Blogtoberfest: a tureen of other people’s information wrapped in fresh EDSBS field bacon. Mmm…tureen.
Erik’s got his ownAll-Name team for the SEC, and it’s strong, strong stuff. As for the king of all monikers, there can only one winner, and it’s special, indeed.
So many things to do in a day,
And oh so little time.
YouTube isn’t exactly helping
But yet–it’s soooo sublime.
Words fail to describe the arak-pure love we have for this…this masterpiece of Flash animation. Just when comedic fatigue is supposed to set in, Houston Nutt reappears on the screen wailing in a Bee Gees falsetto. A whole two minutes of that would have been enough, but Mike Shula being set on fire completes the opus.
Just watch it. It’s…it’s everything that’s awesome about being an SEC fan, minus that pesky hookworm infection and skin cancer.
Again: this is a required presentation by Human Resources. That is why it is long and boring! Pay attention or face sanction at the hands of Manny, the sketchy snack bar guy downstairs who you suspect does not wash his hands adequately! He will serve you a filthy Reuben, and it will perturb your bowels like a thousand of Morbo’s offspring dancing in your duodenum.
We begin part two of your human resources briefing, which we have titled “The People in Your Neighborhood.” This is an attempt to humanize this process by making you associate it with the cuddly, warm feelings of your pampered television childhood. Coffee has been provided, as have starchy, sugar-infused pastries located on the tables.
Morbo suggests you sit down and enjoy part two. He will be watching and attempting not to feed on your stinking but still nourishment-rich flesh.
Morbo from EDSBS HR suggests you listen.
Jeff Tedford, Cal.
Status: retread? The biggest message board prediction of 2005–that the spread option wouldn’t work in the SEC against fast defenses–may have been true with a slight geographic twist and a tweak of the timeframe. the spread didn’t work against defenses in the Pac-10 in 2006, or at least not to the liking of coaches.
Despite having significant success at Oregon, Gary Crowton’s modified spread attack is now downloading into the brains of LSU players. The Pac-10’s other spread convert was to be Cal, who hired Northwestern’s Mike Dunbar to come in and tweak Tedford’s offense to bring a whiff of the spread to Tedford’s already productive NFL-style offense.
Doing this seemed like giving Serena Williams an ass-lift at the time–an exercise in superfluity to improve something which looked just fine to begin with, frankly. Perhaps the thought was to utilize the more “athletic” talents of Joe Ayoob, a run/pass threat more suited to the spread attack, with all those pesky variable runs out of the shotgun.
Ayoob turned out to be a musketeer, spraying shots in every direction and capable of missing a wide open man with flair that came dangerously close to being a talent in itself. With Nate Longshore (a more traditional quarterback in the Tedford system) running the spread at Tennessee to start the season, the whole experiment went from an orderly mess with a potentially explosive catalyst like Ayoob to being something closer to Kentucky’s offense, a quasi-spread of short routes, ineffective shotgun runs, and three-and-outs.
The hybrid still racked up points, as Cal’s wont to do. But aside from a four game stretch of absolute carpet-bombing Minnesota, Arizona State, Portland State and Oregon, the offense’s productivity went down as the season went on, most notoriously versus USC in a 23-9 loss. After the Oregon State game, Cal’s quarterbacks didn’t pass for 300 yards once, not even against the cuddly, enabling pass defense of Texas A&M in the bowl game.
Dunbar’s return to the Big Ten and the job running Tim Brewster’s offense at Minnesota now ends the awkwardness, and also guarantees that Minnesota/Michigan will be a bonified shootout, since spread sets seem to be offensive gonorrhea for Michigan (discomfort, pain, burning sensation–all there.)
Jim Michalczik is listed as the offensive coordinator on their website, but classic Tedford should be back in vogue in Berkeley, naked protesters be damned. (more…)
DC Trojan , though we swear up and down that we were on the same track and merely slower with the Gimp and Google Image search: the infection of college football bloggery by the lolcats craze was only a matter of time.
(If you have no idea what this is, a better explanation may be found at I Can Haz Cheeseburger than any we could possibly concoct. Even then, there’s no real explanation besides the ol’ eyeball test. You find it funny, or you don’t. Don’t talk, watch!)
Our first humble attempts at LOLFTBL follow. We will preface this by saying that we have seen Brian’s initial attempt at this art form, and that it is funnier than anything we’ve put together here.
Perhaps it’s a broken verbal agreement with a wannabe sports agent? That’s our guess.
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Orson Swindle and Stranko Montana are two men pushing thirty who should know better than to run a college football blog, but evidently don't. Both graduated from the University of Florida, and both agree that college football is far too important to be left to the professionals.
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