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Around SBN: Jon Jones, Rashad Evans Reignite Rivalry

I'VE HEARD THAT RUMOR, TOO.

Just days after his one man special teams commando show, Jarvis Moss may be facing suspension. This confirms our suspicions that of all the potential IQ scores on a football team, the d-line must rank damn near the bottom, since they're the ones usually caught self-administering herbal cures, FnDC, and stealing gay sheep. Florida's already lost Marcus Thomas at d-tackle to weed/being flat-out dumb earlier this season.

"I’ve heard that too," Meyer said. "We’re dealing with something right now. I’m not ready to announce that...I don’t want to get into that right now, because I don’t know what’s going to happen," Meyer said.

The suspension coincides with Florida's game against Western Carolina, a.k.a. the Battle for the Summer Retirement Home Lot. (Western Carolina being a hotbed for Floridian retirees. In case you ever wondered where Floridians go to retire, the answer is not Cuba. Yet.)


Moss: stumbled.

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When my wife and I heard this on the radio during the ride to work, I said it was probably a result of Moss going out after the game to party then bringing too many grateful co-eds back to his dorm. My wife said she didn’t think the football players should have a limit on the number they could take to their dorms.

by RedRoot on Nov 15, 2006 9:55 AM EST reply actions  

Any rumors as to why?

by OhioDawg on Nov 15, 2006 10:01 AM EST reply actions  

Jane, take a memo:

To: Bernie and Jeremy
Re: smokin’

Gentlemen, the question is not whether we took a few liberties with our female party guests- we did. Your suspensions to us will only do one thing: our draft stock will fall and we will be drafted to the NFL Europe, likely Amsterdam. So while we fully accept the game off against Directional Carolina (god knows we weren’t playing anyways), let’s all just remember who we’re hurting when we don’t buy weed: the terrorists.

Snoogins,

Jarvis

by italiangator on Nov 15, 2006 10:04 AM EST reply actions  

If the infraction was known of before the game against the cocks, that just shows one thing … you boy Urban is a natural for the SEC. WTF?

by Dave K. on Nov 15, 2006 10:04 AM EST reply actions  

wait…isn’t florida the state that old people retire to? and now you’re telling me that the retirees of the retirement state retire in W. Carolina? I’m confused.

by Theri Maa, Bhanchod! on Nov 15, 2006 10:09 AM EST reply actions  

Somebody should create a video of Moss’s leaping blocks synchronized to Cypress Hill’s “I want to get high”.

by RedRoot on Nov 15, 2006 10:16 AM EST reply actions  

Dave K. Test results were not known until tuesday

by Mack10zie on Nov 15, 2006 10:18 AM EST reply actions  

Wait. He got caught playing pool outdoors?

On another note, I don’t remember Indo making me play chess that fast. I remember staring at my Hibiscus petals for an hour and feeling like I was walking upward at a 28 degree angle, but no newfound Russian chess expertise.

by SeaTrojan on Nov 15, 2006 10:46 AM EST reply actions  

Go Catamounts! Defend the glory of the great state of Western Carolina!

by NDTom on Nov 15, 2006 10:59 AM EST reply actions  

When you grow old in Florida, you don’t retire to Florida! My parents already have the house in Highlands, and I can’t wait to spend holidays there.

by adam on Nov 15, 2006 11:09 AM EST reply actions  

We may have to rethink weed being a performance enhancing drug. Moss was obviously high as a kite to block that kick.

Oh wow… I’ve shamed even myself with that pun

by Jgator on Nov 15, 2006 11:13 AM EST reply actions  

If your urine sample is half full, does that mean you’re a “positive” person?

by kidproquo on Nov 15, 2006 11:17 AM EST reply actions  

Nice link Orson ot the Oregon State story. I thought that was just another story out of the ‘Onion.’ Somewhere there’s a joke in there combining the Beavers beating the Condoms and then taking a victory lap with lab sheep.

by Geaux Irish on Nov 15, 2006 11:25 AM EST reply actions  

Our D’line has had a chronic, uh… chronic “problem(?)” dating back to Big Money Warren.

The Gainesville Green still lives.

by brink on Nov 15, 2006 11:26 AM EST reply actions  

Somewhere there’s a joke in there combining the Beavers beating the Condoms and then taking a victory lap with lab sheep.

The Beavers go bareback with the sheep, and any woolly victims of tough love are promptly turned into lambskin condoms for making sweet barnyard love to the co-eds…

by DC Trojan on Nov 15, 2006 11:30 AM EST reply actions  

I smell a 12 step program in Jarvis’ future. Reefer Addict.

by Mormon T. Suxorz on Nov 15, 2006 12:16 PM EST reply actions  

35 inch vert and STILL GETTING HIGHER!!!!

by Gator Head Funnel on Nov 15, 2006 2:04 PM EST reply actions  

Good job Urban, one game against Western Carolina. You just granted him a vacation.

by Dave on Nov 15, 2006 2:43 PM EST reply actions  

If the results weren’t in till Tuesday how did the rumor start on Monday?

by Mark on Nov 15, 2006 2:47 PM EST reply actions  

Duplicity Dept.:

Reading the Notre Damies attempts to make fun of someone else’s cream puff game, when they have a whole season of them is the ultimate act of hypocrisy.

by Stacy Keibler Loves Me on Nov 15, 2006 2:53 PM EST reply actions  

Tested positive 3 weeks ago, says the rumor. Good thing he was available for South Carolina, eh? Y’all best watch your six or Urbie is gonna turn you into Miami and we’ll see Tebow posing with Ak-47s.

by Mick on Nov 15, 2006 3:21 PM EST reply actions  

Gator Head Funnel—points to you, sir.

by Orson Swindle on Nov 15, 2006 3:29 PM EST reply actions  

He ought to be suspended for the FSU game — that would at least give the impression of propriety. They don’t get rid of Jeff Bowden until the end of the year, so It’s not like Urban would be risking anything.

by ND_Rumpus on Nov 15, 2006 3:52 PM EST reply actions  

Hey, I found these grapes and they taste pretty sour, but I’d like to point out the convienence of the one-man, special teams disaster that is Jarvis Moss being suspended AFTER the Carolina game but just in time for Western Kentucky. Yeah……nothing fishy about that at all. And, I’m sure that had he not been allowed to play the results would have been the same. But it’s a mute subject because Urban Meyer doesn’t allow druggies on his team….after the third time they’ve been caught, and they ran their car into the president’s house, and then asked him for a light.

by Cock_Moore on Nov 15, 2006 4:24 PM EST reply actions  

Yes, #25, yes! Meyer knew that Jarvis would block 2 kicks, including the game-winner, and therefore he let him stay in, to fulfill that destiny! And it’s obviously not a mute subject, b/c we’re still talking about it. But it might be a moot subject.

by italiangator on Nov 15, 2006 5:23 PM EST reply actions  

What- are you people ALL on DOPE??? By the way- Jeff Spicoli just verbally committed to the Gators. Urban promised him some tasty waves and a cool buzz.

by Mr. Hand on Nov 15, 2006 5:51 PM EST reply actions  

You’re right, a 6’6 athletic freak , who would have thought he would have had an impact on special teams against a team with the best place kicker in the SEC. Yeah, that’s crazy. That Urban sure is lucky! Anyway, I’m not too upset, because truth be told the Gators were the better team, they were simply limited by poor coaching.

by Cock_Moore on Nov 15, 2006 9:41 PM EST reply actions  

…nice to see the Urban Legend come down so hard on one of his players. His ship’s been a model of discipline lately, and the Gators will have to weather the storm of the West Carolina Catamounts.

by Will on Nov 16, 2006 6:30 AM EST reply actions  

Micanopy Madness strikes again … why do we bother testing for this? Any UF student who isn’t getting high should consider moving to Tallahassee … of Cullowhee, NC

by Barefeetbob on Nov 16, 2006 8:08 AM EST reply actions  

…why test for it? Because its ILLEGAL. Violation of the law is contrary to the student codes of conduct at every major university— and, oh yeah, it can end up with someone getting tossed in jail.

That Myers’ letting the kid back after a single game, especially since this isn’t the first problem his team has had with drugs in the past two months, says volumes about lax discipline.

by Will on Nov 17, 2006 8:36 AM EST reply actions  

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