HMM, LET'S CHECK THE DICTIONARY...

Does this hurt his Heisman chances?

In related news, bond has been set at $63.17….

This occurred last night, not Saturday night.

He looks like Julie Delpy.

With worse hair.

Johnny Walker,

PD’sL

The ’Cocks quarterback is named Smelley???

Oh, my head.

Fixed.

really, this is just a good excuse for the evil genius to start smelley. kinda convenient. i’m SURE spurrier wouldn’t have gotten mitchell all hopped up on PCP. that would be above him. i think.

though, really, it’s 5 points fault. the shit i’ve gotten into in the 5 points in atlanta, columbia, and jacksonville could fill a book.

Head of Cocks Yanked!…Smelley now in.

WOW didn’t think SC would overtake Arkansas’ Johnson, Dick & Nutt as the team with the funniest player names!

I heard the new qb’s spunky!

guys. gamecock fan here. this dude has been in more trouble in this bar (Pavlovs, for those of you familiar with the cesspit we call 5 points)…there has been several fights, a running around shirtless screaming incident, and a urinating on the bar incident involving Blake over the past couple years. It finally just caught up to his ass.
Supposedly the bouncer was telling he sucked and couldn’t play quarter back and shit. the suprising thing is that Blake never reacted this aggressively on the field…he only does it after a couple hours in Pavlovs doing the $2 for Tuesday liquor drinks.

Smelley Cock… Smelley Cock, what are they feeding you?

Wow, just more usual Gamecock activity. They need to set up a “Gamecocks Only” block in the Columbia jail. Oh, and HE HAS A FLAT FACE AND ISN’T ANY GOOD AT FOOTBALL. Suck on those eggs USC superfans.

So Powder isn’t playing against Wofford? Big deal.

Here’s a link to a picture of the sucker punchee.

http://www.wistv.com/Global/story.asp?S=5403441

“a man so aggressively white bleach is frightened of him”

Now THAT, folks, is why EDSBS is one of the best blogs about any topic anywhere.

Nah, Mitchell doesn’t look like the kind of guy who would get in a bar fight. To me he looks more like the guy in your A/V department in high school who never, ever saw the sun.

Give him a wispy mustache, a mullet, and some bad teeth, however, and yes, you have the definition of white trash.

Hmmm… “underage girls” can be taken different ways. Is he referring to them being underage as in, below the legal drinking age?

Or is he referring to legal age of consent?

If Mitchell were bringing a bunch of 16-year-olds to the bar with him, well, his problems would be a lot greater than what they already are.

He landed the second punch. The first punch he threw was intercepted.

Bravo, Dawgnoxious.

So Dawgnoxious, does that mean it would take Quincy Carter six swings to land a punch in a bar fight?

“Get me the Becktionary. The rhyming one!

PantsB,
You better be married to be dropping Friends references on a college football blog.

Somebody should have punched the bouncer’s parents for naming him Kylan.

Yep, I set ol’ Blake up, and he was dumbass enough to fall for it. It ain’t hard to get a bouncer to talk a little trash to somebody — just a couple hundred smackers and he was a willing patsy, yessir. So we won’t have Blake pitchin’ it around the lot anymore. It’ll be Chris’ turn. Gonna put him in there and see what happens. He throws a real cayutchable ball, you know?

Dr.StrangeCock, that was BRILLIANT. All hail comment #19.

Was Tom Petty ever in LaGrange? Or maybe Barnes’ mom had backstage passes in ATL 20 years ago.

he’s more translucent than bleached white…

In all of blog comment history, Dawgnoxious’ one-line evisceration of the cracker crack’d tops all others.

Brodie Croyle’s evil albino twin?

Wofford has a junior linebacker named Kyle Horne, but I can’t think of a way to get that into a sentence with Smelley, ’cocks, tackle and sack. Any ideas?

Smelly the Cock brings to mind the 2nd most tasteless joke I’ve ever heard..

“How can you tell your roomate’s gay?

….his dick tastes like shit."

humbly..
jbz

What the article didn’t mention is that Mitchell’s buddy tossed him a beer bottle to use, but Blake wasn’t paying attention and it rolled twenty yards behind him.

he does look like a blonde croyle

I think this is just a ploy on the part of the Gamecock fanbase to assemble yet another rationale by which they can claim yet another “moral victory” over Georgia — to wit, See, if only Mitchell had done this a week earlier, we could’ve started Smelley, who is TEH AW3S0M3 and would’ve beaten Georgia 52-0, etc. etc. etc.

jaybuzz, if that was the second what was the first?

Hey Jaybuzz im pretty sure that joke has plenty of taste

His winning pct vs Auburn is the same as Croyle’s too.

It only took until comment 34 this thread. Looks like the Gamecocks are a lock for 6-6.

I didn’t even realize the Gamecocks still had a college football program. Would you look at that? Wow!

6-6 to 8-4. Smelley will be considerably better than Mitchell in 3 weeks.

Dawgnoxious with the mega one liner!! That was on point!

I don’t know if the gators have heard about this, but Harrell is playing for the VOls on Saturday in his last game of the year.

http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060913/SPORTS0601/60913021

I was actually in Five Points last night and I managed to miss this…Can we get a phone tree going?

That kid sure has one weird-shaped head… and he’ll look 100 times worse when that frat-boy combover turns to pure baldness in a few years. You aren’t fooling anyone but yourself there, Blakey boy.

Dr. Strange Cock is the typical Carolina fan. Quincy is gone. The 2006 season is underway. We’ve beaten you five years in a row and y’all are gonna be in the company of Vanderbilt and Kentucky this year. Carolina fans always reference games from years ago b/c they’ve had nothing significant happen in years. It’s like George Rogers just graduated and you didn’t get embarassed at home by a better team. How can you even talk trash after getting your ass handed to you? Did you hear the post game w/ Spurrier. He called his own team a bunch of “dumbasses”. I think it’s a good way to describe USC football and its fans.

Jeez,

The MOST tastlesless joke I’ver ever heard??

(Not for those among us with delicate sensibilities)

“How do you get a dog to quit humping your leg?

…………………….. Pick him up and suck his dick!!!"

sorry folks, I don’t make em up-and “Comment This” kinda asked for it.

Secure in my anonymity..

jbz

Jon, he didn’t talk trash. He made a comeback to someone else’s witty post.

Dawgnoxious is consistently so far from typical UGa fans (such as yourself), I’m often baffled how he ended up in the trailer park in the first place.

Well, well. I did ask for it Jaybuzz. And I’m starting to think that I shouldn’t have. But thanks for answering.

It’s simple assault— no bail set— no arrest on the scene. And the “victim” is a goombah bouncer. Let the man do his 7 hours of community service and play football!

Any advice on attending a game in Columbia? I’m driving down 77 to Brice-Williams for our Thursday night clash. Can anyone tell me where to park, where to avoid, proximity to a Krystal (the restaurant not some undergrad), etc.?

The ony reason he landed the second punch is because a couple of guys from USC’s offensive line were holding the big guy back.

AUAlum, I’d far prefer an undergrad named Krystal to the restaurant of name.

You know she’d be straight out of the trailer and be capable of the kinds of things you only read about in penthouse letters.

AUAlum, here are some good directions. When you get to Columbia, take 26 East and keep going till you get to the coast. Take the week off. Unless you want to get shot/stabbed/mugged/spit on.

Wasn’t that kid Blake Mitchell hunting wolverines with his uncle in Alaska this past summer?

If those are the sickest jokes you guys have heard, you need to get out more.

Jon, if you really want to talk about this year, then Dawgnoxious’ joke makes no sense at all. Mitchell didn’t even throw an interception against Georgia. Neither did Smelley.

Stafford, on the other hand, threw three.

It was just a joke…so I’m not sure why you got all riled up. Georgia won anyway.

Stafford threw three interceptions against Georgia?!

Now THAT’S impressive!

Orson,
Speaking of looking up words in the dictionary, has there been any additional progress against the “Shitbags”? Or are you just going to let them flutter away when they get bored with it in a few months? Just curious.

Yeah i just heard this on the radio a northern colorado back up punter stabbed the starting punter in the kicking leg

http://www.uncmirror.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2006/09/13/45085b868f5df

The way he got caught is great…..

He jumped into his black dodge charger after the stabbing. Shortly after the stabbing the black charger pulled up to a liqour store where the suspect got out of the car and pulled duct type off of his license plate revealing his license plate that read 8KIKR….his number and position!

Tickets to watch the Cocks go 0-5 to UGA in the last 5 games……………………about $250

Tickets to watch the Cocks go 0-5 to Clemson in the last 5 years…………….about $250

Cock fans unique ability to still talk shit to both schools………………….PRICELESS!

Thanks for the update… two days later… after it’s been posted on every major sports news source and most blogs that care… gamecocks…

Hey Seabiscuit, why the long face?

This ultra white on normal white crime has got to stop. What about all the medium white children? what are they to think?

Yeah, I could see how a Clemson fan would talk shit about Columbia — they must be pretty jealous, what with all that electricity and running water they’re missing in the Upstate.

I ain’t frustrated. We did win. It’s just that every time I get into a discussion w/ a Carolina fan, the Quincy threw five interceptions in the 2000 game thing comes up. I know plenty of USC kids and I just get tired of Gamecock fans saying the same thing over and over again, especially from years ago. Anyway, if some one is going to make a joke at my team’s expense, I gotta say something for my team. Just to back up what I’m saying, this article is from last years game. This was sent in to our student paper, The Red and Black, and published the Friday before the game. Notice how he references Spurrier from 95, Dantzler from a few years ago. My point, is that Carolina fans live in the past.
http://www.dailygamecock.com/media/storage/paper247/news/2005/09/09/FootballBlitz/Tobacco.Juice.Hideous.Women.Not.Good.Enough.For.Uga.Win-980186.shtml?norewrite200609141154&sourcedomain=www.dailygamecock.com

Jon,

Thank you for gracing everyone with the typical intellect and ability to turn a good joke into an incredibly poor reasoned argument that most Dawg fans demonstrate.

We wouldn’t want Dawgnoxious’s witty comments to seem like the norm and confuse everyone about UGA fans.

In keeping with the general “Stories from the Trailer Park” theme of this episode … did anyone notice that Blake’s dad is nicknamed “Nugget”? Is he a professional gambler or perhaps a gold speculator?

What grown man with college children goes around with a nickname unless they happen to be a race car driver, a coach, or politician?

http://www.thestate.com/mld/thestate/15513274.htm

Dawgnoxious made a good joke. Dr. Strange Cock’s comback was okay and true, but hackneyed. My whole point, from personal experience, is that USC fans always reference this game b/c it is the last time they have gotten on Georgia and haven’t done much since. My reasoning relies on personal exp. w/ friends that go to USC and the article that I posted. It is the most typical comment from USC fans to UGA fans. How should I stengthen my reasoning?

It has nothing to do with the actual game from last week, who threw how many picks, or Dawgnoxious’ joke. It only applies to the Quincy reference in the Dr.‘s first post. USC will remember the Quincy game in 2000 until they have something better to remeber against UGA and that won’t be for awhile. If he can talk about us losing to them why can’t I talk about us beating them, even if his first remark was merely to make a joke at my team’s expense? Would’ve it been more appropriate to talk trash on another team if it was in a joke?

He loks pretty good if you ask me. Hell, that bouncer is huge and Mitchell dropped him out with one punch?!? I gotta get me some of that man candy. I’m pretty deprived now that Whitehurst is gone.

Yes, USC folk will always talk about the infamous 5 int game and other games of the past because truth be told, most teams/fans do live in the past. Same reason why in the last 10 years I don’t ever remember having a five minute conversation with a UGA fan in which they didn’t say “this is our year” and at some point reference Hershel Walker.

Nice of the Tiger CPA to bring up Heisman chances.. I’m guessing Mitchell’s chances are slightly better than the sum of all of Clemson’s Heisman winners.
Oh yeah, that’s right…. that’s why OJ hid in Clemson- he knew they’d never find a Heisman winner there.