CHUCK AMATO SURVIVAL METER

Are The Techies Really the Best team in The ACC?

Wow.

What a turd of a conference.

Now, when is The ACC going to challenge the SEC for Interstellar Dominance (to use a phase Tech fans can relate to)

Chuck Amato is currently at an old-timey Strong Man level of job security. He has been seen victoriously circling the NC State campus on one of those big wheel bikes.

I know I’m splitting hairs here, but a 1954 Latour is probably vinegar by now, and was never anything great to begin with (Broadbent claims that this vintage produced wines that were “chunky, coarse & blunt”). Your Bowden analogy was fantastic, but could have been perfected by substituting Latour’s 1961 vintage (100 points RP).

Dead on assessment Orson. And as a lifelong Nole fan, it’s fucking killing me.
Florida State Football 2001 to ? – Where talent goes to die.

I like how FSU had to rent the NC-Central marching band because they didn’t want to take Marching Chiefs out of “class,” or whatever they call it over there. Maybe they can rent a new offensive coordinator for away games too.

Amato really needs to grow a big handlebar mustache. Also, he is wasting that barrel chest by hiding it under a shirt. I say bare it, Chuck!

If Chuck becomes bowl eligible, at his final regular season press conference he’ll tear his shirt off, Hulk style, and beat his chest while calling out his detractors by name. I’m sure of it.

54 Latour has become the expensive wine label reference du jour, you guys could’ve at least dropped a Petrus reference on us.

Ohiodawg -

If Amato does that, The Orgeron will sue him for infringing his patent, copyright and trademark.

Then The Orgeron will eat him. Three days later, The Orgeron will crap out a better offensive coordinator than he has now. But I digress.

It’s amazing what having a competent QB can do for you. If you watch NC State football (you haven’t, but I do as it’s my alma mater) you’d see that since Philip Rivers left at the end of 2002 it has been a three-ring circus of back quarterbacking in Raleigh. After Southern Miss handed State their asses in Hattiesburg, Amato made the change at QB to a kid who only got a scholly when Brent Schaeffer decided to go to UT instead of NCSU, a team he’d verbally committed to. It took Daniel Evans two years, but he’s the best QB in years in a Wolfpack uniform and under his guidance, NC State finally has an effective offense.

How bout that post game interview on the field with Chesty? I didn’t hear a word he said after “ICE”! I hope he never gets fired. He’s just too much fun to listen to!

Sandow is popularly thought to have died of syphilis, Orson. One can only hope the same fate is in store for Amato.

All this talk in the comments about Amato ripping his shirt off begs the question:

Amato vs. The Orgeron

Discuss.

Instead of burning couches, apparently they burn chemical plants to celebrate.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/10/06/plant.fire/index.html

Even when St Bobby was actively coaching ( longer ago than St Joe), he was a mediocre coach. Only the ’can’t miss’ talent available to Free shoes U made it so most hardly noticed, especially the kissass press. Maybe Jr just con’t overcome the handicap of those genes. “Talent comes to die”, indeed. Bad choice, Lorenzo!

I am a huge FSU football fan. Huge. But you’re right – Jeff Bowden is destroying this program. This offense is painful to watch. Put Booker on USC and I guarantee you he is in Heisman consideration – he is such an electric talent that is not being utilized at all.

Does anybody think there’s a chance that Papa Bowden retires after this season, and the ’Noles go after Mark Richt?

So… Jeff Bowden is normally a terrible offensive coordinator, but has anybody noticed that his playcalling tends to get a lot worse whenever facing Amato and Amato is on the hot seat?

It’s like Bobby Bowden sends a message to him: “We’re not trying to beat Amato. He needs to keep his job. Call plays accordingly.”

Not that Bobby would need to send such a message to make Jeff’s playcalling bad.

Thanks Orson, Amato’s chest has now entered the category of “I fear to look, but I cannot turn away” — rather like Jeff Bowden’s play-calling.

Anyway, now that I can’t NOT notice Chesty, I think he’s wearing some kind of manly corset — that’s why the manboobs wibble so subtly over a suspiciously flat gut.

Amato v Orgeron? I think there would be a lot of high pitched screaming and all that would be left would be traces of funky little chewed up sunglasses on the ground.

oh, and, God is good.

Yeah, Ethelred’s ( I mean Jeffy’s) offense had a certain ancient Saxon battleaxe feel about it, but did anyone notice that the real culprit in Nole loss was the defense of the Frog-faced Mickey Andrews? NC State ran the ball for 150 yards, passed for 190 and just flat-out abused the Nole dbs. The offense sucks, but when the defense collapses the Nollies are in deep organic material.

Footbaw!

Swindle writes: “-this was the FSU offense, a deplorable dysfunctional ballet-”

I would prefer to see a ballet, even a deplorable dysfunctional one, than that thing that currently passes as a college football offense at FSU.

That FSU offense gags more than Texas’ No. 1 Fan – Matthew McConaughey. Here is the link of McConaughey practicing his ‘sucking the big one’ technique.

http://www.tmz.com./2006/10/02/whats-matt-doing-with-his-toothbrush/

Statement release by Pres. Bush, “Your doin a heckuva job Jeffie!”

What, no suggestions for a ’97 Screaming Eagle? Best when mixed with Faygo orange.

Erik @ #1: Look who’s leading the division that NCSU is at: WAKE FOREST. And look who’s bottom feeding: FSU!

I think Amato ought to wear a singlet. And boxing gloves. He is the Strong Bad of college football. NCSU sounds a lot like CGNU.

“Our defense is like so crazy-go-nuts, maaaaan.”

BTW, I was at the USM/NCSU game, being a closeted USM fan. Much fun, esp when USM pulled away.

There’s been some disagreement in Tally about who’s actually calling the offense- Bobby of Jeff- and some grumbling has it that Dad is screwing with son’s offense. Not that it matters- the end result is itsh on a stick. And Saint Bobby won’t retire until JoePa keels over- he wants to keep that record. Which is fantastic news for us Noles fans.

Just remember. Norm Chow has stated that he’d like to have a head coaching gig at NC state. Bowden probably lets it go to Amato so he wouldn’t have to face the evil genius of Chow. Jeff Bowden wouldn’t understand what kind of play calling was going on on the other side of the field.

I love this complete implosion of the Ass Clown Conference. Hey Swofford, how good if you Big East raid looking now? Your only undeated team is Wake effing Forest, and no one in your conference would be within 14 points of West Virginia, Louisville, and maybe Rutgers.

Here’s to an ACC Championship involving an 8-4 Wake vs. a 7-5 Miami and maybe 11,000 people in the stands.

What does Amato’s voice sound like when he gets horse? A combination of Flipper and fingernails on a blackboard would be my first guess.

Georgia Tech or Clemson would absolutely asspound Rutgers, lets not be silly.

was disappointed to see that Chucky is down to like a 44DD. Must be the stress – maybe he’s not eating enough. shriveling up…….might need to get implants pretty soon.

’Dead on assessment Orson. And as a lifelong Nole fan, it’s fucking killing me?

Comment by Joe — October 6, 2006 @ 9:43 am ’

Hey Joe – where ya going with that gun in your hand? just kiddin.

come on man – FSU needs to join the SEC!!!!!!! you are a football school. what were you thiking? hoping to beat Duke in the final four??

Please Nathan,

Rutgers is ranked, and we all know what Clemson does when they see a team with a ranking next to their name GAK! Temple could beat Clemson if you just put a #19 or #21 before their name.