Everyday Should Be Saturday

June 1, 2006

WVU: BURNING COUCH-RICH, CASH POOR?

A fly in the whiskey-scented ointment of West Virginia’s otherwise hype-heavy offseason–a zillion coaches cruising in to learn the spread option, the afterglow of a shocking Sugar Bowl defeat of Georgia, and scads of hype raining down from media–are the ongoing contract negotiations between head coach Rich Rodriguez and the West Virginia admins. The article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette nabs a peek into just how contentious negotiations between the Suits and The Head have become.

A spokesman said it’s athletic department policy to refrain from publicly discussing such personnel matters as contracts. The source said, however, that athletic director Ed Pastilong has been replaced in negotiations by university president David C. Hardesty and general counsel Tom Dorer.

Meaning that Ed and Rich aren’t tossing back Frescas and getting all happy back-slappy during contract negotiations, which still fails to explain why West Virgina won’t budge on the buyout clauses and coach raises making the negotiation such a thorny one. Rodriguez already makes less than possibly five of the other coaches in the Big East, including–pause, wait for salt in wound–the Wannstache. Square this disparity with The Head going Continental Tire–>Gator–>Sugar Bowl, winning a share of the Big East title three years in a row, and coaching a balls-out season last year while capping it with the highest ranking in school history at fifth in the nation, and there’s two guys who’d like to place you on retainer waiting for your call in Morgantown.


The massive head holding the highly desirable brain of Rich Rodriguez.

YEE.HAW. THE EDSBS PODCAST GOES COWBOY WITH JOHN LOPEZ.

Yee-haw! On the heels of Bruce Feldman proclaiming the Lone Star State as college football’s pre-eminent kingdom, we take a spell to sit with John Lopez of the Houston Chronicle, a blogger in his own right who covers Texas football with us all the way from Houston to El Paso. The cell phone dumps us twice along the way, but fortunately Stranko is there in the gaps to assist, catching us up on his offseason travels, what he loves about Texas, and debating if there’s enough room in the Mustache Wednesday Hall of Fame for both Burt Reynolds and Tom Selleck. (You’ll also hear Stranko Mark Two in the background–we consider him adjunct staff.)

Click here to listen for now. The podcast feed will be up tomorrow. At about 40 minutes, you may want to break it up, or just bounce to the Mike Jones while you work. Four fours. Four fours. Four fours. Four fours.


Stranko: missed Brangelina in Namibia.

TEN THINGS WE’D LIKE TO HEAR BRENT MUSBERGER SAY

Following up on a conversation we had with Stranko last night–soon to be encased in the upcoming podcast, should the hamsters powering the MP3 encoder ever finish their work–we present the ten things we’d like to hear Brent Musberger say.

Ten Things We’d Like To Hear Brent Musberger Say.

10. “You’re looking live…at my fat white ass! (shaking exposed buttocks) Jiggledy jiggledy doo, America!”

9. Gary Danielson: That’s just the kind of linebacker he is, Brent. Hits ‘em hard, and likes to hit’em from all sides, but especially from behind.

Brent: “My kind of man, Gary. My kind of man.”

8. “He’s hit, and he’s on his back like Phyllis George!!!”

7. “There’s that man again. The one with the sweet, sweet cheeks.”

6. “And if he’s not gone for a touchdown, I’m buying a round of Hamm’s Ice for the house tonight.”


Brent, we toast you. Now say these things on air and we’ll love you forever.

5. “Down to my buddy JACKARROOOOOO!!! Who is totally homosexual, everyone.”

4. “Bukkake!”

3. “And back to the studio to talk to our old buddy, Terry Bowden. Terry…Are we off? Great. Help me unhook this bro…jesus, good to let the old bags breathe. That mike’s not off, is it? (Plunges over rail to death.)

2. “I haven’t seen a display of scoring like this since Irv Cross and I went through a stable of hookers before a preseason game in Miami in ‘81. A fine city, Miami.”

1. “The Florida guys are cranking out the pushups after the touchdown, their cut muscles gleaming in the sun. And 15,000 red-blooded gay men just sent their applications in to the University of Florida, pardner.”

CHRIS? CHRIS WHO?

Jonathan Tu has the latest on the ongoing evolution of the spread option at Florida: gas up the bus and gun it.

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