YOUR SCHOOL’S PROMOTIONAL AD IS NOT TEH SUX0RZ: PART ONE
In case you missed it, we’re in part two of a series here. (Most of our serial features end up like the proposed “Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins!” series–not very serial at all.) In part one, we profiled a stereotypically bad university ad, a spot for the University of North Dakota. Hint: essential classes at UND would appear to be “bowstaff skills” and “sweet moves.”
Today we profile a truly kickass ad, one that manages to avoid all of the pitfalls the UND ads and many more walk gleefully into the teeth of: the Michigan “The Michigan Difference” ad. Enjoy.
School: University of Michigan
Ad title:: “The Michigan Difference.”
EDSBS title:: “Space, bitches. Space.”
Setup: A luminous shot of the earth seen from orbit, taking up half of the screen to the left. The deep rumbling sound that all science fiction fans will recognize as the scientifically inaccurate “deafening silence of space.” Three names fade into the right half of the screen, followed by the words “APOLLO 15″ and “AN ALL U OF M CREW.” A tinny, bouncy noise begins to echo, and a silvery dot grows larger on the screen…the lunar command module makes its entrance, and you hear the sound of “Hail to the Victors” being channeled through a treble-heavy NASA relay, with a male voice clearly dum-dah-duh-ing along. An announcer intones, “Our students move on, but the spirit stays with them.” End with shot of big yellow Wolverines “M” superimposed over half the earth with “The Michigan Difference” beneath it.
Subtext: Michigan grads go to space. Motherfucking space. Not just one, either, but three at a time. In fucking space. Which pwns your ass. We send them up there and they sing our fight song and everyone else sucks our hairy cheeks while we stare at you puny mortals from–get this–the furthest reaches of fucking space. Because being an astronauts is one of the few jobs where a person not only has to be a badass willing to be strapped to the top of an enormous rocket and shot into–yep–outer-motherfucking-space, but you have to be juggling-equations, balls-out brilliant to even think about doing it. That’s us. We rule, you suck, and that’s all too sad, isn’t it?

Space, bitches. Space.
Production values: High. Shot on digital with quality CGI effects. Good audio, particularly on the simulated Nasa channel.
Hits: Superimposing Michigan’s logo over the entire earth, which must look to Ohio State fans like the Dark Mark looks to Harry Potter. Associating Michigan with astronaut, one of only two basic childhood employment fantasies to require a college degree (fireman, explorer, cowboy, and pirate are, as far as we know, two-year degrees or apprenticeship programs. Doctor would be the other.)
Misses: Many young Michigan applicants might not know what NASA is, or at the opposite spectrum, might already be thinking about how limiting the federal pension system would be during retirement planning following their career as an astronaut. Lack of hot ass is weak, but oblique sports reference cleverly ties in heritage pandemic sports mania at U of M.
Summary grade: A. An ad that avoids the textbook pitfalls, looks like it had some coin dropped for it, and manages to convey the most important message of a university ad: come here, and you won’t be poor, ugly, and miserable like people who go elsewhere. (Cough cough Michigan State cough cough.) And unlike those Ivy league frilly-drawers, we send mad bastards to–yes— outer-fucking- space. Top shelf stuff.









51
Heath Tingle says:
How in the world does one blog write all this good stuff? You’ve sold your soul, haven’t you?
Space, bitches. Space.
Wow.
December 9th, 2005 at 4:06 pm
52
High Sierra Howard says:
It should be noted that in addition to leaving the U of M flag on the fucking moon, Scott, Worden & Irwin signed a Chater for the University of Michigan Alumni Club of the Moon and left it on the fucking moon. It’s obvious that Scott considered himself an alumni of the University of Michigan, which he is, since he attended.
December 9th, 2005 at 4:32 pm
53
bitterhorn says:
I was going to snark about going 7-4, fourth quarter defense, Carr, Hermann, etc., etc… but an Alumni Club on the fucking MOON! Complete pwnage.
December 9th, 2005 at 4:50 pm
54
RowdyRoddyPiper says:
I’m not sure that stuck in outer-motherfucking-space with two U of M fans you wouldn’t go along with whatever the hell they wanted. Ummm guys…hey where are you going? (fruitlessly chasing moon buggy by making comedically large strides across the moon’s surface).
Do you think an all OSU crew would file insurance claims upon re-entry for all the “stuff” that was “stolen” by “moon men”? (I picture Tressel using excessive air quotes, can anyone confirm?).
December 9th, 2005 at 4:58 pm
55
Pat says:
As an ‘85 U of M grad, I think the ad is great. What I don’t get is the “subtext” comments on the website. F*** this, F*** that — sounds like someone with an education from MSU.
Pat
December 10th, 2005 at 5:26 pm
56
t says:
Coin
I think I read in the paper that the commercial was produced gratuitously for the University, possibly by an advertisement firm with ties to Michigan.
December 11th, 2005 at 7:00 pm
57
bitterhorn says:
Complete promo ad pwnage. U Of M just freaking rules.
Ummm, except to that whole Rose Bowl thing.
Umm, and the 4th Quarter *ahem* ‘defense’.
But promo ad-wise, the Wolverines are just treating us like prison ho’s.
December 13th, 2005 at 11:16 pm
58
Rick says:
Surprise, surprise, UM has the best ad while Ohio State has the worst (seriously). It’s some Middle Eastern girl babbling for 30 seconds that her OSU education is going to improve her country.
December 16th, 2005 at 3:47 am
59
Steve M says:
Yeah but that spaceship was designed, built, and controlled by NASA in Houston, Texas where UT grads are everywhere. So in other words We’re Texas.. you’re Coco.
January 16th, 2006 at 5:43 pm
60
Arv says:
Man, have you guys seen the Michigan Difference commercial for the Michigan Medicine. Man that commercial is the shit. The classical rendition of the Victors along with showing how our school actually makes a difference in the world gives me goosebumps. I would love it if anyone knew a link to this commercial. Thanks. GO BLUE!
January 16th, 2006 at 10:52 pm
61
Angie says:
I have seen the “Michigan Difference” commercial claiming that the crew of Apollo 15 was an “all U of M crew”, however I have found no information indicating that Col. David R. Scott, one of the three crew members, attended the University of Michigan. The other two crew members, Maj. Alfred Worden and Col. James Irwin, did attend the University of Michigan. Does anyone have any information indicating that Col. David R. Scott did attend Michigan? I have found information indicating that he attended the US Military Academy and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Let me know. Oh, by the way… GO HAWKS!
February 4th, 2006 at 7:59 pm
62
Mijo says:
Michigan was once considered the Harvard of the Midwest..is it still regarded with such accolades, or has Northwestern topped ‘em?
September 12th, 2006 at 10:14 pm
63
Dan says:
actually, it’s Harvard that’s known as the “Michigan of the East”
October 3rd, 2006 at 12:04 pm
64
MGoBlue94 says:
Not So Fast my friends!!!
Being a graduate of the Aerospace Department at the University of Michigan (BS and MS) and being a Rocket Scientist as a profession. The damn dumbass who did the CGI has got the command module circling the earth in the wrong direction!
So while the commercial is cool and all, we who are in the know of all things MF’ing Space cringe when we see this commercial.
GO BLUE!
October 4th, 2006 at 7:15 am
65
Chris says:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1392443089343326280&q=michigan+difference
the michigan difference medicine commercial.. better than the space one in my opinion
November 17th, 2006 at 3:08 pm
66
EDSBS » Archive » MICHIGAN FANS: BITTER? NAH. says:
[...] We’re not better than that, of course. But, um…Destiny’s Child is. And that’s a sign that you’re not living up to your full potential, Michigan fans. You’ve got a legacy to live up to along with the moral imperative set forth by Destiny’s Child!!! Space, bitches. Space. Until we see “FLORIDA SUCKS” lit in blue flame across the heavens by multi-degreed UM grads, we can’t be impressed. [...]
December 12th, 2006 at 10:50 am
67
» Blogs React to Michigan’s Defeat says:
[...] Watch that YouTube video to get the joke. The school with the worst promotional video ever just beat the school that ran with “Space, Bitches. Space“. [...]
September 1st, 2007 at 5:18 pm
68
ProFootball24-7.com » Blogs React to Michigan’s Defeat says:
[...] Watch that YouTube video to get the joke. The school with the worst promotional video ever just beat the school that ran with “Space, Bitches. Space“. [...]
September 1st, 2007 at 10:02 pm
69
O-Block says:
I have just one small comment!!
WHAT IS A WOLVERINE? A RETARDED GROUND HOG!!
GO BUCKS!!!
GO BUCKS!!!
Elect Lloyd Carr for president!!!
September 2nd, 2007 at 11:03 am
70
Bruce says:
Buckeye fan here, but that ad is the heat.
Awesome
September 13th, 2007 at 3:19 pm
71
web-log — davidcflood.com » Annarbour. says:
[...] SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT” but informally known as “Space, Bitches” (as coined by EDSBS). From EDSBS’s [...]
October 4th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
72
M - Flightsci says:
Hey isn’t that the University of Texas Austin bell tower in Texas’ infomercials?
Students, drawn by the sirenic voice of Walter Conkrite, are encouraged to visit the central portion of campus, where they will subsequently be massacred by a crazed ex-USMC sniper.
Hook ‘em horns!!1!!
December 29th, 2007 at 6:48 pm