AW SKEETE SKEETE SKEETE!
Fulmer Cup points are under review for tOSU, but style points are undeniably in order for the Buckeyes here: Jim Tressel has decided to allow a player convicted of fifth degree drug trafficking back on the team. His name: Jonathan Skeete.
We pause and let Lil Jon comment for us.
AW SKEETE SKEETE GODDAMN!
There’s sooooooo many good things about this story. Tressel. Weed. Skeete. Did we mention Skeete? AND TRESSEL? Coming on the heels of Paul finding a player named Lucious Pusey, we really can’t begin to tell you how happy we are right now. Skeete’s a kicker, so imagine the call:
“OSU lines up at the 23 to kick against Eastern Illinois. Skeete jets out onto the field. The kick spurts up and…IT’S BLOCKED! Pusey slides in and recovers, and Skeete’s all over him down the sidelines…Skeete shoots through and annihilates Pusey! He stripped Pusey! Skeete breaks a tackle and goes down the sideline…Skeete….Skeeete… YEAHHHH!!!!”
Big HT to Trent for the most giggle-inducing story of the offseason yet.
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1
Hilarious post. You think Lucious Pusey’s parents are named Harry and Anita?
I have a question about the charge though. What do you have to do to get a drug trafficking charge? Does this mean he was hopping on planes to Columbia (the country, not South Carolina) once a week to pick up the goods and fly them back into the country similar to Johnny Depp in the movie Blow, or is it just that he was hook up for everyone in Columbus?
Comment by rebel84 — March 7, 2006 @ 12:56 pm
2
Sell weed to a cop, as Skeete did. However it went down, we’re sure it was a sticky, messy affair.
Comment by Orson Swindle — March 7, 2006 @ 12:57 pm
3
I’m still tittering. Damn this is funny stuff. And you didn’t even mention anything about Skeete’s attourney, John Waddy. Apparently Dirkler Digg was unavailable.
Comment by Notre Dan — March 7, 2006 @ 1:31 pm
4
How could we miss that? MOGMGDIOGHNDmdjfl…that’s us slamming the keyboard laughing.
Greatest. Story. Ever.
Comment by Orson Swindle — March 7, 2006 @ 1:34 pm
5
Believe it or not, but Lucious played for a 1 or 2 A school in florida around 2002. Oddly enough, a player by the very same name (too ridiculous to not be him) came to town with his team and beat up on my high school alma mater. Small, small world.
Comment by that 5.0 guy — March 7, 2006 @ 2:49 pm
6
I think that I can speak for most buckeye fans when I say that if this is the worst Fulmer-eligible act that occurs this off-season…well….it will be nice to have a quiet off-season.
Nonetheless…the off-season is still very young. I know I can count on a few DUIs to move up the standings.
I havent seen anyhting on the Paxson rape case for PSU…this has got to Fulmer-worthy…
Comment by Teambuckeye — March 7, 2006 @ 4:58 pm
7
All right. At the risk of sounding like a huge dork (which I am), or at best, incredibly lame, I don’t get it. Lucious Pusey is obviously funny, but what am I missing with the whole Skeete thing??? I’m willing to take some fire to clear it up for myself and anyone else who’s silently confused. Maybe this blog’s too smart for me (setting the bar low, I know).
Comment by Brad — March 7, 2006 @ 10:08 pm
8
Sorry, Brad. But AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!
“Skeet” is a newish sort of slang term for ejaculating, or the substance that is the end result.
When Dave Chappelle introduced me to the word on his show he said, “And the best part about it is, I can say it as much as I want, because white people don’t know what it means! SKEET SKEET SKEET!!!!”
And who here is asking what it means? A guy named “Brad.” Somewhere, Dave Chappelle is smiling.
Comment by Kevin Beane — March 7, 2006 @ 11:23 pm
9
Ah, dammit. I started watching Chappelle in Season 2. Obviously I need to buy the DVDs and watch everything. Damn you Chappelle!!! And yes, I am hopelessly white.
Comment by Brad — March 9, 2006 @ 12:44 am
10
Sell less than 200 grams of pot, for Skeete’s 5th degree felony charge. Could have been as little as a dime bag.
Comment by Brian — March 9, 2006 @ 6:15 pm