JAY CUTLER: HOTTZ0RS
Matt Leinart? So ‘04. Reggie Bush? Please, we were big on him when we had an IPod Mini. We’re so into the Nano now, and the Nano equivalent would be Jay Cutler, who’s apparently not seen the end of his pre-draft boomlet. This year’s Alex Smith seeks to make jillions from NFL execs with his Senior Bowl workout heroics, which were enough to obscure his mediocre Senior Bowl performance. When the New York Post is writing about you like you’re Lindsey Lohan, it’s time to secure the services of a licensed financial advisor pronto.
We Google Image Searched him, though, and we’ve got one piece of advice for Cutler: back off on the bronzer. It can’t help your grip on the ball.
Now we know how he survived four years behind a Vandy line.
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A law school classmate of mine went to Vandy and had occasion to see Mr. Cutler engage in some “extra-curriculars” on campus one evening. Short version: he and a WR of his decided to beat up an emergency phone. You know, the sort that automagically call the police when the reciever is taken off the hook.
So, obviously, as Mr. Cutler and his friend were in the middle of beating up this phone the police show up and more or less surround the little quad area where he was. He decides it’d be a good idea to run… and he made it a little ways before he was tackled in the open field by a member of Vandy’s PD.
Good thing NFL Linebackers aren’t more mobile than Vandy’s Finest, eh?
Comment by Pete Holiday — January 30, 2006 @ 11:29 am
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He’s better than Leinart
Comment by BIGMIKE — January 30, 2006 @ 11:43 am
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This is what passes for police blotter at Vandy, where we have not had any athletes in recent memory:
*throw down with frat daddies
*cave in someone’s face with a sucker punch
*steal awards or computers from the stadium
*pull a gun on teenagers at a fast food joint
*serve time for drug trafficking
I could go on and on. Arguments about thuggery at Vandy won’t go very far. We don’t even cuss on the practice field, baby!
Don’t hate when we graduate!
Comment by Doreblogger — January 30, 2006 @ 1:46 pm
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I have to agree with BigMike on Cutler v Leinert. I am biased as I live in LA and thus have to deal with the constant washing of Leinart’s balls with Perrier and the general banter of all things USC (though this has chilled somewhat since the Rose Bowl), but Leinert rarely had to work very hard to make plays will his stud o-line and all the athletes. Cutler got the shit knocked out of him every game and still would stay in the pocket and find open receivers. When Leinert would get hit just once he would get rattled and all of a sudden that accuracy would wane as he would get Peyton Manning “happy feet”.
We’ll see what happens. I still remember the world-wide leader doing many segments last year pondering how Aaron Rodgers would be the #1 pick. And they were right - #1 pick of the Packers late in the first round
Comment by Dore Devil — January 30, 2006 @ 3:37 pm
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The Cut has some balls to play behind our O-line. I remember watching the LSU D run the fuck over vandy’s o-line this year. it was fucking brutal to watch.
Comment by Kevin — January 30, 2006 @ 8:05 pm
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My point wasn’t that Cutler was a thug. My point was, in case you missed it, that Cutler was tackled in the open field by a university police officer. Then again, this may look perfectly normal by Vandy standards.
I’ll also point out that it was a joke. I’m sure Cutler will have a great career as a second-rate, first-string QB in the NFL and will make more money than I can even think about.
Comment by Pete Holiday — January 30, 2006 @ 11:03 pm
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Every coach in the SEC this past season would have traded their starter for Cutler if given the chance. Every one but one (Johnson) is glad to see him go.
How dare little old Vandy, producing a top ten player! Please remind us of our rightful place in college athletics so that we do not make this mistake again.
Comment by Doreblogger — January 31, 2006 @ 6:28 am