CORNER...BACK? ATKINS RUMORS PLAGUE UF.

by Orson on Jun 19, 2006 5:36 PM EDT

Rumors swirl around Florida CB Avery Atkins--he's off Florida's team, he's wanted, warrants have been sworn out for his arrest--but here's what we know right now:

1. Atkins is still on the team. He missed portions of spring practice to deal with "family issues," which could mean anything you want them to. For our part, we'll start the rumor that "family issues" meant Atkins was in fact a werewolf, and was seeking out the assistance of a powerful voodoo priestess that lived in the swamps of Volusia county during his time away from the team.

2. No warrants have been sworn out for him in Volusia County. We know this because we called the Warrants Department of Daytona Beach and asked. (Really. It's amazing what happens when you call people. Sometimes, they talk to you.) So if he did anything wrong, as message boards and one Rivals pay site are hinting very strongly at, then it a.) didn't happen in Daytona, and b.) it's not on the books yet. (NB: the Alachua County Sheriff's Department will not give out information re: warrants over the phone.)

3. Avery's 19 and has a wife of the licensed, legally obligated variety and a kid, which can't be easy.

3. Losing Avery would suck, suck, suck for the secondary, and turn the puddleish depth we've got already into a meniscus of young corners in need of instant savvy.

Avery Atkins, rumor magnet.

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I heard that he shot a homeland security officer and is in GITMO. He’s already on a hunger strike. It’s true. I heard it from a guy who knows a guy. He was wearing jorts so he must have inside information.

by tnirishfan on Jun 19, 2006 6:15 PM EDT reply actions

I was enjoying the 3.99 Tits & Grits Special at Cafe Risque and caught some hot rumors from someone wearing jorts as well.

Avery is seeking political asylum in the Republic of Dee.

by PJ on Jun 19, 2006 6:20 PM EDT reply actions

Off topic, but I saw a dude sporting the Ohio State Hat on a Dateline piece on sexual predators. Evidently the dude thought he was gonna score with a 14 yr old. Instead he got booked.

by Brian on Jun 19, 2006 8:41 PM EDT reply actions

Ah, Cafe Risque, on the road to Micanopy. They dare, they bare. And run inside info on UF athletics.

by Newspaper Hack on Jun 19, 2006 8:54 PM EDT reply actions

More importantly, how does this affect the Fulmer Cup?

by NavyGrad on Jun 19, 2006 9:06 PM EDT reply actions

Santonio Holmes beat up the mother of one of his 3 kids again. It appears that the thuggery doesn’t end after (chuckles) graduating tOSU.

by uncle_romie on Jun 19, 2006 9:36 PM EDT reply actions

i have MANY kids

by Shawn Kemp on Jun 20, 2006 1:04 AM EDT reply actions

Atkins was probably looking for Myrlene Severe. (Trying to come up with a joke for this name – uh, assistant dean of students at Oakland Tech?). Dave Barry’s dead horse aside, it seems like this stuff really does only happen in Florida.

by Phil K. on Jun 20, 2006 2:00 AM EDT reply actions

PJ truly classic

by Jonathan on Jun 20, 2006 8:24 AM EDT reply actions

well, it may help that we are apparently getting some guy from utah. he was a freshman all american his redshirt year, then graduated this past year, so he can transfer without skipping out a year. from the gatorsports message board, it sounds like he is definitely going to be in gainesville next season, which, knowing the credibility of message boards, probably means that all cars are actually dragon robots, waiting until they can overthrow humans and rule the galaxy.

by adam on Jun 20, 2006 8:52 AM EDT reply actions

the cb situation may not be as dire as you think. Apparently, Ryan Smith, corner from Utah, is planning on transferring to UF and due to an NCAA loophole is allowed to play immeadiately due to being graduated. He has two years to play two.

I didn’t find a mainstream media story yet but it sounds like its done on the Gator message boards.

The Utah fans aren’t shedding any tears about him leaving. Everyone seems to think he was half-assing it last season although they loved him as a frosh.

here’s a profile

by Pace on Jun 20, 2006 9:02 AM EDT reply actions