THIS...THIS CAN'T BE REAL. PLEASE.

Let the backwardness begin!

Alabama football…Kentucky basketball…nothing surprises me anymore.

Both of these kids are going to grow up and go to Auburn just to get back at their parents.

Huskers on the board, in a very soccer-mom way:
http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=2808843

Might as well name someone April May June or Polly Esther.

Any of you want to take a guess how many kids down here are still named Herschel every year? At least he won a championship for the Dawgs. Saban hasn’t done anything but poach recruits so far at Alabama.

Red, meet Neck. No surprises here.

As an Alabama fan, I’m conflicted. Being rational, it’s clearly insane to name your child after a football coach of a team you cheer for. Being a football fan, it’s clearly insane to name your child after a football coach WHO HASN"T WON ANY GAMES AS YOUR FOOTBALL COACH YET!!! I strongly doubt it, but what if Saban makes us wish we had one of the 3 Mike’s still?

RedDevil,

  Nice, but it’s news like this that makes me wish that Osbourne had stuck around till the advent of the cup. Hell, Switzer too. Imagine getting to watch the two of them battle for the Big 8 title during the season and Fulmer Cup title in the offseason. The competition would be, in a word, fantastish.

Tyde isnt too bad, but Saban???

This brings up the awesomeness of someone who no doubt named their sons “Hunter” and “Fisher.”

Of course, there’s no mention whatsoever of either of the redneck parents ever having actually attended a class in Tuscaloser, much less graduating.

Like I said, no real surprises here…

shit, i’m just glad they’re not fans of pacman jones

So what happens when Saban gets fired in a few years? Does the kid get to change his name? I would think he’d have to in order to avoid childhood cruelty. So will he get to choose his next name? Will it be like Big Daddy where he’ll proclaim himself Frankenstein??? Because that would kind of serve his parents right. Or will he be required to take the name of the next coach?

So many questions….

You’re right. Tyde isn’t too bad, mainly because later in life he can shorten it to “Ty” and no one will know any different. It will however suck for Little Saban when he goes to kindergarten, and in his first year, Saban loses to Auburn again to move to 0-6 against the War Eagle PlainsTigers. That poor kid will get beat up just for his name.

I went to middle school with a guy whose legal first name was Bear. Of course, he was born in the late ‘70s, so they weren’t risking naming him after a loser… and face it, Bear is just a cool fucking name (unless you’re Colbert).

It’s not limited to Alabama fans, though… I have a friend who’s step-sister and husband (FSU fans in the panhandle) are naming their daughter TimPrince Shell. TimPrince because the father’s name is Tim and if it had been a boy they were naming him Prince… and Shell… because that’s where they met… a Shell station

Orson, by the way, you should go read Saban’s press conference from yesterday, it’s classic… interesting references to a guy “making pizza” during conditioning

Neither of those kids’ names passes Frau DC Trojan’s “4th grade playground ass-kicking invitation” test. It’s the bammer equivalent of “Willow” and “Serenity.”

As for Sam Keller, I am shocked, shocked that he would be getting into some kind of petty, beer cup throwing incident. Shocked.

living in tallahassee…i’ve come across several kids named bowden. you know i’m not joking.

An Alabama fan named their second born after a guy who still smells suspiciously like corndogs? I think I would have waited until his first BCS bowlgame. By then he should have taken on that wonderful smell of hobo and old shoe that Tuscaloosa provides…

Is this wrong? If so, please don’t tell my little ones: Knitt Annie and Patrick Erno.

I’d say it depends on the beatin’ up thing. While I’d say 40% of the state fans are loyal to Auburn, they are not dispersed evenly. There are alcoves of ‘bama fans and hives of auburn fans in different areas. I’m not sure what the predominance is in “Hartselle”.\

Hey, this is bad I know. But it’s not as bad as I think two years ago, where a father SHOT at his son for “mocking him” after another loss in the Iron Bowl.

How many Bammers went to the courthouse a couple of years ago to change their kids’ names from Fran to something else?

Quick poll question: When Nick Saban leaves to become the next coach of the Dallas Cowboys four years from now, will the Witts retroactively change their youngest son’s name to

a) Mike Sherman Witt
b) Jimbo Witt, or
c) Jeff Bowden Witt?

How about Nim Witt?

Sorry you already said Jeff Bowden….

Ohhhhh SNAP!!!

Hook ‘em, he had a blood alco level of like .18 and he shot the kid for stealing his car… it just happened to be right after the Iron Bowl… don’t help the press

Orson, before the Super Bowl the News-Sentinel did a feature on Knoxville-area parents who’d named their kids Peyton in the last twelve years. There were over a hundred, and that’s just the ones that got mentioned in the paper. Go Vols and all, but…cree-pay!

I find the quote: “I’m gonna make sure he continues to bleed crimson” particularly instructional. Child services, anyone?

I like the licensing and marketing opportunities, “Time now for Saban’s afternoon snack break, brought to you by Little Debbie”.

I have a friend who once talked about naming his son Daniel Stephen but, alas, he didn’t go through with it.

roll tide motherfuckers…you’re all just jealous of our traditon and shit

25- I thought the BAC .18 was simply “understood” after the Iron Bowl. Didn’t know about the car thing, but I’m sure the kid deserved it. wink* wink* nudge* nudge* say no more. . . .

Anybody know if there are any kids named after an aubie coach. If I was named after Tubs as a kid, I’d put a shotgun in my mouth as soon as my legs were long enough for me to toe the trigger.

I notice that the article didn’t list Saban’s middle name…is that because it’s ‘Coonass’?

I am beginning an online petition on behalf of the semi-intelligent people of this state to have the University of Alabama moved to Mississippi……

Mark is right… someone is missing out here… if someone’s going to pay $10M to get the blue turf at Boise State named after their company, why couldn’t parents start selling their kids names???

Marketers are always trying to reach a younger audience. Think about the advantages of all the kids in school calling out “Hey Home-Depot Jones, come over here”… actually, the Witts should call Proctor and Gamble and see if they can get any money for naming their kid Tyde… maybe they can sew a patch on all his clothes…

Oh my bad…it’s Hardin; thank god.

1. - check your kitchen, I think your pot just picked up the phone to call my kettle.

Then again, my kids know a number of boys named Cameron. Most of them, big surprise, have parents who went to Duke.

Does this mean there was an unfortunate three or four week span where “Price” was a popular name?

The scariest thing for me is that i’m a Hardin from Alabama and i think i am probably related to those ’tards …so embarassed.

1. — Would a fan of Pacman Jones name the kid Glock if it’s a boy and Beretta if it’s a girl?

I shall name my first son Ragin.

My freshman year at Ole Miss, there was a girl there named Tyger. She also had a sister who was an Auburn cheerleader, and her middle name was War Eagle. Tyger transferred to Auburn after 2 semesters. Also, the Auburn license plate on her car, which I’m fairly sure was a MUSTANG, read TYGER.

Classy.

I see nothing wrong with this. My first child is Steven and my second is Orr

I know a Gopher Hockey fan who named his daughter Mary Ucchi (I think that’s the spelling he used). Just depressing. I think all people like this shouldn’t be allowed to watch their favorite team for a year or two.

Walker and Texas Ranger send their regards to this family.

Gotta love ’Bama fans.

Just when you think they are out of the fanatical stereotype of the South cliche someone names their kid Tyde or Saban and pulls them back in. hoooya!

Someone will advocate this as an argument for the prevention of mini-season ticket holders in the future. They will say there should be a test, so as to keep the tailgating gene pool at a level only slightly below the university’s minimum entrance scores.

As for what Collier was saying above and what Hook’em also alluded too … go ahead and go with Hartselle as a Crimson town. They have a Stuckey’s and, to the sidewalk alumni way of thinking, what else do you need in life, my good man, beyond 3 shirts for a 10spot? And the traditional pecan log, of course.

I’m guessing they’re also cautious watchers of South Park since they decided against naming the child Big Al.

the real losers are people who say things like: awbarn, tuskaloser, ’tard, and bammer. so 5th grade….

1. - Shut up! War Eagle? That’s awesome. Isn’t this the reason people have children? Just to name ’em.

You just know this kid will end up a rough customer based on the whole “Boy Named Sue” effect.

My question is why none of the names include “Bear” – or Bryant -

It was so cute when Tyde was an infant – during “tummy time” Hannah used to softly cheer “roll Tyde; Roll!”

33-noble idea but that will be a short petition

Next kid Toilet Paper

Dont be silly PSUGirl, even well-grounded parents like these know that names like Bear and Bryant are sooo cliche.

Short petition because they have to be able to sign their name. Or can they just make their mark— X?

How much does anyone want to bet the mother is named after former Bammer OL and NFL HOFer, John Hannah.

Who is the hubby named after? Tim Tebow?

When I did my stint at tOSU somebody there had named his daughter Scarlett Ann Gray after the school’s colors.

I’ll bet that friends or cousins have already used the names bear & bryant – and that’s the only reason why they didn’t – Superfandom has a hierarchy – you must pay homage to the Gods before you flatter the earthly elders.

1. — Only if Auburn packs up and moves to Georgia. I’ve seen that wandering Eagle eye looking at Columbus.

My son’s middle name is Bear, but mainly because my wife is a hippy, wanted an animal name and suggested the only option I’d possibly go along with.

Heck, people name their kids after people on television, every day – why not name them after something worthwhile (like football players on tv) -

A lot of the other examples people are giving here, while obviously a bit fanatical, are reasonable because they are actual names. Cameron, Peyton, and the half million Brodies you will soon see in little leagues all over the state of Alabama are reasonable. Even Scarlett Ann Gray is OK, although it’s pushing the envelope a bit. We came real close to using Auburn as a middle name for our first daughter — it’s even a family name (with no connection to the university). “War Eagle”, OTOH, crosses the line. So where is the line? Somewhwere close to those people last name of Center that named their daughter Haley (true story).

Wow. I don’t know what to say. I’m honored. A little weirded out, but honored.

This going to get out of hand after I deliver a couple of National Championships isn’t it?

Bottagetta,
  If one parent is “Nim”, the other must be “DIM”, the question is which gender is which?

So Matt #30, I guess you and the Bama faithful just claimed ANOTHER Nat’l Champ, due to the birth of Saban? Doesn’t that bring Bama’s total to something close to 1,257 NCs?

My six week old son’s middle name is Bryant. But my wife picked it out. I was actually against it. She hails from Texas and that’s a family name.

http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/news/060926/bride.shtml

These people sound like total idiots….

Signed,

Frank Zappa

Once again, in-duh-viduals who couldn’t find the library on campus are somewhat embarrassing my alma mater.

I’d really like to go back about 35 years, and explain to Coach Bryant why a pro football team in Birmingham (it was possible then) would be a good idea.

Why can’t they just watch NASCAR and WWE and leave my university out of it.

#57……

I didn’t know EDSBS was so popular.

I just recieved a threat of legal action from the Attorney General of Mississippi if I continue my on-line petition…..

Naming kids after active coaches?

Didn’t we cover this already?

Can’t wait for daughter “Crimson”.

Wow. Damn good thing Rich Rodriguez turned ’Bama down. The 4th grade playground beat-down possibilities would be endless for a kit named “Rodriguez Witt”.

There’s a kid in my son’s class named after Tuberville – Smug Bastard sits right behind my kid.

You know what bothers me the most about this? It’s T-y-d-e with a ‘y’.

Other things:
Taking a French name like André and insisting on spelling it (in English) with an accent.
JaJuan. So I’m supposed to pronounce the first ‘J’ the English way and the second one like it’s Spanish.
McKenzie = not a first name.
Brady = slow.

1. - I thought It was scarlet and primer? (does like Diceman) OWWWWW

1. …. You might be a redneck if you spend your day calling other people rednecks and you spend your whole life obsessed with Bama instead of your own team.

But I bet your chicken thought it was correctable, that he saw improvement, and that he was getting better and better…

I know two girls from Birmingham with the following middle names- “War Eagle” and “Bluer”, which was legally changed to “Tiger” after the Bo Jackson years. “War Eagle” went ot Georgia and it made national news, she was also featured on ESPN’s Gameday. Never knew what happened to “Tiger”- swear on my life this is true!

My little (325lb) brother had a LARGE black Labrador named “Jay Barker” back in the middle 90’s.

Sweet animal. Only came in from the wild once or twice a week.

Paterno Jones: What you may not know is that many Alabama sidewalk alumni spell phonetically.

The future waste of oxygen’s name, therefore, would be “Crimpsun.”

Please click the link and feel free to comment:

http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/news/060926/bride.shtml

Hear the radio interview with the Dad on Finebaum:

http://www.finebaum.com/media/interviews/20070323Tim_Witt.wax

Nick Saban has a history of leaving teams. They’ll be pissed off when he leaves Bama in 2 years.

Will Collier whacks off livestock.

Roll Tide.

the reason nascar and wwe can’t be exclusive to inbred swine is that row tahd university is sammiched between nascar and wwe for their favorite 3 things to mouth breathe for.