Yeah, it’s early…but how can one sleep after looking at Eva Green’s dress at the Oscars, which didn’t resemble a dress so much as a dress that had, after suffering grievous injury, been covered in several rolls of cheap gauze after suffering severe burns. Either that, or the oft-naked Green appeared naked at the Oscars sporting one wicked fungal skin condition.


Eva Green, seen here wearing the sewn-together corpse of three disparate dresses, is often naked in her movies.

We’re pounding Two Buck Chuck right now (curiously sold for three dollars at our local Green’s Liquor) trying to get the vision out of our head. Call it alcoholism, but at least we have bad Oscar dresses to blame. Poor University of Georgia naif Akeem Hebron has no such excuse–he was arrested for underage possession of alcohol at 7:59 a.m. Sunday morning in Athens.

Hebron may additionally claim in his debut rap jam that his party indeed does not stop ’til eight in the mownin’.

The score gives the Bulldogs their entry in the Fulmer Cup with one point,, and is indicative of the down-home variety misdemeanors cuddly Georgia tends to rack up in college football’s second most dubious award. (The first? Troy Smith, Gino Torretta, and, um…Danny Wuerffel.) Bulldog fans take solace in the fact that this did not involve the perennial bugbear of UGA football players, the suspended license charge, and that Mudcat Elmore’s cursed car was not involved.