FULMER CUP BOUNTY: GEORGIA SCORES, SOUTH CAROLINA FINDS DOWNSIDE OF PACIFISM
by Orson on Mar 26, 2007 3:41 PM EDT
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PrintPosting picks up a-plenty today as soaring temperatures around the nation bring people out of their homes and into the well-furnished jails of our nation.
Georgia. On the board for what we're forecasting as a point for being pulled in via a "fake ID dragnet" in Athens. Warrants have been issued. Roadbloacks set up. Snipers have been posted. Whatever happens, it still can't be as embarrassing an offseason for Athens area law enforcement as last year's Ninjagate. It is early, though--there's still time for them to pull a Jim Dangle and turn this thing around, dangit.
South Carolina earns no points but provides a cautionary tale of avoiding the fight and subsequent Fulmer Cup Points. From the Sporting News via Chas:
Sorensen, 20, was hit over the head with a beer bottle at a downtown Columbia restaurant Saturday as he turned to walk away from a fight with 25-year-old Christian Ernest Beyer, according to a police report.
Spurrier took his usual sympathetic tone in dealing with the incident:
"He had a little injury downtown," coach Steve Spurrier said. "Y'all didn't hear about it?"
We salute Sorensen for walking away from the incident. Even if you manage to stay conscious after getting hit with a beer bottle, the results aren't pretty or compatible with leisure activities not included in "Chuck 'The Iceman' Liddell's Guide to Fun." It is compatible with this statement, however: "Tha's redneck right therr." We can't imagine how many souls' last words heard on this earth are those. We do know how many of them are wearing sleeveless t-shirts--every last single one of 'em.
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From the video:
“That’s the price of ignorance right ‘therr’”
“Last time we said a branch hit ‘em on the head. They didn’t buy that one.”
Somebody needs to inform these guys that, when repeated, ignorance becomes stupidity.
by Rockytop85 on Mar 26, 2007 4:56 PM EDT reply actions
“slap some duct tape on ’err”
rednecks are a source of unending hilarity
by Aaron on Mar 26, 2007 5:04 PM EDT reply actions
I am Baaaaaaack!!!!! Dept.
Seeing that good ’ol boy whack himself with a beer bottle is like seeing a man marry his ex wife again. The idiot knows the beating that he is in for, but goes through with the deed anyway, stupidly.
by Stacy Kiebler Luvs Me on Mar 26, 2007 5:17 PM EDT reply actions
Sorensen needed 41 stitches to handle his “little injury downtown.”
by Chg on Mar 26, 2007 5:34 PM EDT reply actions
Offtopic, but did ya’ll see Jaws is going to call MNF this season? This makes me happy in my jock.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/football/nfl/03/26/bc.fbn.mondaynightfootb.ap/index.html
by Pappy on Mar 26, 2007 5:50 PM EDT reply actions
UGA’s crimes: Underage possession and a fake I.D. charge. The horror! Man, this is some lightweight stuff.
Glad I wasn’t on Fulmer Cup watch in my day. I would have wrapped this puppy up by now single-handedly!
by Because They Can on Mar 26, 2007 5:55 PM EDT reply actions
Ooops Dept.
I have been gone for so long, that I misspelled Miss Keibler’s last name. yikes!
by Stacy Keibler Luvs Me on Mar 26, 2007 6:04 PM EDT reply actions
If you go thru the UGA PD’s list of arrests, shortly after the fake ID evildoers, you will something just as impressive…
a DUI at 8:29 PM on East Baxter Street by one Melodey Elizabeth Pinard, female visitor
by kbjarvis on Mar 26, 2007 7:21 PM EDT reply actions
what those rednecks dont know is that in the movies they use a bottle made from sugar or really thin glass specially made.
by Brian on Mar 26, 2007 8:00 PM EDT reply actions
Hey its just good training to toughen up his head for collisions in the game.
by Harry L on Mar 30, 2007 10:27 AM EDT reply actions
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