THIS OLD BIG HOUSE
Michigan is sprucing up its stadium again. The renovation seeks to add 83 indoor suites and 3,200 outdoor club seats, although overall capacity will only increase by about 750. There must be one hell of a market to watching punters develop in Ann Arbor.










1
Dave T says:
You forgot the two runs up the middle for 3 yards, a long pass to the side lines for 4 yards and THEN a punt. I would remind you, however, that other than last year, this formula somehow works for about 9 wins/year.
May 23rd, 2006 at 8:45 am
2
Stranko Montana says:
The Ravens, the Bucs and others have won superbowls with this formula as well.
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:02 am
3
Chris says:
Future generations will discuss the Lloyd Carr Equation with as much fervor as the Gnostic Gospels
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:11 am
4
corey bailey says:
ames Lipton: If you ever want to see coaching at its finest.. coaching that will make you re-examine your life.. coaching that will make you see the world for the first time. Watch the 2006 MasterCard Alamo Bowl. It is a delight.
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:26 am
5
PSUgirl says:
my guess is that the um buttocks are finally screaming for some more room.
in my opinion/experience – the football gods hate skyboxes and laugh at club seats (based on location) – it can take years of sacrificial seasons to win back their favor (at least mitigate the ire).
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:36 am
6
maskedavenger says:
While the skyboxes are getting all the press, there are a couple of improvements that just had to be made. The “seats,” really numbers painted on a bench, will be increased from 14″ to 17″ (or 15 to 18, I forgot which one it is). Another important safety feature in our post 9-11 world is that additional concourses are being built that will allow people to exit the stadium faster.
During a recent football game there was a bomb threat as city hall, which some feared was a diversion to lure the police away from the stadium. If you have ever attended a game at Michigan Stadium, you know that a hasty exit is not possible.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled mocking of Michigan’s offensive philosophy.
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:56 am
7
Phil K. says:
Insofar as nihilism can be considered a “philosophy”…
May 23rd, 2006 at 10:41 am
8
Ben says:
Last year, Michigan’s worst season since 1984, Michigan averaged 29 points/game.
If that’s offensive nihilism, how many points per game did your team put up, Phil?
May 23rd, 2006 at 10:47 am
9
Wooderson says:
Ok, so I just went on the internet to look up a picture ofthe big house. I always though people were joking when they called it “The Big Hole”, but good lord, they were right, it’s actually a hole in the ground. I know ND gets jabs for copying the seating layout, but at least our stadium has a hint of architectural care applied to it.
May 23rd, 2006 at 10:58 am
10
Phil K. says:
36.66, Big Ben. And that’s a lotta dimp.
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:06 am
11
maskedavenger says:
To emphasize how Michigan stadium was built into a man-made hole, here is a photo album of its construction,
The site chose was flat farmland, and a giant crater was excavated for the site.
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:09 am
12
maskedavenger says:
Apparently, I don’t know how to link.
Here is the URL:
http://www.umich.edu/~bhl/stadium/stadtext/scrapcov.htm
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:10 am
13
Orson Swindle says:
So really this is all about making the Big House safer for the badonkadonk generation, right? We’re all in favor of that.
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:11 am
14
NDTom says:
Don’t pat yourself on the back too hard Ben. Even after hanging 55 on Eastern Michigan and 41 on Indiana you guys are ranked 9/11 in the Big Ten in PPG only beating Indiana and Illinois. I’m sure no one here needs to tell you about [NAME REDACTED]’s offense. remove those two outliers and UM wouldn’t even be in the top half of the NCAA.
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:11 am
15
COWolverine says:
“Insofar as nihilism can be considered a “philosophy”… ”
Say what you want about the tenants of national socialism… at least it’s an ethos.
May 23rd, 2006 at 1:26 pm
16
Maize n Brew Dave says:
The stadium expansion has nothing to do with revenues or offensive philosophies.
Its all Zoltan Mesko’s fault.
The demand for Zoltan “The Inconceivable” Mesko jerseys and interviews has gone through the roof. Why you ask?
He placed several balls in orbit and brought down a commercial freight jet during his last warmup at spring practice. A fifth punt landed on a hospital in Nova Scotia, incenerating the building and killing everyone within a 3 mile radius. Afterwards he was approached by the CIA and NSA to serve as a potential intercontential ballistic punter. To be used as a first strike weapon rather than on fourth and short. He declined, deciding instead to continue making the sky cry everytime he smashes it in the face with one of his “widow maker” punts. Lloyd was pleased. Now his philosophy of punting the other team to death had its weapon. Woe to all.
All this stadium nonsense is because of Zoltan. Michigan was forced to expand the stadium, if for no other reason than to keep he punts in within the confines of the building. The liability his leg created forced our expansion, not some outdated capitalistic mantra.
Damn you Zoltan!
(God that’s fun to say.)
May 23rd, 2006 at 4:27 pm
17
dragonash says:
Posts # 11 and 12: Would you consider me a homo if I told you that the picture history of the construction of the stadium was a turn on to this construction guy? Just asking.
May 23rd, 2006 at 4:48 pm
18
Brian says:
No, as long as you keep your penis out of the USB slot.
May 23rd, 2006 at 6:31 pm
19
Steve says:
Baltimore and Tampa won Super Bowls with a great D. Michigan hasnt had a great D since when? last decade?
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:34 pm
20
Brad says:
You are correct, Steve, but the Herr-man has been successfully vanquished and the players are now learning proper English.
“I believe that to be dangling participle…..”
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:41 pm
21
Brad says:
BOOM!
(That was meant to be on the end of the last post, stupid keyboard).
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:42 pm