The bizarre career trajectory of Ed Zaunbrecher, former offensive wunderkind at Marshall who followed [NAME REDACTED] to Florida and subsequent demotion, takes another unpredictable zag as the coach works one day of spring practice as quarterbacks coach at Illinois before quitting to take the quarterbacks coaching job at Purdue.

Zaunbrecher, who in case you haven’t been following his career was the guy who prepped Byron Leftwich and Chad Pennington for the NFL, joined Team [NAME REDACTED] in 2002 as part of Mr Better and Better’s first Florida staff. Under [NAME REDACTED], Zaunbrecher’s diverse spread attack all but disappeared, replaced instead with a clenched-buttocked attack that appeared to consist of:

a. Shotgun draw
b. Five yard curls
c. TE post
d. (Most notoriously) The bubble screen

Zaunbrecher, who was once one of the hotter assistants around, faded into oblivion as a three headed monster of Zaunbrecher, “perimeter game coordinator” Larry Fedora, and [NAME REDACTED] called games. The attack still had some teeth–after all, their 2004 O scored more points than this year’s Meyer squad–but suffered typically [NAME REDACTED]ish brainlock at critical points, disappearing for whole quarters whenever the head coach put his cursed fingers on the button and demanded that they “keep it close and win it in the fourth.” In his final season Zaunbrecher was relegated to qb coach entirely, with Fedora taking over playcalling.

Here’s hoping Zaunbrecher, like anyone leaving an abusive relationship, cranks up his chosen version of “I Will Survive” and goes on to success at Purdue. Like everyone else associated with [NAME REDACTED], he’ll hopefully recover from the incompetent sodomizing of his potential that passes for “effort” with that coach. (When reached for comment, [NAME REDACTED] claimed to be “excited” about the resignation, that Illinois’ offensive woes were “correctable,”and that Illinois would keep getting “better and better” under his watch. Good luck with that!) (HT: The Wiz.)

When he heard about the resignation, he headbutted a snack machine and called a bubble screen.