin’, though, to get a little o’ them ‘fried tapir nuggets’ on the side…tasty little fuckers.

Las Chronicas es el mejor telenovela del mundo.

At least it’s the best one by a mile that doesn’t have a plethora of smoking hott chicas…

I fucking love this shit- between this, the wackiness of Nutt, and the punter who does sun salutations, how can you not love Arkansas football?

I love the motherfucking SEC more than I love pink & white shortbread animals cookies with frosting & sprinkles.
And the Big 10 thinks they need a network? Sheeeeit.

Kanu -

I wish we still had the punter. Then I’d have at least one more fun thing to look forward too.

Is it legal for me to take pulls from a jug of shine at the office? Cause I’m a thinkin’ about it.

Well, I don’t know about steroids, but the head trainer mentioned in the article, Dean Weber, was convicted in a scandal several years revolving around 10,000 unaccounted for doses of Darvocet in a 15 month period.

It is a matter of public record. Not only was he giving them to the players like candy, but PaPa Broyles was getting some of them as well. Of course, only at Arkansas would a convicted felon still be the head trainer.

I take offense to the term “hillbillies”…the politcally correct term is “Ozark Americans”

#25

YES!!! I completely forgot about that sun punter shit! Is he still on the roster or what. I hope he plays there forever

Did anyone ever figure out WTF that was about?

It’s not Hell, it’s Arkansas.

Jerkwheat, good news: drinking moonshine is not a crime…it’s the manufacturing part that gets one in trouble with the fuzz. Do it, but please save a swig for me!

JW- so tragic that the Sun Saluter has moved on. Probably opened a yoga studio/smoothie bar somewhere.

Legal, shmegal- if it feels right, do it I say, as long as you aren’t harming anyone other than your own liver.

The Orgeron is waittinfordahriighttiimahtogettapiecadisaction, nah.

Fooobaw!

I’d kill for moonshine right now. Nutt has officially gone loco.
He’s gone after this year regardless. Either the Hogs win the West and he uses it as a stepping stone, or they bomb and he gets shitcanned.

1. those cookies are like an orgasm for the mouth. and like fsu’s “jimbo fisher = BCS bowl” kool-aid, it makes your stomach hurt if you have too much of it

To 21:

Two-a-days at Fayettville might be the greatest show in the history of the world. Coach Nutt would be given ample time to talk and pontificate to the camera about nothing in particular. Humanity Advanced could show off his tats, car, Halloween costume and insane speed. Not to mention cameras following Casey Dick around as he is the buttend of 1,000 jokes a day. And we have the strength coach pull an ORGERON!!! and yelling at kids to stick needles in their ass. Let’s throw in some local reporter getting porked by the coach, crazy parents flocking to practice and obsessed, toothless fans filing court motions on Internet traffic.

If that show doesn’t get you excited, you are NOT American and NOT a college football fan. Even celebtards like Lohan and reality “stars” like the Miz would watch and be like, “Damn, now those people are crazy.”

1. - I thought an “orgasm for the mouth” was called the “money shot”

Orson:
17 comment is the funniest post ever…Edsall is God!

Even Saban would read his shit.

1. I think the “money shot” is for the eye.

For the record, Iced Animals freaking rule….

I still cannot believe we have combined Nutt, Spurrier, Orgeron, and Saban into one conference. Mark Richt could probably star in Tom Byron’s “Hangliding Bukkake #23: Vietnamese Tranny Edition” and not get noticed…

38:

To hear that Nick Saban has time for my shit is the biggest compliment I have ever received.

And Edsall is God. If you don’t believe, I invite anyone and everyone to come to Hartford to tailgate for a UConn. You laugh, you joke, but Coach Edsall fills the fuckin’ place when Maine comes to town! Coach Edsall has also mastered Tressel-speak, has the local media in the palm of his hand, got a $30 million practice facility built and tell us every August we’re going to win the Big East title.

He’s the only man I’d go to Detroit in December for. And we pwned that Motor City Bowl. Suck it Toledo!!!

#17
If you needed any more incentive, that insane clusterfuck of a dysfunctional football program is the defending SEC West champs.

Did everyone check out Humanity Advanced’s Halloween costume??

http://winningtheturnoverbattle.blogspot.com/2007/08/darren-mcfadden-is-clown.html

42:

I know. The antics wouldn’t be half as fun if they sucked. Their game against Florida in the SEC Title Game was the most entertaining football game I have watched in years. It wasn’t epic like the Texas/SC Rose Bowl or the ND/SC game from 2005, it was just pure chaos. Say that Rose Bowl was Gladiator, Arkansas/Florida was Transformers. It made little actual sense but you couldn’t stop watching.

Looks like the Ogre is experimenting with Schaeffer. I wonder why? A 47% completion percentage is good, right?

http://3rdsaturdayinblogtober.wordpress.com/2007/08/08/schaeffer-the-next-matt-jones/

While Two-a-Days in Fayetteville would be fun, it still wouldn’t compare to latest goings on at Hoover. With ADs quitting in disgust, principals fired, rumors of Probts having multiple affairs and a secret second family across town. Crazy crazy stuff.

YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOS CHRONICAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ll be honest with you guys… I live in the Fayetteville area and see this soap opera on a daily basis.
If they get Dick to be huge this year, look out. Did I just say that? He’s the QB… Anyway, if he can give them just barely above average play, the Hogs will make noise nationally.

You heard it here first: The game in Death Valley will be between 2 unbeatens. “Crazy as bat shit” Nutt vs. General Patton, errrrr, Les Miles

Tez,

They didn’t hear it “here” first. I said that the other day, but at least we’re in agreeance.

I’m gonna go ahead and call bullshit on Pa Tucker’s post to the message board (i.e. it’s not actually Pa Tucker). There were a lot of holes in it that I’m too lazy to note, but I will if taken to task.

Also, the post referencing Dean Weber’s supposed drug scandal as “a matter of public record” is a bit disturbing, mostly because I’ve never heard anything about it. Not saying it isn’t true. Had you heard about it, Jerkwheat?

Tez…that’s impossible. Turn on the TV the day after Turkey for more information.

F Yellville.

F Nutt.

my mistake Gary. I fear the power of the Busey, so don’t hurt me. Anyone who eats roadkill and steals Swayze and Keanu’s scenes is an absolute badass.

Found this on Weber’s little situation he had.

http://courts.state.ar.us/opinions/1998a/980115/97-170.txt

God, this year would be perfect if the camera’s would catch Nutt snorting a line at the 6:21 mark of the second quarter in the game vs Alabama followed by a pirated signal overtaking the CBS feed and showing the first few minutes of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.

Oh, and one other thing, when is someone going to create an Arkansas Football Rumor Mill website.

Oh, that’s right, anything they’d come up with would be tame compared to the truth.

All this crazy ArkyHawg shit makes me want to watch “Used Cars” again.

Allahver Fist, Outstanding, I was just thinking the exact same thing re: Used Cars. The pirated signal being Squiggy interupting the game to show a local dealership “Blowing the shit out of high prices!” Hell, if he can build and install a pace maker in one of Nutt’s relatives the analogy would be complete.

Vegas is certainly noticing the Arkansas nonsense.

SportsBook.com has Arky as a 2-point underdog @ Alabama in week 3 AND (interestingly) a 1-point underdog, at home, against an Auburn team that they beat by 17 points last year.

so if yous guys that think Arky is gonna be undefeated when they go to LSU head out to Vegas and put the shanty deed on Houston’s boys. Next thing you know, old Jeb’s a millionaire

This is fake right. If not it’s the biggest load of $@!# i’ve ever read!

Busey,

Sorry I got to this late – but yes, I was kinda familiar with Weber having been in some trouble several years back. But, honestly, I had forgotten all about it. He’s been there forever and a day and is practically Broyles-ian in his tenure it seems. Anyway it appears Tez found the court info.

All I want is for the damn games to start so we all have something substantiated and 100% real to argue about again.

Take these pills son if you wanna be a winner, a winner and a fighter. I’m not a doctoer, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.

34 relatives all graduated? Why do I want to see that family tree?

the General disapproves of this wuss-ness. Howlevver, Boss Hawg funny…. will find some peasants to subjagate in his honor

I hope this gets noticed. This is a link for a 42 page legal brief filed on 8 August concerning the legal case to get the Chancellor in trouble for inefficient management (I didn’t go to law school and also Arky Grad).

http://www.woopig.net/board/index.php?topic=55655.0

It is only heating up all over again.

shit’s getting thick…if you have access to Sports Rap on KARN, get it on there now.

One positive Razorback note today, John Daly’s performance in Tulsa. His interview is off the charts hilarious. Mentions him going to play the slots at Cherokee Casino instead of practicing.

http://i.pga.com/pga/images/events/2007/pgachampionship/pdf/8_9_daly.pdf

The Arkansas compliance officer was right in the middle of the scandal that got the Razorbacks put on probation. Only in the SEC