THE CURIOUS INDEX, 7/24/07

Mister Simpson’s real name is Homer Thompson.

Re: “Cold War Kids,” who I was listening to last night, I’ve got to go with “Tell Me In the Morning” (or “Hair Down,” but only for personal reasons). Except for “Hospital,” the first half of ‘Robbers and Cowards’ decisively overshadows the last.

It’s all overshadowed by the album I bought at the same time, though (yes, I am the paleolithic Album Man): ‘The Trials of Van Occupanther’ by Midlake. So good I can’t even talk about it.

“That’s how Steve Hutchinson does fucking halibut.”

T-shirt! I will be clicking the EDSBS Spreadhirt store link in 1 hour. If there ain’t no fucking T-shirt there, you’re all gonna be McDead.

oughtn’t it read “Fwindle’s”?

You know, all of this pic work Fightin’ Amish is doing for you appears to be keeping him from updating HTRB. I need my Anagramaticus, man.

A mention of Dennis Erickson without the photo of him driving the golf cart into the volcano? What happened?

Antoine Winfield’s crime is time?

Don’t think you can throw a bunch of links down with a fun border and think you can get away with it.

Arizona State’s schedule lends to the lofty ranking. Eight home games, an OOC of San Jose State, San Diego State, and Colorado, and we get USC, Cal, and the rivalry game at home. Phil Steele thinks we can start 8-0, and if he says it it’s gotta be true. The final 5 games are Cal(HC), at UCLA, at Oregon, USC, and Arizona. If ASU goes into that stretch 7-0 and splits those games 3-2, it’s hard to keep them out of the top 25, no?

I can’t buy into any Wake hype—they lucked into a lot of close wins (see: the Duke game), and there wasn’t much good to take out of the Clemson and Va-Tech games. They were definitely one of the worst “BCS” conference champions of the last five years; if there was ever an argument to only include the six highest-ranked I-A conference champions in BCS games, 2006’s Wake and Boise are the perfect examples.

SMQ -

Is the Midlake album really that good? Back when we were starting up DeadOn, I got spammed by people promoting them and it sorta soured me on them. However, if it’s as good as advertised, perhaps I need to give it listen afterall. In the meantime, back to Robbers and Cowards.

Midlake really is good. They’re like a really talented, modern day Fleetwood Mac (that was supposed to be a compliment). Excellent musicianship and dreamy songwriting makes them a cut above.

damn – they’re even Jebus Approved™. For once, I shall abandon my morals and give fair listen to that which I was spammed about.

My Patronus is a Twinkie.

Re-read your Steele, my man. Steele 2007 5:14 – Wake was outgained by 57 yards per game in ACC play last year. Their conference title was a fluke of the highest order, especially taking into account the fact that they were only one game better than half the division and they beat a stumbly-wumbly Georgia Tech team for the title in an unwatchable 9-6 game. Get ready for mid-table obscurity this year, which will probably keep them close to the top of the ACC, anyway.

Jerkwheat – They are good but if you’re gonna abandon your morals don’t do it for music. Take the easiest gal from the office to lunch, get 3 margaritas in her, and go after her like JoePa on a bowl of tapioca.

So I picked up NCAA 2008 on Sunday, brought it home, and had only my girlfriend to play against.

She’d never played a football game before, and outside of the Wii, Pikmin, and Animal Crossing, hadn’t really played video games before.

She ran back three interceptions on me for touchdowns.

“Take the easiest gal from the office to lunch, get 3 margaritas in her, and go after her like JoePa on a bowl of tapioca.” – I’ve been considering such things myself recently but am weary of post-coital fallout.

Ah, so Drew Weatherford’s net handle is “Boy Howdy”

Cold War Kids are great. From what I hear they also put on a helluva live show. Album overshadowed however by “The National” which I bought at the same time. See also the new “LCD Soundsystem” Album.

Brian – That’s what camera phones are for. Nothing buys silence like a snapshot of her snatchshot.

Jebus – Gross. Stop. Now.

I know Mike Groh only has one season under his belt at UVA, but can we at least provisionally declare that Hiring Son As Assistant Coach = Bad Idea, somewhere to the north of having a gun in the house with kids but probably at least as bad as "Normally I wear protection, but then I thought, ‘When am I gonna make it back to Haiti’ "?

Was this written by the EDSBS people or T. Herman Zweibel of The Onion? Just curious.

Jebus, there’s someone from HR here to see you. they said something about a hostile workplace environment…

It’s that darn chubby Asian girl from marketing – she’s practically begging for those margaritas

Nicely done, PW@17.

My Patronus is Lee Corso’s head on Phil Fulmer’s body, but that’s from what the doctors call “the retardations.”

I can’t speak for Midlake’s work as a whole, but ‘Van Occupanther’ is that good. I only bought it because of the album cover (I’d never heard of the band) but I haven’t been able to keep it out of the rotation for more than a few days at a time since Christmas, and it tends to stay there for about a week.

My patronus is porkloin

I’d like to see what Phil Steele’s error rate is. Seriously is there even a reason to watch the season? Read his magazine and you pretty much know what’s going to happen. Every year I try to pick one out (like FSU here) and say, “Naw Phil’s got it wrong this time,” but every year he proves me wrong.

Re: #28

Cardiac-

Phil got pretty much the whole big east wrong last year from what I remember…

Sluts Dept:

#14, #16, #20, regarding liquored up bimbos, I would suggest you just take out Lindsey Lohan or Brittany Spears. They come already pre-liquored, and who knows what else. Actually, the post-coital thing would really be something with ’em two….

An out gay friend of mine once said that any straight man could be talked into accepting oral sex from another man. He told me that all he had to do was invite a straight guy on a weekend camping trip. After a few hours of fishing and drnking beers, he’s just lean over and say, “Hey, man, want a blow job?” He swore the method was infallible.

I posited that it was not the method that was infallible; it was that any straight man who was willing to go on a weekend camping trip with an openly gay man was likely to be willing to accept some hanky panky.

I submit to you, gentleman, that any woman who drinks 3 margaritas at a work lunch with a handsome young coworker is either an alcoholic, in search of an excuse to get down with someone she shouldn’t, or looking to get fired. In any case, handle with extreme caution— and remember that women can use cameras, too (see also: Stefan Postma.)

The only problem with a crotch shot on a camera phone is that unless the boss has also seen her crotch (perhaps possible), its circumstantial. Still fun to show around at parties though, I suppose.

As an aside, I think there may be an older broad stalking me. Every time the lady walks by, at least once or twice a day, she looks in my office and smirks.

“We vont ze money, Lobotzke!”

And SMQ’s preview of the ACC is nothing short of epic.

#21: There’s nothing wrong with hiring your son as assistant coach, just as long as his name is Steve Spurrier, Jr.

#32-The mercury Cougar comes highly recommended. You will definitely learn something.

TCOAN,
  here is a delightful essay about the idea of turning guys over (with a few alternatives besides fishing and beer). I’m gonna go out on a limb and call this one NSFW. It is somehwat funny and sad.

http://www.viceland.com/int/v14n4/htdocs/gay.php?country=us

harry fucking potter? really?

I would hope based on the preponderance of the evidence that points to my sheer stupidity that no one would take my advice on office relationships (or anything else for that matter). I would also hope that no one takes photos of anyone’s crotch with a camera phone, ever. That area does not photograph well and should only be shared in person, with lights dimmed. I will take the rest of my comments of this nature back to Fleshbot where they belong.
Thank you.

TCOAN:

I have not worked with a woman that would have three drinks at lunch. The only woman that I have worked with that was an alcoholic would want to fight after getting liquored up, and that happened only at after work parties, so there were no takers there.

I seriously doubt that someone would have three drinks and then get back to work…. acting like Foster Brooks…then getting canned.

So were all of Bid Daddy Drew’s short stories supposed to be humorous? Four were, tops.

 I guess if you drop enough f-bombs and cuss words then you’ll get laughs from the majority.

I seriously doubt that someone would have three drinks and then get back to work…. acting like Foster Brooks…then getting canned.

Plainly you haven’t spent much time working with federal government clients. Except for the getting canned part.

Three drinks and going back to work can be done, but I can’t recommend it as a lifestyle. Those usually wind up being the days where I rearrange things to “experiment with enhancing my productivity”.

I miss the days when I had a lab to hide in, and my boss didn’t have access to it. I never took proper advantage of that situation, I must confess.

1. Dave K:

  Really? Please explain. I don’t have anything to refer back to. Rutgers?

Guys, I don’t recommend taking nudie camera snapshots and then trying to use them as “leverage”. It’s a federal offense, actually—ask my last unit’s chaplain, who is getting hammered for it.

http://www.armytimes.com/news/2007/05/ap_chaplainaffair_070509/

Orson, I went to Notre Dame and I was anything but sedate at those games.

DCT has it right. I think every senator is required to have a fully stocked liquor cabinet in their office. Well aside from the really uptight Republican ones.