Matt Hayes is still stuck with a case of the smugs in his latest article (”The all-knowing Wise Guy cometh”…agh…) It’s a shame he doesn’t have the forum to be a consistent wiseass in the form of a blog, but that should change: his blurby, punchy style would be ideal for the form. We’ve got to take issue with this, though:

Oregon. For the first time since offensive coordinator Jeff Tedford left to coach California, the Ducks will have a wickedly balanced offense.

Balanced, sure. But effective? The Ducks hired Gary Crowton, who’s climbed on the spread option bandwagon like it’s acid-wash jeans in ‘86. Crowton’s offenses always rack up yards-at La. Tech or BYU-but after months of obsessively watching the game tape from the Utah-BYU matchup from this past season-as well as this highlight tape set to some truly wretched rap-rock-we absolutely hate some of the calls Crowton makes at crucial points.

This one moment keeps bugging the hell out of us. Down 38-21 vs Utah with about a minute left in the third, Crowton calls a play action pass out of a huge formation…with exactly one receiver in the pattern. Utah, who blitzed like crazy last year, still manages to intercept the hopeless bomb for a touchback since…there’s only one receiver in the pattern, who also happens to be double covered. Down 17, and you call this? When your defense couldn’t stop the hot dog wrappers blowing down from the stands from getting past them? Just one call, sure, but another reason why we think Oregon could be a few feathers short of a whole bird this season.

This dog is still laughing at some of the calls Crowton made last year, as well as at your lack of “Duck Hunt” skills.