SPURRIER TO FOCUS ON DEFENSE. DEFENSE GETS IN BAR FIGHT.

by Orson on Mar 27, 2006 8:02 AM EST

After one of the all-timers last year for off-season tumult, including players stealing equipment from the South Carolina locker room, we knew things sounded just a little too idyllic in South Carolina. A blemish-free Cocks' offseason pustules up as defensive end Shea McKeen and former linebacker Dustin Lindsay get tagged for FnDC in Columbia early last Friday morning. Lindsay, already booted from the team for failing out of school in January, is wanted by Columbia police for a veritable ODB-esque series of charges: disorderly conduct, trespass after notice and failure to stop on police command, all stemming from a brawl at a local bar called "The Pour House."

Since Spurrier's renewing his triannual vow to pay more attention to the defense (see: learning their names,) we have a suggestion: keep players away from bars with anything resembling the following list of names:

--"Paco's House of Agents 'n Coke Whores."

--"McTipsy's"

--"Overserv'd: Now with Collapsible Stunt Furniture."

--"The Pour House"

--"O'Bombley's: A Taliban Bar." (Just to keep your players off the DHS watch list.)

--"Blasé's on 7th: Now featuring 'Shots For Tots' Tuesdays!"

If she's there, you probably don't want your players there.

Fulmer Cup points awarded on full confirmation: 2, one for the fightin', and one for the fleein'. (HT: reader Kevin M.)

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Add to your list a real bar in Austin: The Chuggin’ Monkey. Somehow it is not the site of weekly FnDC scuffles involving Longhorn football players.

by Underground on Mar 27, 2006 11:03 AM EST reply actions

I miss the now-defuct Five Points bar, Drink. Broke in there one night (door was unlocked). Unfortunately, the booze was somewhere more secure. So my friend and I just stole some meaningless shit from inside. Good times.

by Newspaper Hack on Mar 27, 2006 12:50 PM EST reply actions

Can’t forget Group Therapy or the former Mike’s Place, now called Chubby’s 2×4. Where is Pour House anyways?

by rob on Mar 27, 2006 4:16 PM EST reply actions

I don’t know. I didn’t see it when I moved from Columbia in May, and I didn’t see at St. Pat’s. Must be there somewhere, though.

by Newspaper Hack on Mar 27, 2006 7:09 PM EST reply actions

I think Pour House is where Minglewood used to be, but I’m not positive.

We need to recruit players who like to hang out at SpeakEasy and Goatfeathers, rather than Sharky’s and Jungle Jim’s. I think we could avoid much of the FnDC hoo-ha that way.

by Stephen Orr Spurrier on Mar 30, 2006 5:33 AM EST reply actions