Remember that no matter how far you may think a team is off the map of college football, someone, somewhere, loses productive work time thinking about how much they hate them.

These little microrages surround you: somewhere, there’s someone who hates San Jose State with a blazing passion. In a tiny house in rural Ohio, there sits a soul whose heart festers with malice, all of it directed towards Bowling Green. We bet there’s someone out there who just fucking detests Florida A&M, and not just because they suffer from serious band envy. There’s even someone who hates Ohio University, seemingly innocuous Ohio University, the one nestled in the deceptively serene town of Athens, Ohio.

His name is DevilGrad, and he runs MiamiHawkTalk, the mightiest D-1 smallball board of them all. Today he should be dancing a meringue in his loafers, since his bete noire makes their 2007 Fulmer Cup debut after a stellar 2006 season. The offender: Kris Luchsinger, freshman defensive end, charged with resisting arrest and (primo charge here, emphasis is ours) persistent disorderly conduct.

Both are misdemeanors, bringing with them an award of one point each. For the entire incident, we award Ohio University 2 points for their early and auspicious entry into the race. Be warned, though: living up to last year’s Bobcats crew presents a truly daunting task for this year’s squad. Start punching those horses early and often, boys.


Ohio enters the race for the Fulmer Cup, prompting bystanders to say “Never mind that shit, here comes Mongo!”