FAN ART CRITIQUE: SPURRIER AND HIS GIANT COCK

Big, buckin’ chicken

You are big

and you are a chicken

I loved this concept the first time, when I saw it on my blog a couple of days ago.
http://dannyfordisgod.blogspot.com

“…Spurrier, the boy genius approaching senescence, sense his potency waning and finds an external referent–quite literally, a replacement cock–to supplant and replace his failing member. The irony is doubled by Spurrier carrying what appears to be a blue dildo, symbolic of his alma mater, in his right hand.”

-This is why you doubled your fundraising goal so quickly.

Or, Chili, perhaps it’s just a variation of our university commercial reviews, our one-time rip off of “Please Steve Don’t Eat It” athletic supplement rules, our reviews of UF’s roster photos, an idea we got from our expedition to Tuscaloosa last season, or an idea we got about twenty minutes ago when John sent us the painting in the inbox.

Or we stole it from you. You decide which one is more probable.

My co-blogger posted the art review on our site and chances are he took inspiration from the same place as you, no biggie, it’s a hilarious concept and fan art, like fan fiction, deserves as much criticism from as many angles as possible.

piss off, chili. these guys have mentioned fan art before. before being roughly two months ago. judging by its quality, when orson and stranko are stealing from your blog it’ll be a sad day. amen.

I get tingley in the nether-region when I see such fine art.

Tell Coach Ford I said Thanks for the probation!

I agree George, EDSBS has no reason to take anything from us, they have tons of readers and our site is basically for 5 people to read. I retract my previous comment if it seems as if I’m accusing them of ripping it off, I’ll consider it simply a coincidence.

Please, people. It’s about the art.

The two of you need to just pipe down while we discuss some fine paint by numbers art here OK.
I always knew that the evil genius would one day end up in pictures with a big cock that was not his own.
You had to know. With that facial expression he has taken a picture with more than just one.

I applaud Chili’s shameless self-promotion. Why, if I hadn’t name-dropped my sweet blog http://indoddwetrust.blogspot.com on other blogs, I never could have ballooned to my incredible readership of 25-plus! I try to mention http://indoddwetrust.blogspot.com at every possible opportunity, whether it’s in emails to my boss or friendly conversation with my neighborhood grocer.

You know, now that you’ve read this, maybe YOU ought to visit http://indoddwetrust.blogspot.com. Or not. I know I will.

Hey Chili, as long as you’re are pointing fingers and crying, why don’t you take down MY YouTube clip of the BC-Clemson game that is up on your blog.

I see it differently. First off, Spurrier has to be at least 150 feet tall since he is clearly dominating over the background of Williams Brice. I see this as more of an allusion to St George. As St George once slayed a dragon, so shall Spurrier slay the Gamecock’s opponents and finally lead the South Carolina faithful to glory. OR this could just be another syphilitic hallucination, since St George is the patron saint of that too.

He looks like Prince Lazar launching the mythical black falcon that sealed the doom of 70,000 Serbian youth on the plains of Kosovo . Sadly, creepy art aside, I fear the same fait awaits the 2006 SC Cocks.

 In this version, who plays the Ottoman Turks? UF or Clemson.?. It has be Clemson.
I think Tommy Bowden would look dashing in a fez…
 
Urban is more of a helicopter beanie kind of guy…

forget the “are” after “you’re” in my prior comment, but the point still stands: Chili needs to be careful of his glass house.

Who’s Danny Ford?

It’s actually “Big Huckin’ Chicken” :

http://www.huckinchicken.com/home.php

Huh…they have Buckin’ Chicken and Huckin’ Chicken

Who knew?

Damn, Ness. Spent some time in the Balkans? Next thing you’ll be talking about what a badass Skandarbok was versus the Turks.

Good ole Skandarbok…I wish Chan Gailey had him at LB…of course he would probably bench him b/c Skan only likes goat milk and would hate having to watch Matlock re-runs as part of his film study…

I too was impressed with the Prince Lazar reference.

We have a bottle of Skandarbok cognac from Kosovo. It tastes like gasoline. Which means it’s actually pretty good.

By artfully neglecting the stadium lights, the artist keeps Williams-Brice from its usual “dead cockroach” appearance.

So what exactly is Spurrier doing with his right hand?

Any of those Balkan brandies (rakija in Makedonia, shlivovitz in Serbia) are specifically designed to dip your rag in when you’re cleaning engine parts. The crazy thing is how those bastards like to start meetings at 10am by passing shots around the table. And the fact that everybody has his own homemade recipe for making it. God, I have done some stupid things in my lifetime, but drinking any quantity of that stuff takes the cake…

MG Cracker:

It looks like he is Choking his Chicken, which is painted the school color blue, and it looks like he is about to finish.

To see all the various artworks of Daniel A. More visit www.newlifeart.com then click on Daniel Moore Gallery on the menu.

A virtual cornucopia of sports art!

That was the best ten dollar donation I have ever made, I tell you what Orson, with my $10 why don’t you go have a COCKtail!!

Kahuna,

I’ve had some Romanian moonshine before and I imagine it’s equally as brutal as the stuff you’re describing. One of my friend’s father got killed in those European floods a few years back and someone gave her some homebrew to have the 40 day memorial meal with (an Orthodox tradition) when she got back to the States.

I had about a thimbleful in the first sip and I could’ve breathed fire after that. One of Romanians eating with us said they’d drink the stuff and run around in the snow in their underwear back home. It’s liquid fire.

Wait, wait, wait, what was the artist thinking? How is this even possible? A gamecock landing on someones hand. His hand would be cut to pieces. Maybe to make this painting a little more realistic the painter could have added spurting blood just after the gamecock tears into one of spurriers main arteries with its talons.

That or he could have framed it with garnett colored marble bordering and a “limited edition collectors coin” to commemorate megachicken. Furthermore, hes not actually looking directly at the gamecock, hes looking beyond it. Maybe to the future, you know, the one where Clemson runs the score up on SCU at the end of the year like always? Also, judging from Columbia, those aren’t clouds or a haze, thats just the sunlight hitting the smog at the right angle. That megachicken looks pissed.

It is Florida’s old playbook or am I just a fool for the obvious.

Very shitty. That looks like it was painted by a 4th grader. Spurrier looks like Dale Gribble without the sunglasses.

4th grader? That’s a slap in the face to all 4th grade artists. People actually buy this shit?

Think I could convince Mrs. Gamecock to let me hang this over the bed?

She’s been complaining about a lack of a big cock in the bedroom for years.

I was actually at a business dinner about a month ago and had a very drinkable rakija cocktail. Too drinkable. I ended up in a strip club with two chinese dudes and ultimately ended up locked outside of my apartment between the hours of 4 and 4:30 am….ah Wednesdays. If anyone is up in NY let me know, the first one is on me; rec for a bail bondsman also complimentary.

I can soooooo see spur-daddy telling that freak of a bird, “Son, you shit on me and this visor’s comin off.”

Hey guys, who is the artist on that?

I want to commission a little something for our offices.

Shirt off, full flex . . . you know something really classy to mark my time here in Oxford.

Thanks,

EO