Survival is a matter of ingenuity, preparation, and psychology. Remember, you may have to drink your own urine, or eat maggots off a dead deer, or even dirty up your new iPhone to survive, you sad, pathetic iDork.

But if you do this…you will survive. And that’s the name of the game. And if you don’t like it…GO PLAY INTRAMURALS, BROTHER!!! Go play intramurals.

Picture corrected courtesy of Red Devil EA, who gets 100 COCKTAILS for his effort.