THE WEEKEND THAT WILL BE: MEMORIAL DAY VACAY STARTS...

by Orson on May 23, 2007 4:15 PM EDT

...nowish, actually. We'll be up in the mountains of North Georgia this weekend, starting early tomorrow and doing absofuckinglutely nothing for five days that doesn't involve Zubrowka Vodka, the liquor that ensures we never, ever forget Poland.

Tomorrow we'll auto post LOLQBS and Texas Gal's guide to making love to a Texas Longhorns fan--bring your spurs!--and Friday's Cheesecake will also be, like your mother on New Year's, pre-loaded. Other than that, there will be no manic in-day posting until Tuesday, as we are going to be sitting in a hot tub and re-reading Holidays in Hell and I Lived to Tell It All: The George Jones Story. Did you know kidnappers once tried to overdose George Jones by "forcing spoonfuls of cocaine" up his nose? Did you know that you can't overdose George Jones? You do now.

We'll attempt to overdose on lethargy over the next five days or so. Suspecting that it can't be done, but we'll try. And no, we're not taking a bike. Those things will fucking kill you dead.

Man break bone die funny!

Take care, --O.

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Zubrowka eh? My Memorial weekend festivities will also be heavily influenced by Polish vodka. In this case, Luksusowa.

Enjoy!

by BDoc on May 23, 2007 4:55 PM EDT reply actions

for the love of all that is good, don’t tell me you observe that yankee holiday.

by kleph on May 23, 2007 6:08 PM EDT reply actions

I’m being forced to go to something called a “Padres game”. What the hell sport is that?

by Holly on May 23, 2007 7:55 PM EDT reply actions

I’m headed out first thing in the a.m. for Miami, so I won’t be around to say howdy and get raked over the coals for my post- but I swear to check in at the earliest opportunity and accept my punishment for falling short of King Orson and Queen Holly.

They serve hard liquor at Marlins games, don’t they? I sure hope so, because I’m going to FOUR of them. God help me.

by Texas Gal on May 23, 2007 8:21 PM EDT reply actions

i think in involves a lot of prayer, holly. but, whatever happens, just be sure to follow my one rule: never wake up in tijuana.

by kleph on May 23, 2007 8:57 PM EDT reply actions

1. I have seen Texy’s post, and she is a liar. It’s awesome.
2. I, too, have a Never Wake Up In Mexico rule, but I broke it last weekend, to my detriment.

by Holly on May 23, 2007 9:20 PM EDT reply actions

You guys are really on to something with the sexually suggestive football talk! The phrase I use below ought to be in the How To Make Love to a WfnVa Fan guide.

TCOAN, with your new job’s new riches: Make it rain!

Enjoy the long weekend, Orson.

by Kakistocrat on May 23, 2007 9:43 PM EDT reply actions

Kleph,
By the way, your comment was pretty good. Us Northerners celebrate Sherman’s birthday this Monday. Screw anyone from Atlanta!

by Kakistocrat on May 23, 2007 11:22 PM EDT reply actions

Moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo AgEwe

by NewAZTiger on May 23, 2007 11:51 PM EDT reply actions

I’ll be hanging with my buddy Ron, smugglin’ some weed through the airport and findin’ a new place to watch the pooches play.

by C. Portis on May 24, 2007 10:02 AM EDT reply actions

Can’t wait for the Texas Longhorns post, since I am attending a Longhorn wedding in Austin this weekend, and dear baby jesus, please let my dreams come true.

by Brian on May 24, 2007 10:05 AM EDT reply actions