LES MILES SAYS HELLO SHREVEPORT!!!
Waiting to get a read on Les Miles? We’ve got the word: flaaaaaky. Has sugar problems. Potentially born without a governor on his inner monologue, and not in that mad professor way like Mike Leach, but more like a sugar-crazed regional manager going nutsini at a quarterly reports meeting.
(”I WILL TEAR THIS PHONEBOOK IN HALF TO PROVE TO YOU HOW SERIOUS I TRULY AM ABOUT EXCELLENCE!!!”)
Miles dropped the F-bomb in reference to Alabama. And when we say the F-bomb, we mean fuck, as in “fucking Alabama,” the answer he gave to a question about LSU’s biggest rivalry. He can be confused for Godzilla. He lets it rip! He seems just a pace out of step with most public speaking situations, which leads us to our story.
Miles missed a trip to Monroe, Louisiana last week due to bad weather. Being the nice professional that he is, Miles addressed the crowd gathered at the dinner via cellphone. (Again, non-SEC sports fans. These are adults standing rapt around a cell phone talking about football. You don’t take this shit as seriously. You just. Can’t.)
Miles opening line to the crowd he couldn’t see? “I look forward to getting to Shreveport to see a lot of friends.”
HELLLOOOOOOO CLEVELAND!!!!
It’s ok, Les. Dangerous Toys did the same thing during the Monsters of Rock tour in Shreveport, and everyone was so hammered no one noticed. And they were HUGE, man.
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1
tOSU_radar says:
Did they have the cell phone turned up to 11?
May 21st, 2007 at 7:20 am
2
irishoutsider says:
Do me a favor. Just kick my ass, okay? Kick this ass for a man, that’s all. Kick my ass. Enjoy. Come on. I’m not asking, I’m telling with this. Kick my ass.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:30 am
3
maskedavenger says:
Did the Marquee for the dinner read “Puppet show and Les Miles?”
May 21st, 2007 at 8:36 am
4
Out of Conference says:
Maybe it’s a cry for help- you know, kind of like tying a cinder block to your feet and jumping in a pool but subconscienciously knowing the rope is long enough to let you reach the surface and cry like a baby for help.
May 21st, 2007 at 8:44 am
5
RaginCajunRebel says:
OOC: Or maybe he’s just a fucking idiot. That seems to be more the case these days, Melfi.
May 21st, 2007 at 8:47 am
6
Tarpon says:
Maybe he’s just a fuckin’ idiot. Historically, that’s been the case…
May 21st, 2007 at 8:48 am
7
Out of Conference says:
Well, no chicken parm or pizza for him now.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:12 am
8
alt.black.helicopters.ncaa.oneworldgovernment says:
So if each team can have only one archrival, which program has the most teams considering it their archrival? Lots of teams have no one who considers them an archrival. Alabama probably has three teams that consider it their archrival: Auburn, LSU, and Tennessee. That’s somewhat remarkable. Are there any other teams out there that can out-rival Bama’s collection of major program rivals?
May 21st, 2007 at 9:20 am
9
Orson Swindle says:
The X-Men, perhaps?
Alabama’s really only got one and one rival alone: Auburn. The rest are just gravy.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:21 am
10
CapstoneAlum says:
Saban already has that Wolverine “I don’t have time for this shit” attitude…he just needs to grow some sideburns..
May 21st, 2007 at 9:26 am
11
DevilGrad says:
“Are there any other teams out there that can out-rival Bama’s collection of major program rivals?”
Duke basketball?
May 21st, 2007 at 9:34 am
12
Orangeblood says:
Would that make Coach O the Hulk?
I’m guessing Notre Dame has the most rivals.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:35 am
13
nmbeck20 says:
Everyone in the Big Ten calls Michigan their “rival” we truly only care about Ohio State, but we let the rest of the little guys think they matter too by fighting over litle tokens such as the Brown Jug.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:41 am
14
jeff says:
My wife would argue that while Alabama is A rival, Florida is THE rival for Tennessee.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:42 am
15
maskedavenger says:
Other rival-laden programs: Michigan with OSU, MSU, and ND; Texas with Texas A&M, Oklahoma, and Arkansas (even though they don’t play much anymore); and Oklahoma has Texas, Oklahoma State and Nebraska.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:51 am
16
Cincy says:
Notre Dame has their fair share…
USC, Purdue, Navy, and BC off the top of my head.
granted only one is an elite program, but all are long-running.
Also, if you look at longevity of a rivaly as part of the criteria, LSU doesnt stack up to Tennessee or Auburn.
I think most schools are doing pretty good if they have 2 elite rivalries on schedule.
Also, you have to consider if BOTH sides consider the game a rivalry. A good example is Oklahoma/Okahoma St. Sooner fans will NEVER give OSU arch-rival status ahead of Texas and Nebraska, while OSU fans look forward to their game with OU all year.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:57 am
17
RaginCajunRebel says:
LSU has Ole Miss, maybe Bama, and allegedly Arkansas.
May 21st, 2007 at 10:04 am
18
PJ from NU in SF says:
There’s a Venture Bros. quote that should go here, but I don’t have time to look for it.
May 21st, 2007 at 10:16 am
19
crabs says:
What about FSU\Miami FSU\Florida?
Which rivalry is considered bigger by the Noles?
May 21st, 2007 at 10:23 am
20
War Eagle says:
The Jelly School is a historical rival, but in recent times, LSU is THE school to beat for Auburn. And maybe FLA. Part of what makes a rivalry good is that the schools are on the same level of competition.
May 21st, 2007 at 11:06 am
21
Tarpon says:
LSU’s biggest rival is anti-incest legislation….and maybe teeth
May 21st, 2007 at 11:07 am
22
Dave K. says:
Yeah …maybe LSU and WVU should start up a series and have the winner take home a giant trophy in the shape of dentures…
May 21st, 2007 at 11:20 am
23
SCarSucks says:
Georgia’s got UF, UT, and AU all in legit rivalries, plus GT if they were ever good and Clemson (even though they beat us regularly when we play, and we haven’t played regularly since the 80’s…).
May 21st, 2007 at 11:23 am
24
MCab says:
RCR, don’t forget Tulane, for what it’s worth . . .
May 21st, 2007 at 11:54 am
25
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
Rivalries, Rivalries Dept:
USC has the following two very good and different rivalries:
1) ucla: Each year this is the game for the mythical Los Angeles City Championship. For young people and students, this is the game of the year. It splits the City, with most going for USC.
Although it is a “City Championship” the population of Los Angeles, including the immediate surrounding area would dwarf most State populations.
So, while Alabama-Auburn might be a good “State Championship” , it is only for a State that has 4.5 million people, about half of the greater LA area.
2) Notre Dame: While college football rivalries are regional, this is the only rivalry that is national. Most old fans consider this to be USC’s top rivalry. When I lived in New York, even the jaded ones there showed some sort of interest in this game. However, I think for ND students, according to a Notre Dame grad radio talk show “personality” in LA, Domer students consider Michigan as their chief rival.
Personally, I used to think ucla was the better rivalry game, since the week before the game all sorts of rivalry related stuff was going on. However, at this point, I would have to rank the ND game as the better rivalry game since it has more interesting facets or implications (recruiting, coaching…)
May 21st, 2007 at 1:09 pm
26
oc phil says:
USC has Notre Dame and three other instate rivalries, UCLA because they are close, Cal because they are good (lately) and Stanford because they are the other big private university in the west. Of course Cal and Stanford’s primary rivals are each other.
May 21st, 2007 at 1:28 pm
27
sandman227 says:
SKLM,
The problem with your UCLA/USC comparison to the Alabama/Auburn is this: virtually every one of those 4.5 million people in Alabama have an opinion/interest in the ALA/AUB game, and statistically none of the 9 million residents of LA care about the USC/UCLA matchup.
And, yes, I lived in LA for a year: noboby there gives a shit about college football except transplants from other states. That’s why every sports bar down there has between 6-15 OSU fans camped out for football-Saturdays
May 21st, 2007 at 3:03 pm
28
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
Enter Sandman Dept:
You have a good point that fans from Alabama are probably more passionate about ‘Bama-Auburn, than USC-ucla fans. Probably due to the fact that there is nothing else going on in Alabama (sports-wise) that is of any consequence. Sort of like a small town in the boonies that just looks forward to and comes to life during the Friday night high school football game.
But, you are totally wrong saying that statistically none in LA care about the USC-ucla game. Offices get split, kids in schools argue about the game and every newscast has some sort of story about the game. Not to mention that the game gets excellent TV ratings. Check this out, in LA we have other things to get into such as: Smog, Earthquakes, Fires, Flash Floods, Paris Hilton/Lindsey Lohan& Other Sluts, Fake boobery, Vegans, Liberals and Arnold Schvvvvvartzenneger.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:46 pm
29
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
OC Phil:
USC-Cal is a good, recent game. Not a rivalry.
Stanford is a joke. I have never met anybody who gets excited about this game.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:49 pm
30
sandman227 says:
SKLM,
I resent the hell out of that: we’ve got plenty of sluts in Alabama too…..
May 21st, 2007 at 4:04 pm
31
sandman227 says:
But I’ll be honest, I lived there in 99-00, which was UCLA’s most recent heyday. Never talked to anyone excited about that game or any other, for that matter. In fact, I remember sitting in a sports bar in Northridge to watch the UCLA/Bama game in 2000, and only seeing 3 UCLA fans. Not that the place wasn’t packed: it was filled with Big 10 fans of every stripe.
OSU, Michigan, even an MSU fan…..made for an unsightly crowd by LA standards. Burly, unshaven, pasty white faces with bloodshot eyes…..and I don’t even want to talk about the men….
May 21st, 2007 at 4:27 pm
32
Bruce Dickinson says:
In the SEC it is simply “who your fanbase hates the most.” It can go outside of the conf. Historically it is the following:
Ala – Aub, Tenn
Aub – Ala, UGA, LSU
Ark – Ark is limited by geographic limitations. Has always viewed Texas as its rival (Tex has not returned the favor) Ole Miss and Ark had a heated rivarly during the 50’s and 60’s. Ark still feeling its way – LSU/Ark seem to building one but it hasn’t been in the conf long enough to figure out who it hates the most – right now it appears the most vile thing to the Ark fanbase is Houston Nutt.
LSU – historically LSU’s two biggest rivals were Ole Miss and Tulane time has faded both – conf is attempting to create a rivarly between LSU/Ark. LSU had a good rivarly with Fla and Ala. Over the past decade LSU and Aub’s rivarly has heated up.
Ole Miss – views LSU as its biggest rival but MS St is.
MS St – Ole Miss (claims Bama as a rival but see Ark/Tex above)
East
Fla – UGA, (Fla St), LSU
UGA – Fla, (Ga Tech) Aub
Vandy – geographically UT but really no fan interest means no rivals
KY – UT (see vandy above) – (Indiana)
UT – Ala, then Fla
So Car – clemson is its biggest rival
May 21st, 2007 at 4:37 pm
33
Stacy Keibler Luvs Me says:
Yawnnnnn…..Pac 10 Rivalries:
#32: Interesting information. Pac 10 Rivals are quite predictable and based on reverse propinquity, whatever that means:
1. So Cal: USC – ucla
2. No Cal: Cal – Stanford (Cal has some sort of rivalry also with their little brother ucla, being part of the same statewide university system. However the hatred bruins have for USC is not matched by anyone else, by far.)
3. Oregon: Oregon vs. Oregon State
4. Wash: Wash, vs. Wash St
5. Az: Ariz vs. Ariz State
May 21st, 2007 at 7:06 pm
34
oc phil says:
SKLM: Agreed that the Cal and Stanford games are way below ND and UCLA as far as rivalry games, but the traveling fans give the game something extra compared to other Pac 10 teams (the schedule is set up so that each of the SoCal schools plays one NoCal team at home and one NoCal team on the road, so all 4 schools get a nice road trip every season). And while Stanford is a joke now, there are times such as when Willingham was coaching or when Elway was playing that they have been good.
Sandman: Part of your problem was that you were in Northridge, do people in the San Fernando Valley care about much besides producing porn? The other issue is that you were talking about UCLA fans.
I can only think of one USC game I’ve ever watched from a bar, that just isn’t a big thing to do in SoCal.
May 21st, 2007 at 8:25 pm
35
Jeff from LA says:
I’ll agree that USC-UCLA can’t compete with Auburn-Alabama in terms of intensity of fans, but let’s be honest – who really does? I mean, if a blogger wants an easy way to add 50 comments to his post, he should either A) trash Alabama and praise Auburn or B) trash Auburn and praise Bama. Michigan and tOSU are a big rivalry, but trashing UM/tOSU and praising the other would not come close to producing the same result.
On the other hand, the rivalry means much more today than it did in 99-00 because both teams are much improved. I mean, even Auburn fans might have difficulty selling out their field if Paul Hackett coached their team.
May 22nd, 2007 at 12:17 am
36
NewAZTiger says:
SKLM, do you know how long it takes us Alabamians to screw everyone in our family? We don’t have time for that other shit.
May 22nd, 2007 at 4:33 pm