EDSBS LABS PRESENTS: FOOTBALL 101 BETA

Excellent opening tutorial.

The Peace Corp is undoubtedly now moving to draft you into service, putting your skills to work in Malaysia where you’ll certainly be asked to make that part of the world safe for truthiness, instant replay and commercial apparel.

I hope you’ll consider actual game breakdowns as the 2007 progresses. Nice job O!

Excellent work… but it needs a telestrator. And XBOX 360 footage.

I’m going to use this to tutor my boyfriend, who does not care for sports that don’t involve bikes and large bunches of rocks but who has sworn to accompany me to games this fall. Excellent work.

May I suggest that those of you who would prefer Xbox 360 footage make a small donation to the EDSBS fund via the Paypal tab up on the top right?

Hell, I’m going through a busy time at work right now, it won’t matter too much if Orson doesn’t come up for air for the next two months. :^)

yeah i’m still waiting for my credit on the second picture in the Alabama Spring Practice post….

That was a great tutorial. When Orson was talking about the safeties I remembered the 2004 UM-OSU game when Ernest Shazor (SS) was creeping up to the line and I said to myself, “Fuck, he’s gonna get burned deep.” And he did … by Anthony Gonzalez … who was a freshmen at the time.

No explanation of why the “split end” is so named? It’s not “archaic.” For shame. I remember, not so long ago, certain Ty Willingham coached teams mistaking the designation as “archaic” as well. Those penalties were a laugh-a-minute.

Otherwise, well done.

Fantastic. More, please.

Holly—your boyfriend sounds like a huge pussy. Just sayin’.

I liked it, but all the panning and shifting and zooming got me dizzy. But maybe that’s just me.

Perhaps use the the xbox backdrop and use paint or something to draw lines, arrows, etc, on the various players (a la Madden) and cover up the glowing white circles.

Then, add the subcommandante for ‘color’ on the audio.

That would put the gravy on the cake.

d.tensor: Who needs the subcommandante when you can just use ‘Ask Corso’ to inject an ounce of idiocy into the proceedings?

Free safety NOT free to do whatever he wants.

Not a bad intro but I kind of wonder if its condescending to your primary demographic ie people who have seen more than one college football game in their lives?

RaginCajunRebel—S’what I get for dating A Yankee. He’s willing to learn, though.

Chris L.,

whoops – my bad – sorry

Corso uses words and sentences -

I was imagining
“bam! and boom! and pow!” in a nasal Ohio voice

Stephen, we’re starting with root basics and going forward from there.

Fair enough… speaking of archaic I used to coach under a guy who would put H down for cornerback if he wasn’t thinking about it. Old single platoon terminology.

No mentions of the glorious “tackle eligible”? Everyone loves watching those fat bastards catch the ball.

This is an excellent start – although it’ll still be lost on substantial amounts of my fellow Brits who will be attending the Giants/Dolphins game in October expecting to see Dan Marino and Phil Simms battling it out on the field rather than in the broadcast booth.

Sensible suggestion: which hole numbering system are you going to use?

The flanker and split end are somewhat different positons – the split end has more blocking responsibilities, usually. And halfback is really an archaic terrm – that fellow is usually refered to as the “tailback”.

MSK—Orson uses the 2 hole exclusively. At least that’s what I would assume.

Rajun’ – only when the glory hole is not available.

Dream on, Stephen sweetie. ;^)

Well, as one of the ignoramuses (ignorami?) from the broadcast in question, I certainly appreciate the effort. In the meantime, I have at least read up on the difference between a 3 – 4 defense and a 4 – 3 defense, and for about 20 minutes I could probably have told you what Cover-2 actually means, beyond that it’s a formation that allows Dwayne Jarrett to pick up 40 or so yards on 4th & 9.

Billy Packer used the term “defensive halfback” in a basketball game this weekend, Stephen. I couldn’t believe it. It was at the end of a half, Georgetown and North Carolina, possibly, and the inbounding team heaved the ball the length of the court with no time, and some guy knocked it away under the opposite basket. Packer goes, “[Insert player name] made a great defensive halfback play there! He could be a two-sport star!” Jim Nantz added he hoped Butch Davis was paying attention (neglecting to mention Butch Davis was just diagnosed with cancer, by the way). Seeing as how rare the term ‘halfback’ is even used on offense these days, how long has it been since Packer watched a football game? Does he think they’re still platooning?

Great work! One eensy thing: ’splain to the viewers at home what the “box” is.

Great job. I’ve really struggled to explain the game to some female and/or foreign friends of mine. I’m going to run this by them and see what they have to say. Please keep it up. And if you should happen to be in the market for an Xbox360 (includes NCAA Football 07!), please email me. I’m looking to unload mine.

Excellent, excellent, excellent.

Great job, gentlemen.

A little off topic, though I think Orson at least will appreciate this:
Theisman is being replaced by Jaworski on the Monday Night Football booth team.
It is still a shitty set up, but I look forward to seeing if Jaws in game analysis is as involved as I hope it is.
I know this is a college site, but I thought some people might care.

So the target demographic for this lesson is six year old girls in the South and “Our team r00lz!” Pac-1o’ers that discovered the game enough to follow a final score shortly after Pete Carrol was hired?

This is an exceptionally cool idea. One thing, though: you might want to get someone who knows the rules to check these over, because you got a couple of pretty minor mistakes in there, concerning the restrictions on the interior linemen. I can do this if you want, drop me a line.

For the record!

1). The interior linemen are allowed to take a hand-off or a lateral. They cannot go past the line of scrimmage on a pass play, nor can they be the first player to touch a forward pass. They are required to wear a number between 50 and 79 (the only college numbering rule) and are referred to as being ‘ineligible by number’.

2). However, there is no requirement for a lineman who is ineligible by number to be ‘covered up’ by an eligible reciever: that’s an NFL rule. Therefore, there is also no need to put an eligible reciever on each end of the line of scrimmage.

1. beat me to it, but halfback hasn’t been used for years (at least since the demise of the wishbone). Beano Cook excepted, of course.

Nice job on the elementary presentation in general. I would never have the patience…

So the target demographic for this lesson is six year old girls in the South and "Our team r00lz!" Pac-1o’ers that discovered the game enough to follow a final score shortly after Pete Carrol was hired?

Well, I can tell you from experience that my 4 year old daughter finds football boring; she prefers soccer because the uniforms are more colorful. So this post is wasted on her.

As for your other demographic, I had been ignorant of many football basics for years before Pete Carroll was hired, and I find that it has never affected my enthusiasm for the game.

In fact, I put it to you that in an era of truthiness and spin, expertise is entirely unAmerican. I was just ahead of the curve.

To the commenters who are complaining that Football 101 is too simple—

I just want to let you in on a secret— all women, regardless of sexual orientation, are helplessly attracted to men who brag about their football knowledge and look down on people who know less. We intuitively sense that you’ve picked up that impressive knowledge during all those hours you spent crashed in front of the TV, recovering from the strain of dragging around your enormous balls.

Really, it’s true.