COMMANDER IN CHIEF TROPHY STOLEN, SADDAM HUSSEIN TO BLAME

As Navy is preparing to defend the rights to the Commander in Chief trophy they have run into a little problem, it is missing. Sure, the note left behind by the thieves, which states "Before we win the football game on Saturday, we thought we would take the trophy. By the time you read this, it will be halfway to West Point", might indicate that Army was involved, but that would be unpatriotic to think. The White House has apparently conducted an investigation into the matter and has determined that it is a slam dunk that the trophy has been stolen by terrorists working on behalf of the Iraqi insurgency.

McClellan told reporters that the troops are currently searching bunkers built by the French and Germans for Saddam Hussein in hopes of finding the Commander in Chief trophy by Saturday.