FULMER CUP: BOWLING GREEN BRAWLS AGAIN.

Dude, you’ve never assaulted or menaced someone over a chick? That shit is fun!!!! …and does kind of show undying love, no?

I remember the first time I tried to convince my ex that the reason I put my fist through a window was because I cared about her so much …unfortunately she was the daughter of a psychoanalyst and didn’t really take to such explanations…

This was all the work of Suss—

“perhaps grunt out some kabuki mucilage” and “who’s already undoubtedly done everything you could have possibly done with her anyway”…two more reasons why I come to this blog. Duh. My wife would be proud.

1. - After his criminally low seeding in the HBB, can you blame the poor guy?

OPS – I blame the HBB Trickeration that Texy confessed to.

Also, they clearly didn’t take “avatar-smithery” into consideration.

Seriously, where are the stabbings? Is passion dead?

Plus, if you’re going to show Dwight and the pepper spray, you really need both volumes (despite the bad editing):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GTFLHkjy1M

THREADJACK!

I just had a great email-conversation with a buddy of mine, concerning a band he found on the internets. The name of the band is “Alabama Thunderpussy.” Here is their myspace page:

http://www.myspace.com/atpva

Anyway, I posed the following question: buy sell—“Alabama Thunderpussy” would be a great nickname for Saban…but would it be better for Tubberville? His response was:

“buy for saban
 
sell for tuberville. He’s just a regular puss. Any team that nicknames their stadium after 1990 can only have a puss for a coach.”

I think that “Alabama Thunderpussy” is a great nickname for Saban, as (much like this band) he scares me, he brings the thunder, but he’s also a bit of a pussy. Thoughts?

How about “The ’Bama Backdoor Butt Bomber”?

ANOTHER THREADJACK!!!!

Orson, Stranko et al: I am writing to voice my disappointment with the student ticket sale by Penn state Athletics this morning via ticketmaster. While the university claims tickets were on a first come, first serve basis, I waited in that damn Ticketmaster que from 9AM to 950 when the 20,000 tickets were sold out. Now nothing against the Queu but my roommate didnt joing the queu until 915 and my friend didnt join until 930 and they were both still able to get tickets. Line jumpers in State College would have been branded assholes and sent off to where the buckeyes dont shine. As a long time reader (way back before Jenny Slader dared to do his “Simpsons as College Football Teams” bit) I want EDSBS to do an inside investigation as to how this traves-sham-mockery of a ticket sale could have happened. Does anybody else out there in Student Football Ticket Land hear my pain?

Where are you PSURob and PSUgirl to hear my cries of anguish?!??!?!

“Thunderpussy” fails to evoke any football oriented images in my mind… it does, however, bring to mind other orificial auditory emanations…although on a magnitude greater than any I have witnessed.

Who punches someone in the back of the head?

I think Kabuki Mucilage would be a better band name than Alabama Thunderpussy….

Best all time, Skanky Zambrano…

There needs to be a band named “Mississippi Rumbleclam” so The Orgeron won’t feel left out.

How could you expect anything associated with Ticketmaster not to be filthy and corrupt?

Thank you oc phil- My nerves are getting calmer- sorry about all the typos above- I need about a hundred cocktails to calm down.

Places to avoid:
1. Kay’s Key West
2. Ziggy Zoomba’s

Threadjacking Continues— Not even a “mecy posting” of the Orange County Ducks winning the Stanley Cup yesterday? They had plenty of speed, hitting, and scoring. Sounds like a typical date with a ’Bama babe.

Orson- Possible topic for the radio show-

Would you hit Paris Hilton?

1. - Please no.

hoc-key?

/oh, it’s still not funny, even over here

Brian @ 15, at the risk of turning this place into a classier Fark.com, it’s clear that a trifecta is now officially in play…

Wow, I feel absolutely no pity for you PSU people at all.

Letting Ticketmaster get a hold of your tcket distribution policies is bad news, any day of the week. At ND, you just line up and wait to pick up your ticket book with all the season tickets (that’s every game, not two or three per year) with everyone else in the school.

Nothing like getting seats on the 40 yard line at half price.

Yeah no kidding- this is the first time they ever let ticketmaster do it- and judging by the vibe I’m getting from campus- hopefully the last. The price for tickets went from $140 last year to $190 this year- I’m thinking thats from the Ticketmaster rape charge.

Lion4Life – I’m here for you man. Unfortunately, I’m a young alum with no season tix, so $190 for a student season ticket is probably about half of what I’m gonna pay for the ND game.

And yes, ticketmaster does blow.

#17, Paris Hilton:

The more appropriate question would be:

How many beers (or shots of whatever liquor you prefer) you would need before you would even consider doin’ it with Ms. Hilton?

I wonder what was her medical condition that allowed her to walk the streets again. My guess: herpes complex #1,235.

Did somebody say Ticketbastard?

1. apparently bar alliteration=trouble. My guesses for next in line: Silky O’Sullivan’s or Checkpoint Charlie’s.

and #12, Mississippi Rumbleclam just sounds like a terrifying rollerderby team.

Not sure sure about that #24. On Tuesday the forum was split on whether they would hit a leprechaun.

SKLM – They said she wouldn’t eat the prison food and was becoming mal-nourished… BFD.

Lion4Life – $190 !?!?!?… are you kidding? For student tickets?… Bama student tickets (and I assume this is similar across the SEC, though I may be wrong about that), are about $40… for the whole season. Oh, and they’re doled out through the interwebtube thingys to reduce cost without having to resort to TicketAssMaster. If Al-a-bam-a can use the internet, PSU should be able to as well.

UGA’s are $8 dollars per home game and the FLA game is something like $30. However, after many years of people skipping classes and the riot police having to be called out last year ( let it be known that all these were people who already HAD tickets guaranteed via the internet sign-up) at the ticketpick-up, they are spreading it out over a few nights this August. Actually, Orson, student tickets at various colleges would be a GREAT article. I know that USC students think they get the shaft. UGA’s are actually pretty good, it was just the pick-up that would get you killed if you are weak.

We don’t take too kindly to sluttery around here.

PUNCH HIM AGAIN MARQUES!

Oh, and Jerkwheat, at least it wasn’t Jerry Seymour’s girlfriend.

USC had the greatest system for student tickets back in ancient times when I was there. You bought a coupon book with a pass for all athletic events (besides football), a yearbook, and a coupon for each home football game. Then the week of the game you would go up to the ticket office and turn in however many coupons your group had and get an envelope with that many tickets in it. So you didn’t have to decide who you were going to sit with for the whole season.

Ticketmaster is the prime example of why a monopoly is a bad thing.

The Mighty Ducks? I guess the hockey strike ended at some point then. Did anybody not of the frozen northlands really notice or care?

Pigs and Ducks Dept:

A. Pig ’n Pokey: Paris Hilton, according to internets site TMZ, was going nutso in the pokey. Purely brainiacle, not physical. There were no rashes and stuff. I think Matt Leinart is now feeling a lot better.

B. Mighty no ’Mo: The Ducks got rid of the “Mighty” portion of their name before the start of the season. (Owner Henry Samueli announced the name change prior to the 2006/07 season.)

LIke former Kings owner Jack Kent Cooke once said, trying to explain why with 900,000 Canadians living in the L.A. area, his hockey team couldn’t draw crowds: “The Canadians in L.A. are the people who left Canada because they hated hockey.”

Good God, what’s going on in BG? Did anyone click on that link O provided? Look at all of the other headings below. “Man rapes boy, marijuana found, dead woman in apartment identified, dead womam in house identified, etc.” And I thought Toledo was Detroit, Jr.

Drogue,

Wait a tick… are you asking if I would hit Paris Hilton, as in with a tire iron, or are you asking if I would “hit that shit” if you know what I’m sayin’ wink wink?

Yes on the former, no on the latter.

#34

The National Tractor Pulling championships aren’t until August. There really isn’t anything else to do in BG until then.

SKLM,
You’re telling me Jenn Sterger is right up your alley, but Paris isn’t? I don’t need beers, but I’d need about $19 million dollars. …OK I’m not gonna lie. I could use a few beers. And a condom wouldn’t cover it. I’d need a full body suit.