PAC 10 MEDIA DAYS: KEEPING IT SMOOTH, IN A SECESSIONIST SENSE

c’mon Orson – it’s only fair that someone else gets to share the shame of a USC whippin’

Rhetorical devices: I’m actually a big big fan of “It is what it is.” Delivered with a wry shrug, it’s non-statement nonsense at its very finest.

Virginia’s ascent to #1 came two years before FSU joined the conference. It’s unlikely that they or Georgia Tech would have been unbeaten if they would have had to have played FSU.

1990 was one of the weirdest years in college football, where every good team lost a couple games and we were left with an inexplicable Virginia-Georgia Tech game going a long way to deciding the national champion.

Florida would have had a good claim for the title going into the FSU game if not for that pesky “we’re on probation again” thing.

USC should hope for its own sake that the rest of the conference steps up, because as we have seen with FSU, hegemony leads to decay.

If USC falls off, will the Pac-10 try to expand like the ACC did, picking up Boise State and someone like BYU or Hawaii?

By the way, “Don’t take this the wrong way…” ranks right up there with “No offense, but…” and “I’m not racist or anything, but…” as statements that are the equivalent of “I’m about to say something offensive, so pay attention.”

Nice sweater, Archie. What time are you meeting Veronica at the malt shop?

You know what? Let the Pac-10 and Big 10 opt out. Rotate the Final Four between the Cotton, Fiesta, Sugar and Orange, and have a BCS Title Game (and, perhaps, a bronze-medal game?) at the same stadium 5-6 days later. And who plays in this Final Four? The champions of the SEC, ACC, Big East and Big XII. If Notre Dame wants in, they should join the Big East full time. Final Four starts New Year’s Day, the first game starts an hour before the Rose Bowl — this is Sparta. Let the market decide.

Why haven’t any comparisons been made between Harbaugh and The Orgeron yet? If someone could work out the Pay-Per-View cage match, I think we’d be onto something. It could be done the night before college football season kicks off.

San Diego played at Drake last year and we happened to be piss drunk and across the street (there would be no other reason to go to a Drake football game) at kickoff, so we went in to check it out. The temperature was twenty below and Harbaugh was stalking the sidelines in a short-sleeved shirt. That boy aint right in the head.

so Pac-10 stands for Pussy Ass Crybabies right? seriously i know that USC owns everyone (unless you can bat down a pass with your d-line) but the real reason that the Pac-10 won’t agree to a playoff is because they know their weakass no defense confrences guarantees USC almost always has a shot at playing for the National Title every year. why share the wealth?

That fucking LAT piece was LITERALLY waved in my face this morning when I walked in the door. S’gonna be a looong five weeks.

And there is no rhetorical device that can compare in scope and power to adding “bless your heart” to the end of the most scathing diatribe.

12

I concur, Holly. For example:

“That chick looks like a female version of Sloth from The Goonies, bless her heart.”

That video had the fucking gayest “gang” fight I’ve ever seen. Very evocative of PAC 10 football.

@8

I was wondering the same thing. I’d still take The Orgeron, because as Les Miles tells us: the Pac-10 is made up of fluffy bunnies, care bears and whores like Hayley LaFontaine.

If you should ever want to say something completely untowards or inappropriate towards someone, just include "I mean, don’t take this personally…" and then conclude with "I’m just saying."

Is “With all due respect, …” still a valid statement as well, or does it make what follows seem a little bit harsh?

“With all due respect” belongs in the conversation as well. You can pretty much call your boss a dickface who couldn’t spell “cat” if you spotted him the “c” and the “a” as long as you preface it with that gem, right?

Aerobab owes me a coke . . .

1. and #12 – I’m still taking the Orgeron as well, although I see Harbaugh becoming our own equivalent out here.

I’d actually kind of like to see Hawaii in any expansion that the Pac-10 would do down the road.

Grudging respect to UCLA, who, by the LAT article, have a defensive end uninterested in having hype shoved down his throat. No one likes a kiss ass, least of all Pete Carroll.

If Harbaugh can hang on another year or two, he might be able to bring the Orgeron back to the left coast.

A match-up I’d like to see:

Jim Harbaugh vs. Dan Hawkins

Some D1 football with some intellectual attitude.

Don King can make it a pay-per view production – Only in America!

20

I doubt it. I mean, would you want to be the guy who tells The Orgeron he’s fired?

i view harbaugh as a west coast (see video linked above) version of theorgeron.

he’s a bit laid back in the cut, like what, an a bit crack house rat.

i dunno about bsu jumping into the conference, i have heard utah, byu, the seattle supersonics, and colorado*

*i made one of those up

Re: 1990, with all due respect, and don’t take this personally, but michael, you’re a toolbag. I’m just saying. GT would have wiped the floor with fsu or uf that year, bud.

Holy Fuck. That video is TOTO-ALLY GAY!

First of all, Roseanna is pretty GD hot – even for an early 80’s video chick.

Second, there are several prime mustache Wednesday candidates in that band.

Third, is that Al Franken hiting the low notes at approx 1:50 in the video?

Pac 10 vs. SEC Dept:

Pac 10 Haters -> Here is some West Coast bias: The SEC may have a few better teams overall than the Pac 10. But, at least in the manly Pac 10 they are not like little Chickens of the SEC. Check out the non-conference schedule of the SEC, which looks very “NotreDamian”, plus all of these cup cake games are mostly at home ( Spit):

SEC East

Florida – Western Kentucky, Troy, Florida Atlantic, Florida St.

Georgia – Oklahoma St., Western Carolina, Troy, @ Georgia Tech

Kentucky – Eastern Kentucky, Kent St., Louisville, Florida Atlantic

South Carolina – La. – Lafayette, S. Carolina St., @ North Carolina, Clemson

Tennessee – @ California, Southern Miss, Arkansas St., La.-Lafayette

Vanderbilt – Richmond. Eastern Michigan, Miami (OH), Wake Forest

SEC West

Alabama – Western Carolina, Florida St., Houston, La.-Monroe

Arkansas – Troy, North Texas, Tenn.- Chattanooga, Florida International

Auburn – Kansas St., S. Florida, New Mexico St., Tennessee Tech

LSU – Virginia Tech, Middle Tennessee, @ Tulane, La. Tech
Mississippi St. – @ Tulane, Gardner-Webb, UAB, @ West
Virginia

Mississippi – @ Memphis, Missouri, La. Tech, Northwestern St.

I loooooathe our schedule this year. WTF, where are our good games? What’s with the cupcakes?

Let’s hope the PAC 10 is successful in beating back playoffs or plus ones or petitfours or whatever other playoff system ESPN and Chtkuthlu want to foist upon us.

Any playoff would be a mess and would undermine ancient rivalries and regional differences.

#24-

Oh, stop it with the “NotreDamian” schedule. Yeesh, you schedule all three academies in one year (because Kevin White is an idiot), and suddently every schedule you play is full of patsies. Look at ND’s 2007 sched. Eight out of the twelve played in bowls; four were playing in January. Yeah, Air Force and Duke suck, but so do Vandy and Stanford.

(What? ND plays Stanford too? Hm. Well, Idaho then.)

1. and #24

even over “Beat It?”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-k_3ofk89U

Clearly, by #24, I meant #25. Sorry, crabs. My Big East education left me illiterate.

The difference between Harbaugh and The Orgeron is that when Harbaugh gets upset, he flips out but could be subdued by two police officers and a good can of mace. When the Orgeron gets upset, he levels a small town from the A Bomb-like shockwave of his bellow, and then hops in his Hummer to lay waste to the countryside.

Incidentally, when Pete Carroll gets upset, he curses the sky and then goes home to cry himself to sleep with John Mayer music playing softly in the background.

I think this tops the list for gayest (and definitely most bizzarre) video of all time:

http://justjared.buzznet.com/2007/07/23/philippine-prisoners-thriller/

now wait a goddamned moment, SKLM. You’re assuming Richmond, Eastern Michigan, Miami (OH), Wake Forest aren’t going to be tough games for Vandy.

Kidding aside and to put my homer hat on, South Carolina’s schedule is ranked #2 toughest schedule in most polls (with SoCal getting #2 in one, but weaker than South Carolina is all others). So, using USCe as an example, if USCw could play an in-conference schedule as tough as USCe, then maybe you could include USCe in your argument. Otherwise, it weakens it.

Crabs #32 – I’m scared to clink on that link for fear I may like the song. I was clikcing channels (DireTV) the other night and ran across 101 playing videos chosen by text-messaging in votes. They played Daft Punk’s, “Robot Rock”. At first I was queered out like I was watching Project Runway, but then the music kind of stuck in my head… kind of catchy. No, not the gayness- the music.

Per LATimes “USC, the team Miles can’t wait to face in the Sugar Bowl, has blown away every SEC opponent it has faced dating to Matt Leinart’s debut at Auburn in 2003.”

Biased journalism when you consider two of those 3 wins came against a 4-7 Arkansas team and a 8-5 Auburn team.

He makes it sound like they had played half the teams in the conference.

OOC -

go on click it – you know you want to.

and here’s the direct you-tube link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o

FYI: Posts from first-time commenters are sent to a mod queue where Orson can approve them. When they are approved they are inserted into the thread in chronological order, which bumps all the post numbers following it down. That #95 post may well have been #91 when you first saw it.

7 Years in Gainseville (#7),

Hate us all you want, but I think Jerome Bettis is still running wild on your ass.

No. 34 – Out of Conference:

USCeast’s non-conf games include:

1. La. – Lafayette
2. S. Carolina St.
3. @ North Carolina
4. Clemson

I have never heard of colleges # 1 and # 2. Baby Blue #3 is a b-ball school (meant as insult), and #4 is coached by a knucklehead. Cannot compare that mess to USCwest’s schedule, which is manly and non-“NotreDamian”, even though ND is on the schedule. Give ND credit, it has not chickened out of the series with SC, the way Michigan is trying to chicken out of their Mich-ND series.

Bless you, Loggins!

Hansen has a somewhat of a point on a Plus-1. In 2004, USC goes to the Rose, Oklahoma goes to the Fiesta and Auburn goes to the Sugar. If all three win, there’s still a huge controversy. Either keep the system the way it is or go to a real playoff.

SKLM, why not focus on the whole schedule instead of just ooc?

#44: Unhappy Monkey:

You may have a good point. I get spittin’ mad every time I read about the so-called superiority of the SEC, when I see a whole lot of chickens in your conference, playing as many patsies at HOME as possible. (Sort of reminds me of Chicken-Hawks Dick Chaney and Dick Rumsfeld.)

So, in the SEC you have 4 games against gimmes, 4 against weak-to-mid-level teams, and 4 against good teams, with two of those at home.

Whoopty Do, give the SEC a prize and do not pass “Go”!

Now if you do not mind, I will go back to the Ms. Shiny Ass of the week pictures…

“8-5 Auburn team”

i remember the hype that team had, holy hell. cover of espn magazine with dansby and the statement “the best can turn it on.”

SC absolutely sodomized auburn on their home field.

well, SC is pretty much all the px has. oregon’s qb is playing minor league baseball this summer (after not playing it since high school). cal hates football as evidenced by the hippies that chain themselves to where the new stadium is supposed to be. osu/ucla, two “good” teams last year, ill be surprised if they repeat that this year. uw has TW, nuff said.

ASU, two years, ol smuggler gets “his” players in, watch out.

Wow, sklm, that’s quite a response. Since you were discussing USCe, let’s look at just a part of their conference schedule:

@ Georgia
@LSU
@Tenn
@Ark
Fla at home

Now why would USCe need to schedule ooc powerhouse (like ND, Neb or Idaho) when it wil face that?

1. - Monkey:

With all due respect…..my responses are getting rowdier and rowdier. Time to do something else…and get off this computer……but it would be GREAT if USC-east, played USC-west for the MNC. With Spurrier working his magic, it may be possible. Imagine the sports headlines…Trojans Vs. _….(Better get out now…before the double entendres start dropping like fleeees.)……Have a nice weekend y’all.

SKLM, no sweat. I’m sure the subject will come up again, bless your heart.

Whoa whoa whoa…….Cal loves football. Hippies hate everything. Cal players are nothing like hippies…this is merely the team that smoked half an ounce, drank some wheatgrass tea while singing koombayah with tambourine accompaniment in the shade of native foliage followed by a 45-10 piledriving of aTm.

Yea, I’ll grant you SEC > Pac 10. But SEC DOES NOT >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Pac 10. And Pac 10 > all else besides SEC.

I can’t believe everyone in this entire tread has missed this point – kick me in the nuts if someone mentioned it and I missed it.

FULMER CUP

SEC: 88 Points
Pac10: 11 Points

That can not be understated enough – plus the graduation rates and the academic standards of the Pac10 universities are extremely high.

Plus, if I’m not mistaken, the Pac 10 has a winning record against the SEC over the last ten years.

I definitely remember UCLA putting it to 3rd ranked Bama (beat Bama back to back – before the probation era too).

You would think that SEC fans would show a little humility; at least one of those 5 NCs that they keep bragging about came directly from Ohio State upsetting Arizona State in the Rose Bowl in 96. The 2003 LSU NC is a joke – we already beat that horse to death – so really in terms of MNCs the SEC has 3 legit – Bama in 92; Tenn in 98, and Florida in 06…that’s 1 more than USC and the Big Ten and just as many as Nebraska….see reality can be whatever I want it to be.

tosu – you forgot to put up Big 10’s Fulmer Cup points.

SKLM – would love for a USCe-USCw matchup in the MNC, and I would hope it turns out the same way that the previous matchup between those schools went.

EirshE at #29:

Don’t sweat SKLM. In his mind, outside of the USC game, ND plays Navy, Air Force, and Army every week, every season—schedule looks like: Army, Navy, AF, USC, Army again, Navy again, Air Force again, then Navy again, then Army again, followed by at Air Force, then ending with senior week at home against Army, before a neutral site contest against Navy. Nevermind that we start the season with Ga Tech, then Penn State and Michigan. ND’s problem isn’t a weak schedule—it’s that we frontload it like idiots, unlike our SEC brethren who start the season off with Western Carolina, Western Kentucky, etc. Sadly, with Kevin White and his 7-4-1 model, we may be getting closer to the IAA cupcakes than we like.

But like I said, don’t sweat SKLM—he conveniently ignores the fact that last year’s 3 games against service academies has only happened 3 times or so in the last 40 years.

I hate to say it, but tools like tOSU are making this blog (at least the comments section) jump the shark. tOSU, go back to your day job of taking Columbus Steamers (that’s a Cleveland Steamer with a buckeye up your ass) from Jim Delany as he strains in vain to get his lame ass network on Comcast.

1. - Crabs – ok, the gravitational pull sucked me in. I cliedk on it and want that 5 minutes back, now. Here’s one for you-
   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HiBn55tA8Cs&mode=related&search=
   (sorry, my cheat sheet on how to post clickable links is at work)

This Pac-10 football fan doesn’t like Hansen but does agree with him on the bowl game / playoff issue. I’d like to see the Pac-10 champ play in the Rose Bowl and damn the rest.

I’d also like to point out that USC lost to Oregon St and UCLA last year. And handily beat Nebraska and Michigan. The Pac-10 plays them better than the OOC opponents.

Glory Days….They Pass You By Dept:

Nate (ND-98) # 54: The more you bring up Notre Dame and the Service Academies the more you dig yourself into a hole.

Try, for once to live in the 21st century, and leave the Academies along with leather helmets and Rockne rest comfortably in the past….

@58 – SKLM

Ok, we’ll live in the present. ND’s 2007 schedule:

Sept. 1 GEORGIA TECH
Sept. 8 at Penn State
Sept. 15 at Michigan
Sept. 22 MICHIGAN STATE
Sept. 29 at Purdue
Oct. 6 at UCLA
Oct. 13 BOSTON COLLEGE
Oct. 20 USC
Nov. 3 NAVY
Nov. 10 AIR FORCE
Nov. 17 DUKE
Nov. 24 at Stanford

12 games, 6 against good teams, 2 against teams that can be good or bad by year (Purdue, Mich. State), and 4 relative cupcakes. That’s comparable to anyone in the country. Would I prefer if we played more talented teams? Of course. I suspect anyone would want their team to play talented teams. Am I ashamed by a schedule that compares well to the rest of the top-tier schools in the nation? Of course not.

Does thinking past the bias really hurt that much that you just can’t do it?

Don’t argue with SKLM. I could give a hundred reasons why not, but the best might be Ecclesiastes: “Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own conceit. Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest thou also be like unto him.”

I’m such a goddamn douchebag for quoting the bible.

I’ll Play Dept, or the Good the Bad and the Fugly:

#59, Mike: The way I count it, 3 good games, 5 medium games, and 4 gimmes. You are somewhat right. Not that bad, but still not very manly.

Seems like ND tries to guarantee enough wins to get to a bowl game, and then Bam! right in the kisser.

1) Sept. 1 GEORGIA TECH
2) Sept. 8 at Penn State
3) Sept. 15 at Michigan
4) Sept. 22 MICHIGAN STATE
5) Sept. 29 at Purdue
6) Oct. 6 at UCLA
7) Oct. 13 BOSTON COLLEGE
8) Oct. 20 USC
9) Nov. 3 NAVY
10) Nov. 10 AIR FORCE
11) Nov. 17 DUKE
12) Nov. 24 at Stanford

The Good: #2, #3, #8,

The Bad: #1, #4, #5, #6, #7

The FUgly: # 9, #10, #11, #12

Douchebaggery Dept.

#61: Wilbur, calling yourself a douchebag is an insult to douchebags! At least douchebags were useful for something ONCE!

Thank you for clarifying SKLM.
Good 1-2
Bad 4-1
Fugly 4-0

When a mediocre team like ND has nine games they will easily go 8-1 against it is a weak schedule.

*Brought to you by the Committee of SEC Teams Who Would NOT Like To Get 70 Hung On Them By An Extremely Pissed-Off USC Trojans Team In an 07-08 Bowl Game. This ad is not associated with Les Miles in any way you can possibly imagine.

Hayley Lafontaine could hang 70 on USC…in zero gravity. With Mangino chained to her leg. While plotting to steel a bag of cheetohs from Fulmer. And lowering Saban’s salary. In the first quarter.