SPRING PRACTICE COMPENDIUM: HOT HOT HOT.

by Orson on Mar 13, 2007 11:04 AM EDT

Spring practice reports by team leading off with the Hot Hot Hottest team in the land.

Appalachian State! Not division one, sure, but they are opening with Michigan this year. Armanti Edwards has a great, pseudo-fashion-inspired name, but do not fuck with the Mountaineers' quarterback: he made the hit of the day, leveling cornerback Justin Woazeah on a reverse. Take heed, Wolverines. Take heed.

Florida State: They have like, at least three receivers on the play. FSU's offense revelling in having plays, a playbook, and schemes involving more than two receivers on a play.

"It's rectangular, but you can open it up and there's all this stuff inside," says backup qb Xavier Lee. "And you won't believe what the coaches want us to do at the line. It's nutty. It's unlike anything I've ever seen at FSU."

Missouri's offense: late-blooming. The Tigers' offense done got blowed up during their practice.

No one rocks your ass like George O'Leary......who rocked it by starting with PATs in UCF's 2007 spring debut. Fuck yeah!

Georgia may have a wide receiver. Sean Bailey, recovering from injury, has looked sound thus far, giving Georgia something they've lacked for a while, a real live wide receiver.

Boise's qbs in a scrum. Boise's looking to replace Jared Zabransky, and it's a three-way fight for the job. Chris Petersen may just solve the whole thing by playing with three qbs in the backfield; he's the only coach who could actually pull this off, judging from the Fiesta Bowl.

Cal's practices are closed. And Tightwad Hill could care less, which confirms his status as a real, live Pac-10 football fan. SEC fans would be bribing their Air Force buddy who flies surveillance over Afghanistan to swing halfway around the world on taxpayers' money to snap a couple of quick shots of that new formation they're installing up in Knoxville.

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Appstate is in Division I … DI-AA, FCS, whatever you want to call it. I’m an alum. I think they can surprise Michigan. That might be even better than a third straight FCS title.

by Celeste on Mar 13, 2007 12:02 PM EDT reply actions

god no. i can’t take another year of furman losing to app state. at least we can do the “that’s alright, that’s okay, you will work for us one day” chant.

by adam on Mar 13, 2007 12:23 PM EDT reply actions

Uh, not to rain on the parade, but that article on UCF is from last year (dated 3/26/06). Oh well, put anything with the Team America song and sandwich footage and it still works.

by Smyth on Mar 13, 2007 12:35 PM EDT reply actions

I would not have expected the first comments in this thread to be App State/Furman smack talk.

Um, Georgia Southern rulez!

by Rival on Mar 13, 2007 12:38 PM EDT reply actions

Smyth—

Damn Google Reader. Noted.

by Orson Swindle on Mar 13, 2007 12:38 PM EDT reply actions

Orson, what makes you think the Air Force buddy would need to be bribed?

I thought that’s why the military pays $400 for toilet seats.

by Phil K. on Mar 13, 2007 12:48 PM EDT reply actions

Nah, the $400/toilet seat profit goes to various assassination attempts and other types of cool shit you see in movies like Commando.

by rob on Mar 13, 2007 1:08 PM EDT reply actions

Oh, I so have to score tickets to the Appalachian State opener now. It promises to be so much hot, hot, hotter than Vandy was.

by Dave on Mar 13, 2007 1:59 PM EDT reply actions

Re: #7

I’m pretty sure paying $400 for a toilet seat doesn’t net the government any sort of profit.

by pw on Mar 13, 2007 2:10 PM EDT reply actions

The "that’s alright, that’s okay, you will work for us one day" chant at a App St. vs Furman game? What kind of bizarro world is that from? That has it’s place in basketball games involving just about anybody vs. Duke or in hockey games involving just about anybody vs. Harvard, but a Furman football game?

by HFS on Mar 13, 2007 2:22 PM EDT reply actions

What? We haven’t had a new formation in Knoxville since . . . well, when did we start playing football again?

by Rocky Top Talk on Mar 13, 2007 2:24 PM EDT reply actions

Poor X. Lee doesn’t know that Bobby only has eyes for one girl, and her name is Drew.

by Gator KK on Mar 13, 2007 2:30 PM EDT reply actions

Re alleged Mountaineers working for Furman alums someday chant; I never heard that one, but if that’s how they cope, I’m okay with that.

Re Dave; Must we open that wound again? sigh Yes, buy your ticket. If nothing else, you’ll get to see a 165-lb QB run the spread against a real defense. I hope against all reason that it will be a good game.

by Celeste on Mar 13, 2007 3:42 PM EDT reply actions

while it never occured while i was at furman, mainly because we always beat app state, it did occur quite frequently at my high school’s basketball game. for some reason a boarding school for rich white kids didn’t do too well. though dee webb is an alumnus.

and it totally wouldn’t be out of place at furman. it’s a damn good school, unlike boone community college for hippies.

by adam on Mar 13, 2007 4:22 PM EDT reply actions

My Furman football experience was limited to testing the boundaries of what they mean by “dry” campus, gowing sick of the marching band Hendrix purple haze, and trying to figure out why we needed a real live Paladin on a real live horse, a stuffed man-in-suit-Paladin, a purple clad grim reaper, and a wizard (!) – that’s right, 4 mascots. I’m sure they’ve added something inflatable by now, and I’m still pissed about Ingle Martin slipping on the one.

by Ltrain on Mar 13, 2007 4:42 PM EDT reply actions

I see your hippies jab, and raise you a Time Magazine College of the Year Award, circa 2001.

http://www.time.com/time/2001/coy/master.html

Back to football, Armanti Edwards is just the 5th DI player to run for 1000 yards and pass for 2000 in one season (joining Vince Young, among others). He did that as a freshman, despite redshirting for the first 1.5 games. And—-assuming Michigan’s defense doesn’t break him into two 80-lb pieces—-he’s probably just going to get better. My condolences go out to Furman, et al. Us ’Neers are enjoying our day in the sun.

by Celeste on Mar 13, 2007 5:02 PM EDT reply actions

I assume the DoD reports they pay x amount for y things. Thus, $400 toilet seats. I’m saying they actually pay $25(or whatever they cost) and the rest of the money goes to awesome shit being blown up.

by rob on Mar 13, 2007 5:33 PM EDT reply actions