Mustaches as a sporting accessory peaked in early 20th century baseball, though early 1980s NASCAR gave the national pastime (cough bullshit cough) quite a challenge. If you’ve never seen Dale Jarrett’s donut mop from the period, you’re missing a classic of the genre.

For unironic, modern day ’staches, though, it’s difficult to trump the accomplishments of cricketeers worldwide. A sport encompassing both India and Pakistan is going to have some excellent lip protection going on, but they’re not alone–seemingly every major national cricket team boasts a strong delegate to the Legislature of the Lipcozy.

We salute you, gentlemen. Given how long a cricket match takes, we bet many of these materialized whole during the course of a three-day test match.

Merv Hughes, Australia (retired). Bonus info: Wikipedia describes “Big Merv” as “a notorious consumer of alcohol and food.”


Superb ’stache. Good for filtering gallons of beer through.

Navdeep Poonia…um, Scotland? Yes, Scotland. And yes: Poonia.


Poonia. Titter.

Dave Whatmore, Coach. Bangladesh. Whatmore? With that sexstripe, we can’t ask for anything, sir.


Whatmore? How ’bout this: HAPPY MUSTACHE WEDNESDAY, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!